The Fantasy Writers' Phrase Book contains substantial new and revised content intended for authors of medieval historical fiction, fantasy, and sword and sorcery. You may be interested in purchasing my exciting new travel guides, How to Start Your Novel, How to Write Realistic Characters, and How to Write Realistic Men.
DEDICATION
INTRODUCTION
Consider the difference between saying, "Fire rimmed the blade of the magic sword" or "The enchanted blade came to life with a wild blue flame." For example, you could combine "The tiger was a flickering nightmare of black and orange" and "The lion bared its killing claws" to become.
HOW TO BANISH WEAK WRITING
Death and Dying
BLADES
Axes, Hatchets, and Cleavers
He swung the ax to release sticky clumps of brain and bone. The ax cuts his neck as easily as cord wood. He growled and raised his ax to the bruised and purple sky. The ax crashed into the door, splintering wood.
Broken Glass
She broke the mirror and grabbed a piece to protect herself She wrapped a cloth around the edge of the piece to protect her hand. The broken glass was crushed underfoot, drawing blood He crashed through the window, cutting himself badly The window shattered into a thousand deadly pieces.
Knives and Swords
Their swords clashed in a mighty clang that shook the castle walls In his hands, the sword sang sweet songs of death. Cold steel bit him, bringing with it the comfort of death. The sword swung with wild fury.
Razors and Scalpels
The maniac dropped the scalpel between his hands, taunting us to take it Razor whispered the poem of death into her throbbing veins. A scalpel in his hand, the mad doctor prescribed her death The scalpel slid easily into her tender flesh.
Spring-Loaded
BLUDGEONS
Brawling and Martial Arts
The bodyguard clotheslined him with one arm gripping his chest. He smashed her across the face in a frenzy. He wore a heavy ring that opened up a ragged gash under her eye.
Crushing Weapons and Objects
With one hateful throw, the rock pulped nose and shattered teeth. The rock bounced off the man's jaw. The rock came away, leaving a bloody crater where her mouth had been. The world rushed to meet him as he fell.
Trampling Beneath Hooves and Wheels
The girl was thrown into the back of the cart and held down. The cart wobbled heavily, then rolled over the cliff. The wagon sailed over the cliff to the carefree rocks below. Maddened hooves stamped on him.
BURNING
Burned Alive (Natural or Magical)
Wherever the flame touched, the flesh hung from him in strips. Her body was one big blister, angry from the heat. Wherever the mage pointed, the flames followed The mage's magic flared and covered them in its fury Yellow flame daggers flew from the mage's hands.
Electrocution (Natural or Magical)
The wizard pointed and lightning sprayed from his fingers. The energy of the spell crackled into her. With a crackling hum, the gem in the mage's hand focused and fired. The strange staff fired green bolts that screeched through the armor.
Explosions (Natural or Magical)
IMPALEMENT
Bows, Crossbows, and Darts
The bolt hit the man in the chest and he went down panting. The crossbow strummed its deadly string. The bolt pierced him in the spine with a shattering of bone. Another bolt slammed into his sternum and threw him back. The crossbow bolt carved out the center of his chest.
Spears, Spikes, and Pointy Things
The fairies pinned him to the wall of the stable The fairies pinned him to the wall. A meat hook grabbed him by the shoulder and dragged him to the slaughterhouse.
LIQUIDS and VAPORS
Acid
The acid destroyed any outward appearance of his humanity. The dirty, chemical soup consumed her. His legs floated in the glass tank, then they too were gone Wherever the acid touched, pain flared.
Drowning
She kicked and chuckled as the killer held her down. He called out for help, but only seagulls answered. The shore seemed far away and unimportant to the drowning man. She gasped for air, her head breaking the surface as she searched for help. He thrashed and screamed as the quicksand claimed him.
Poison and Gassing
There was a strange smell, an ominous mist, but then it was too late. The room was silent except for the steady hiss of gas. The infernal fumes shortened his eyes, nose, throat and lungs. He couldn't breathe, just a throaty chatter in his throat.
STRANGULATION
Hanging and Neck Snaps
There was a horrific snap, then her head rolled at a crazy angle. The man's neck bones grated and broke.
Strangling by Rope or Wire
Strangling by Hands
WOUNDS and CORPSES
Blood and Gore
A column of rushing life shot up from the wound and painted the ceiling Hot, rushing horror swam across the floor. Gore-crusted lips murmured feeble prayers to an uncaring god. An incredible amount of blood poured from the hole in her chest. His white shirt was red when I got to him.
Dead Bodies
A fat fly crawled over the ruined face of the corpse, drinking blood From the rotting flesh emerged hungry larvae. Painful remains greeted me as I entered the door Buzzing flies hung like a halo over the corpse's head Flies crawled over the congealed wreckage of her corroded body.
Decapitation and Head Trauma
The guillotine bit his neck and the bucket collected his head The sword swung, the head spun and the curse was broken. The sword clawed at his throat until his head came off his neck.
Dismemberment
His severed hand spurted blood onto her face. The enraged monkey tore off his arm and beat him to death with it.
Eye Injuries
She scooped out his eyes with a spoon and filled his liquid mouths with worms Blinded and alone, he waited to die. A hot poker gouged out the prisoner's eyes, searing them forever His eyes were like two living eggs that oozed and dripped.
Gutting
Her belly burst and gave birth to the scarlet children in one stroke, and his insides spilled out in a tangled web of horror. She choked on the stench of ripe and broken intestines. The slippery ropes flowed out as he tried to push them back in. yellowish intestinal loops snaked out of the wound. His mangled intestines stank and steamed in his womb like gigantic worms. The knife cut him out like a fish. He staggered backwards, uncomprehending, as his organs leaked out. The first gruesome intestinal worm peeked out of the gaping hole. Desperate fingers grabbed and clawed at her mangled stomach. She tried to hold back the inevitable fate of her leaking intestines. He collapsed in a crumpled pile of viscera and blood. The madman strangled the woman with her own intestines. As his insides leaked out, he knew this was the end.
Whips and Torture
People and Problems
EMOTIONS
They underestimated her abilities but not her ambitions She was determined not to let her past get in her way. The man was known for his greed. He rubbed his hands together, worrying about his newest acquisition. There was nothing he would not steal.
Fear and Surprise
She felt impaled by fear, unable to move. Fear choked the scream from her throat. Overcome with fright, she fainted. Her eyes were frantic headlights of fear. She was torn between anticipation and fear. The fear was eating her alive.
Hate and Revenge
A cruel flower of hatred blossomed in her heart. His hatred, the old murderous rage, took hold of him. A wave of hatred poured out of the killer – hatred and righteous fury. His revenge finished her.
Jealousy and Lust
He had a strange kind of animal magnetism that drew her to him. Bold eyes swept over her soft skin, promising pleasure. She radiated a sinister sensuality that attracted men like flies. Blood pulsed in her veins with a scarlet web of desire. He was all she wanted, all she could think about.
Sadness and Despair
The grief she felt - the guilt - was almost too much to bear her throat closed with grief, she couldn't breathe. With a defeated heart, she put her face in her hands and wept. She was trapped without hope.
PEOPLE
Cannibals
Hanging upside down, her throat had been cut to drain the blood. Blood flowed from his neck into the bucket below. The pregnant belly of the girl was cut open to get the tender flesh of the child inside. Soon, sticks, knives and knives began their fearful work.
Crazies
Her crazy, staring eyes told me she was beyond repair. The man was crazy, there was no doubt. The madness of life has become the madness of death. Cradled in her evil arms, no child could grow up sane. Maddened minds and drooling mouths lurked at every door There was a madness in his eyes that never touched his smile. He remained charming to the end, even as he killed them, he saw what others couldn't and also heard things To say he was unpredictable was an understatement.
Criminals
The killer applied a thin layer of poison to her lips. The killer drank the antidote. The killer was a master of contact, swallowing and injecting poison. This murderer was considered the master poisoner of his time.
Elves
Dwarves
Merchants
The slave offered my parents a price they couldn't refuse. The slave said he could get anything we wanted—for a price The merchant promised he would return in a month or so. The dealer said he would keep an eye out for the item I wanted. The peddler opened his trunk and revealed the goods.
Nobles
Pimps and Prostitutes
The harlot's skilled hand cast a spell over me as sure as any wizard's. Her mouth promised pleasure, but her body told a different story. The harlot was highly excited, almost clownish. Telling a whore a secret was like slitting your own throat. The gigolo was all warm smiles and sweet words.
Priests
Victims of the cult received no mercy other than a knife. A smiling priestess invited us to join or die. I had no choice but to join the cult if I wanted to live. Their souls were cursed, their minds sick with death.
Psychics
The psychic could glimpse the past from any object she held. The psychic focused on the monster until its shaggy head exploded. One by one, the fortune teller's predictions came true. Too many people had mocked the prophecy and died for it. It was said that the oracle's predictions always came true. The oracle assured me that she had foreseen our victory. The oracle fell into a trance searching for answers. The oracle begged the gods for answers.
Survivors
Warriors
The knight's armor was stained red with the blood of his enemies. The knight bowed and bade me pass. The knight's steed snorted and pawed the earth The gladiator played to the crowd's bloodlust.
Wizards (and Other Spellcasters)
The secrets of the dead were an easy prize for the necromancer From the grave, I heard the necromancer call for me to join him. The dead returned at his command. Slaves to his dark soul, the spirits answered the necromancer's call Necromancers sought the secret of immortality.
PROBLEMS
Alcohol and Drugs
The medicine gave a sweet relief from the pains of life. The drug robbed her of all reason. The drug had made a living skeleton of her once great beauty. I recoiled from the monster the drug had turned her into.
Disease and Disfigurement
Hands covered in festering scabs reached out from the darkness. The hollows of her cheeks were crimson with spidery veins. The beggar smelled of sewage and forgotten dreams. At once he reeked of sickness and despair. The air itself recoiled from this unpleasant stench.
SOCIETIES
Anarchy
The Law of Vendetta was the only justice we could resort to Take or be captured, kill or be killed - it was our law that the Warlords ruled these wild lands. A heavily fortified gate in the northern wall was the only way into the city. This strange new frontier was humanity's last outpost.
High Magic
People in the city can never age as long as they stay inside the translator stones were used to facilitate diplomacy and trade. The city was built and defended by clock golems that the Golems had replaced as slaves, while chosen servants of magical cannons were mounted on the city walls.
Tyranny
All executions were public and attendance was compulsory. It was foolish to dream more when the king provided so much I couldn't imagine a life without the leader or walls I tried to fit in but I knew I had to run.
Utopian
A World of Adventure
DANGEROUS PLACES
Exotic Locations
There were rumors of an undead army under the death god's temple. Only the dead knew what secrets were buried on this island. The cave became a sticky hell of cobwebs and guano. Stalactites hung like stone teeth from the ceiling of the cave. Water dripped like hungry saliva from stone teeth.
Rural Locations
Whoever lived here before left it as a ghost town. The ghost town was a grim reminder of the plague. This part of the forest was cut down by the neighboring owner. The forest was deathly still, as no animals lived in it.
Urban Locations
The guilds each had a separate, luxurious guild hall in the city. The Overguild represented the interests of all guilds. A cloud of smoke hung over the dying city. The city was reduced to ruins.
ELEMENTAL FURY
Cold and Ice
A strange statue greeted me with welcoming arms and a sinister smile. The terrible stone face of the mountain stared at him. Climbing the mountain protected us from what awaited below. One wrong step and the mountain's judgment would be swift and brutal. A thousand feet of unyielding rock towered above him.
Heat and Flame
The desert was a horrible furnace that burned my dying soul. The sun shone like an open wound in the sky. The dim, gray light of dawn filtered through the warm darkness. The sun climbed the sky like a king with a fiery crown.
Night and Shadow
She called for help and the darkness responded. A silver moon illuminated the scene of horror. Luna's uncaring eye watched the horror unfold. A crescent moon covered the night sky. One by one the stars winked out and the horror began. The moonlit sky gave everything an eerie glow. They were barricaded with the bonds of night.