A Good Correspondence In Deep Insight's Organizer

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iv ABSTRACT

The paper entitled A GOOD CORRESPONDENCE IN DEEP INSIGHT S ORGANIZER describes how to make a good correspondences as a report of the job training process in Deep Insight s Organizer.

The method used in this paper is descriptive methods. The method is used to describe and analyzed the data taken during job training process. This paper described how to make a good correspondences based on business correspondences standard in order to make an aggrement to the other companies. The technique of collecting data is by observing the data which is taken from incoming letter in Deep Insight Organizer.

Based on analysis about A GOOD CORRESPONDENCE IN DEEP INSIGHT S ORGANIZER , correspondences are important thing in companies. To make A good correspondences there are some points should have to be written in the letter, they are head letter, body of paragraph and closing.Moreover, we need to know the background of client, for example if the client from America, we use the formation American style; such as in the date line which the formation is the month, date and year.

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ABSTRAK

Laporan ini berjudul A GOOD CORRESPONDENCE IN DEEP INSIGHT S ORGANIZER, menjelaskan bagaimana cara membuat surat yang baik selama penulis melaksanakan Kuliah Kerja Lapangan.

Metode yang digunakan adalah metode deskripif. Metode ini digunakan untuk memaparkan dan menganalisa hasil kerja yang didapat dalam perusahaan selama Kuliah Kerja Lapangan. Laporan ini menjelaskan cara untuk membuat surat-menyurat yang sesuai dengan standar perbisnisan agar terdapat kesepakatan dan pemahaman antar perusahaan atau organisasi.Teknik pengumpulan data yang diperoleh dengan mengobservasi data yang diambil dari surat email yang masuk dalam perusahaan Deep Insight.

Hasil dari laporan A GOOD CORRESPONDENCE IN DEEP INSIGHT S ORGANIZER adalah surat-menyurat salah satu hal yang penting bagi di setiap perusahaan. Untuk membuat surat yang baik tidaklah mudah. Dari hasil tersebut,penulis menyimpulkan bahwa untuk membuat surat yang baik sesuai standar business, kita harus memperhatikan poin-poin penting dalam setiap pembuatan surat yaitu kop surat, isi paragraf dan penutupan. Selain itu, kita harus mengetahui kepada siapa tujuan surat bisnis tersebut diberikan; sebagai contoh apabila klien berasal dari Negara America maka gaya penulisannya yang digunakan adalah style dari Amerika; seperti penulisan tanggal gaya amerika diikuti oleh bulan, tanggal dan tahun.

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ACKNOWLEDGMENT

I would like to appreciate following to:

1. Allah Swt and Muhammad Saw, for the give life and guidance. 2. The Dean of Faculty of Letters, Prof. Dr. Moch. Tadjuddin, M.A. 3. The Head of English Department, Retno Purwani Sari, S.S., M.Hum.

4. My Advisor, Nungki Heriyati, S.S., M.A., for giving the suggestion and encouraging the writer to finish the paper.

5. The Coordinator of Job Training, Tatan Tawami, S.S.,for the guiding and giving the direction for all students who conducted the job training.

6. Mr. Eko and Wahyu Insight s, for the guiding while the writer conducting job training 7. Deep Insight s Crew, for giving support and togetherness conducting job training. 8. To all my friends and people whose participate to giving support, advise, correctness

for this paper. Especially, Erna, Mega, Sri and Echa. Thanks girls!

I hope this paper giving contribution for the readers and myself in the future.

Bandung, November 2010

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Model 1 :

a. Invitation Letter (Acknowledgment)

In this letter, the writer wrote the acknowledgment letter to the band management for asking possibility schedule to make concert in Indonesia.

b. Reply the acknowledgment letter by management

On Wed, Jun 2, 2010 at 3:56 PM, Dirk Zeiser <

dirk@direct-management.com

> wrote:

Hello everyone,

After receiving the email from Jai about not being able to pay any fee for the show, we had to go back to the drawing board and look at the finances for this trip. We really cant afford to be loosing that money ... The band is loosing there ass already andas much as we understand that the money might not be there, we really need it in order to make this trip work for us.

I also looked in to skipping singapore and fly home straight from indonesia but that s also not an option as flights are way more expensive leaving from there.

As we have no idea what money we can expect to get from the shows in china, the risk we are taking is probably way too high for us. I understand that this is a tour on a lower level but we cant do it without knowing exactly what money we will be making in comparison to our expenses. As I said, we are already loosing more money than we can potentially make back with merchandise sales.

We want to invest in all these markets but as it stands right now, we are loosing around 5.000usd.

Here are a few options:

we get a fixed guarantee for all the shows in china and go back to the drawing board to see how that will help.

we keep the deal for singapore as it was originally offered to us when we confirmed the tour.

we cancel all the dates and see if we can make it work at a different time.

Don t get me wrong, we wanna do this trip and we will do whatever it takes from our end to make it work. But we cant have the deals change the way they were if its not in the bands favor. That we had to move dates around in indonesia and that we had to fly to indonesia on a different day than originally expected, our flights are already 400 usd more expensive per person.

Lets see how we can work on this together ... I assume nobody wants throw away all the work we all already invested in this.

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Dirk ____________________________________________ Direct Management Dirk Zeiser

PO Box: 100 863 44008 Dortmund Germany

office: +49.231.86220-17 EU cell: +49.172.276 8685 US cell: +1.801.673 6010 fax: +49.231.86220-19

www.direct-management.com| www.myspace.com/directmanagement

www.bornfrompain.com| www.myspace.com/bornfrompain www.chimaira.com| www.myspace.com/chimaira

www.necrophagist.de| www.myspace.com/necrophagistde www.myspace.com/theohiosky

--

all the best,

Rob

www.bornfrompain.com

www.myspace.com/bornfrompain

www.metalblade.de

www.gsrmusic.com

We can assumed that the agent want to make sure that they don t want make any mistake when they cooperate to make an contract with other management. For sure, they had list the terms of payment and rules. Next, they won t loss of financial. c. Inquiry letter; Reply and asking for schedule

From: eko insight <extreme_organizer@yahoo.com> Subject: Born From Pain - Indonesia

To: "Rob Franssen" <robbfp@gmail.com> Cc: dirk@direct-management.com

Date: Friday, 2 April, 2010, 10:40 AM

Hey Rob,

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July 27th (Tue) travel to Indonesia from Bangkok* July 28th (Wed) Jakarta, Indonesia

July 29th (Thu) Samarinda, Indonesia July 30th (Fri) Bandung, Indonesia July 31th (Sat) Pontianak, Indonesia

August 1 (Sun) travel to Japan from Indonesia*/possible show *flights provided by band

Indonesia portion of Tour : - Fees: 250 USD/show

- ground transportation for 5 person, backline, food & drink, sleeping places for 5 person provided

Cheers, Eko myspace.com/extreme_organizer myspace.com/deep_insight

In this letter, the owner reply the previous letter and explain what the agent wants until they make a deal.

d. Reply available the schedule by management

Re: Born From Pain Asia tour

Sat urday, 1 May, 2010, 5: 25 PM

From:This sender is Dom ainKeys verified " Rob Franssen" < robbfp@gm ail.com > View cont act det ails

To:" Eko I nsight " < ext rem e_organizer@yahoo.com >

All good!

Eko, can you sen me the list again with all the

dates+venues, I can't

find the mail you sent before! So I can put

them up today?

Thanks!

R

The agent and band are agreed for the schedule and they ask again for make sure that the dates and venue are available for the next show in Indonesia.

e. Promotion Letter

From: eko insight [mailto:extreme_organizer@yahoo.com] Sent: Tuesday, March 16, 2010 11:12 AM

To: Jockey Indy Pop

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interested with Born From Pain (Holland) ?? here's terms

Date : Tue, 13 July

Fees : USD 500 include flights

Other : ground transportation, backline, food & drink, sleeping places provided by Bangkok

Cheers, Eko

myspace.com/extreme_organizer myspace.com/deep_insight RE: Born From Pain - Bangkok

Tuesday, 16 March, 2010, 12:35 PM From: "Jockey Indy Pop Records" <jockey010167@hotmail.com>

View contact details

To: "'eko insight'" <extreme_organizer@yahoo.com>

Cc: "'jockey indy pop'" <jockey010167@hotmail.com>

O.K. Eko.

Let me know when we are ready to announce.

Thanks,

Teravut "JOCKEY" Vatanapratepakorn

Indy Pop Records

555/155 PETCH 9 TOWER

SOI PETCHBURI 9, PETCHBURI RD.

PHAYATHAI, RAJCHATEVEE, BANGKOK 10400 Tel. 666-395-7100, 662-953-9977

www.myspace.com/indypop www.twitter.com/indypoprecords

We can assume that the content of email above is promoted to another management that would be interest to make show in their country; included the terms of payment and rules. Until another management aggreed and interest to make a contract.

f. Reply the available and match the schedule then give an optional flights (for preparation)

O

n 4/9/10 3:01 PM, "Eko Insight" <extreme_organizer@yahoo.com> wrote:

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Hi Dirk,

yes, below are the flights that band have to book and pay for

Tokyo Beijing Bangkok Jakarta

Pontianak Singapore

Singapore -Home

suggested airlines for :

Bangkok -Jakarta ---> www.airasia.com <http://www.airasia.com>

Pontianak -Singapore --->http://www2.lionair.co.id/or this linkhttps://secure2.lionair.co.id/lionairibe/OnlineBooking.aspx

and here's emails from all local promoter :

China + Hongkong --->Riz :sfscratch@hotmail.com Bangkok ---> Jockey :jockey010167@hotmail.com Indonesia --->Eko :extreme_organizer@yahoo.com Singapore ---> Jai :reconstruxbookings@hotmail.com

Cheers, Eko Insight myspace.com/extreme_organizer myspace.com/deep_insight

In this letter the organizer wants to make sure and ive an optional flights which can be choose by the management for matching with another schedule. So, they won t collide with another schedule.

g. In ordering letter; Reply and accepted previous letter

---OnFri, 9/4/10, Dirk Zeiser<dirk@direct-management.com>wrote:

From: Dirk Zeiser<dirk@direct-management.com> Subject: Born From Pain Asia tour

To: "eko insight" <extreme_organizer@yahoo.com> Cc: "Rob Franssen" <robbfp@gmail.com>

Date: Friday, 9 April, 2010, 6:31 PM

Hi Eko,

I will start looking into various flight options now. As most of the cities we have to fly to or out of, have numerous airports, I would like to get in touch with each local promoter to figure out what the best options would be. I only have your contact details and Jockey s who I believe is doing the Bangkok show. So please forward me all the other contacts as soon as you.

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Also to be 100% sure ... These are the flights the band will haveto book and pay for:

Tokyo Beijing Bangkok Jakarta Pontianak Singapore Singapore -Home

The flight from Hongkong to Bangkok will be booked and paid for by Riz who is doing China and the Hongkong show. All travels within China and to Hongkong and internal travels in Indonesia will be covered by the promoters.

Please get me all the contacts and confirm the travel deal.

Thanks and have a great weekend,

Dirk

!!! NEW ADDRESS ... PLEASE UPDATE YOUR FILES WITH THE INFORMATION BELOW !!!

____________________________________________

Direct Management Dirk Zeiser

www.direct-management.com | www.myspace.com/directmanagement

www.chimaira.com | www.myspace.com/chimaira

www.necrophagist.de | www.myspace.com/necrophagistde www.myspace.com/theohiosky

In this letter, the management agreed of the organizer terms give. h. Complaint letter

On 7/27/10 8:00 PM, "Dirk Zeiser" <dirk@direct-management.com> wrote:

Hi eko,

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canceled (30.07 in Jakarta and 31.07 in Pontianak).

First of all, what s the reason for that and 2nd of all, how do you think about

compensating the band for the 2 lost shows and how will you get them to Singapore on august 1st? This can all not be the band s expense! We are already loosing a lot of money on this trip but can not afford to loose any more when its not the band s fault.

3 out of the shows that you got us got cancelled and this is a huge financial burden for the band.

I just tried to call you but got no answer ... Please get back to me asap! This needs to be dealt with by tomorrow evening my time. As you know, there is a travel day tomorrow so there will be enough time to deal with all of this.

Dirk

____________________________________________

www.direct-management.com | www.myspace.com/directmanagement

www.bornfrompain.com | www.myspace.com/bornfrompain www.chimaira.com | www.myspace.com/chimaira

www.myspace.com/theohiosky

The management make an complaint and ask what happen to another country whom cancelled the show

.

i. Reply the complaint letter by management (optional)

On Tue, Jun 1, 2010 at 1:16 PM, Eko

Insight <

extreme_organizer@yahoo.com

> wrote:

for another 2 dates in Indonesia, i'm still waiting for that but will finalize it asap Jakarta and Pontianak are no way going to be able to change their deal. they not a rich place regardless what people think. Plus this is the same deal that we gave to bands like Terror and Parkway Drive. Both these bands are bigger then Born From Pain and they were okay about doing it.

Let me know if we're canceling. I'd like to announce the cancellation as soon as possible.

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Cheers, Eko Insight

myspace.com/extreme_organizer myspace.com/deep_insight

In this letter the organizer give explanation what happened 2 cancelled show. Then they make sure everthing is gonna be alright; that the show still on going to another country which had a deal.

j. Satisfaction

AW: Fw: JatnikoAndi (Booking No: B671UZ)

Travel Itinerary

Sunday, 1 August, 2010, 2:59 AM

From:" DirkZeiser" < dirk@direct - m anagem ent .com >

View cont act det ails

To:" Eko I nsight " < ext rem e_organizer@yahoo.com >

Hey,

Wow ... I was getting a little nervous here! Thanks for taking care of

it ... The flight times work perfect!

I will be in touch tomorrow about a few things but am glad that this

got worked out!

Dirk

__________________________

Direct Management

Dirk Zeiser

cell: +49.172.276 868 5

US cell: +1.801.673 601 0

office: +49.231.86 220 17

dirk@direct-management.com

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CHAPTER I

INTRODUCTION

1.1

Background

Job training, as one of the subject in 7th semester gives an opportunity for students to develop their competence because they can apply any given lesson they got. Moreover, students get an experience of a real condition in the workfield.

The student can choose a company or an organization where they do the job training. The writer chose Deep Insight. It is an event organizer which responsible to arrange a plan in order to make a successful events especially in making a shows for the band. Many people are interested to become an event organizer because working in an event organizer is fun and there is no fix time like an employee in an office.

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has raised the interest of the writer to take this topic as the job training report. Thus, the paper entitle: A GOOD CORRESPONDENCE IN DEEP INSIGHT S ORGANIZER.

1.2

Objective

The purpose of this job training is to fulfill one of the requirements of Sarjana Degree, and the purpose of writing this topic is to examine the common terms and good correspondences in Deep Insight s Organizer.

1.3

Method

The writer uses descriptive methods that focused on systematic description regarding to the fact and characteristic of the research subject and object directly as cited Hartoto (2009) stated that Metode penelitian deskriptif merupakan metode penelitian yang berusaha menggambarkan dan menginterpretasi objek sesuai dengan apa adanya . In this paper, the writer tries to give best explanation regarding to the data found during conducted job training.

1.4

Place and Time

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CHAPTER II

THE GENERAL DESCRIPTION OF DEEP INSIGHT S

In this chapter, the writer will elaborate description about Deep Insight s event organizer. Deep insight is an event organizer who is promoting and inviting many overseas performers. It was established on March 2000 in Bandung. The location of the organizer is Pasundan Street / 24th Palaguna building block A Bandung.

The historical background of Deep Insight s organizer began from the owner s idea, who is the ex-guitarist / bassist Disgorged Organs, Morbus Corpse and Balcony, to maintain the existence in underground scene. Up to now Deep Insight has made an events. Some events held by the organizer will be described as below:

The organizer has succeeded make an events by local performs on 2000 until 2003

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Nowadays, Deep Insight is one of the event organizer focused on arranging the show in Bandung, West Java. Besides, the other purpose of organizer is to build a trust to the overseas performers that Indonesia is a good place for overseas performance to make a show.

Deep Insight s Organization have six departements. First department is Director which is taking a responsibilty for whole the events and payment. Second is Production Manager which is responsible to the process of the events behind the scene. Third is Event Manager which is responsible to hold an events. Next, Public relation which is responsible to make a good relation with the client and offer the events. Marketing which is responsible to make promotion about the Deep Insight s organizer. Merchandiser sells all the merchandise of Deep Insight. And here are the jobholder of each departement :

1. Andi Jatniko Aka Eko Insight as Director

2. Wahyu Mulyana aka Wahyu Insight as Production Manager 3. Agus Nurrohman aka Agus Insight as Event Manager 4. Prasetya Nugraha as Public Relation

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CHAPTER III

THE DESCRIPTION OF THE ACTIVITIES

3.1 Job Position and Coordination

The position of the writer during in Deep Insight s Organization is an assistant of the production manager who is responsible to reply an email.

During the job training process, there are two people who guide the writer; that is the manager production and the owner

a. Andi Jatniko aka Eko Insight : as the owner b. Wahyu Mulyana : as the production manager 3.2 Responsibilities

In this chapter, the writer will elaborate about the activities during job training. The writer has responsibility to make the non-formal business agreement into formal business letter from the email received.

Another responsibilities, is that if there are events, the writer has opportunity as a Liaison Organizer and Deep Insight Crew. To run successful events, we have to pay attention in every task given by the Production Manager. So the artist will be satisfied and they have a trust to the organization to make an event in the future.

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3.3 GOOD CORRESPONDENCES IN DEEP INSIGHT S COMPANY.

3.3.1 Explanation

During the training, the writer workson Monday to Friday. The writeris responsible to reply an email from the client.After that, the writer collects and arranges the incoming and outgoing letter to make it into formal letter.

3.3.2 Problems and solutions

This email indicates that the owner wants to cooperate and to make a show for the artist. However, it is inappropiate to use informal letter as the first impression to build a trust to other company. It is better to make a formal acknowledgment letter to make the client more interested. The email above shows some deficiencies. First, they don t put in a company icon which indicates that they are a real From: eko insight <extreme_organizer@yahoo.com>

Subject: Born From Pain - Indonesia To: dirk@direct-management.com

Date: Thursday, 11 March, 2010, 10:40 AM

Hey Dirk,

I m Eko, a promotor from Indonesia. We interested to Born From Pain Tour 2010. Is it any possibilities for us to arrange show on August?

Cheers, Eko

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company. Second, there is no reference line, date line, inside address, salutation, subject line and complementary close which indicate politeness and the purpose of the letter. Third, there are no closing sentences which indicate that they want a response. Finally; there is no signs and complete address which is the essential parts of communication. All of the deficiencies will be describe as follows:

First, there is no head letter of the purchaser in the email above, whereas, the meaning of heading is very important for the company because we can see the icon to show that the company is established. Thus, the writer adds the company icon of the purchaser in the head letter which includes the address, telephone number, post code and the country area.

Second, it is about the body of paragraph which are reference line, date line, inside address , salutation and subject line, will be describe as follows.

As shown in the email, there is no reference line; whereas in formal letter it should be written. It consists of initial of the director / secretary, letter of number, code of the letter, month and year. For example: AJ/WY:001/AC/03/10.

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Another missing part in the email is inside address. Inside address is it an important part in the body of paragraph. The inside address includes the address the telephone number, post code and website.

Next, the salutation in the email is Hey Dirk which is informal in business letter.The writer changes salutation into gentleman for this letter, because the client is from America. The salutation is written below the inside address.

Besides, in the email there is no subject line. The subject line is summary of the subject of the letter. The writer writes the subject line acknowledgment as a subject line on the letter and it writes after the salutation.

Last, another important part in the body paragraph is the complementary close. The complementary close is cheers which is informal in business letter. To make it into formal complementary close, the writer chooses Yours faithfully .

Third, the closing sentence is the ending of the sentences which expresses feedback or responses from the client. In the email there is no closing sentence which hoping feedback from the client. Thus the writer adds: We hope you will be able to confirm us as soon as possible. Thank you very much for your attention as the closing sentences and the expression of gratitude.

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Solution:

INTERNATIONAL ARTIST AGENCY

Jl. Pasundan No.68 Bandung 40251 Phone: 022 West Java, Indonesia 40261

AJ/WY : 001/AC/03/10

March 11th, 2010

Office: +49.231.86220

dirk@direct

Gentleman :

Re : Acknowledgment

I m Eko

Born From Pain Tour 2010. Is it any possibilit arrange show on August?

We hope you will be able to confirm us as soon as possible. Thank you very much for your attention.

Yours faitfully,

DEEP INSIGHT ORGANIZER

EKO INSIGHT Manager

INTERNATIONAL ARTIST AGENCY

AJ/WY : 001/AC/03/10

March 11th, 2010

Direct Management Dirk Zeiser 100 863 44008 Dortmund ffice: +49.231.86220-17 dirk@direct-management.com Gentleman :

Re : Acknowledgment

ko, a promoto

Yours faitfully,

DEEP INSIGHT ORGANIZER

EKO INSIGHT Manager

AJ/WY : 001/AC/03/10

Direct Management

management.com

Re : Acknowledgment

tor from Indo

DEEP INSIGHT ORGANIZER

Jl. Pasundan No.68 Bandung 40251 Phone: 022

management.com

donesia. We i Born From Pain Tour 2010. Is it any possibilit

Jl. Pasundan No.68 Bandung 40251 Phone: 022-91872318

e interested to Born From Pain Tour 2010. Is it any possibilities for us to

We hope you will be able to confirm us as soon as possible.

Complementary Close

91872318

to ies for us to

We hope you will be able to confirm us as soon as possible.

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CHAPTER IV

CONCLUSION AND SUGGESTION

4.1 CONCLUSION

The conclusion of the paper, during job training, the writer found out that making a good correspondences which appropiated based on business terms standard is not easy. To make a good formal letter based on business correspondences standard there are some point which have to be considered, they are head letter, body of paragraph and closing. Futhermore, when we would send the letter, we have to know where the client come from.

4.2 SUGGESTION

1. The organizer has to apply a good correspondence in the business letter to avoid misunderstanding.

2. English Departement must provide more seminar and training for the student English Departement. So, when they conducting job training, they are ready to give a contribution in workfield.

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A GOOD CORRESPONDENCE IN DEEP INSIGHT S ORGANIZER

JOB TRAINING REPORT

Submitted to fulfill one of the course requirements

Widya Yuliana 63707009

ENGLISH DEPARTMENT FACULTY OF LETTERS

INDONESIA UNIVERSITY OF COMPUTER BANDUNG

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A GOOD CORRESPONDENCE IN DEEP INSIGHT S COMPANY

Submitted to fulfill one of the course requirements

ENGLISH DEPARTMENT FACULTY OF LETTERS

INDONESIAUNIVERSITY OF COMPUTER BANDUNG

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APPROVAL

A GOOD CORRESPONDENCE IN DEEP INSIGHT S COMPANY

Advisor,

Nungki Heriyati, S.S.,M.A. 4127. 20.03.020

Acknowledged by: Head of English Department

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DECLARATION OF OWNERSHIP

I hereby certify that this job training report entitled A GOOD CORRESPONDENCE IN DEEP INSIGHT S ORGANIZER is honestly myown work. And I am fully aware that I may have quoted some statements and ideas from various sources, andthey are properly acknowledged in the text.

Bandung, November 2010 The Writer

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REFERENCES

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