Session 2: God’s Purposes for Marriage and
God Created Adam
All other creatures were spoken into existence, but man was created by God’s hands and breath (Spirit). This denotes a special relationship.
“Then the LORD God formed the man of dust from the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and the man became a living creature” (Gen 2:7, ESV).
God-Given Purpose
God gave Adam a specific purpose of stewardship of the earth, afforded him companionship, and established his dominion over the living things.
• Stewardship
“The LORD God took the man and put him in the garden of Eden to work it and keep it” (Gen 2:15, ESV).
• Companionship
“Then the LORD God said, "It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him” (Gen 2:18, ESV).
• Dominion
“Now out of the ground the LORD God had formed every beast of the field and every bird of the heavens and brought them to the man to see what he would call them. And whatever the man called every living creature, that was its name” (Gen 2:19, ESV).
God Created Eve
God graciously provided for Adam’s need for companionship and partnership.
“So the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and while he slept took one of his ribs and closed up its place with flesh. And the rib that the LORD God had taken from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man” (Gen 2:21-22, ESV).
Unity
“Then the man said, "This at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man”
(Gen 2:23, ESV).
Christ-centered Covenantal Marriage
A Christ-centered marriage is a marriage in which both partners are in submission to Christ, are growing in their faith and spiritual practices, and share a mission to serve the kingdom of God.
The One-Flesh Union
“Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed” (Gen 2:24-25, ESV).
God’s Blessing on Covenantal Marriage
“And God blessed them. And God said to them, "Be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth and subdue it, and have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the heavens and over every living thing that moves on the earth” (Gen 1:28, ESV).
Attributes of a Covenantal Marriage
Covenantal marriage is unlike contractual marriage in that the unity established under God expects unconditional commitment and permanency.
“So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate” (Matt 19:6, ESV).
• Covenantal marriages require promises without condition
• Covenantal marriages require promises of permanency
• Covenantal marriages require promises to God
• Covenantal marriages require a willingness to give without expressed rights to receive
Roles of Husband and Wife
Ice Breaker: So, Adam and Eve… Whose fault was original sin?
Introductory “Problem” Passage: Gen 3:16-17
“To the woman he said, ‘I will surely multiply your pain in childbearing;
in pain you shall bring forth children. Your desire shall be contrary to your husband, but he shall rule over you.’ And to Adam he said, "Because you have listened to the voice of your wife and have eaten of the tree of which I commanded you, ‘You shall not eat of it,’ cursed is the ground because of you; in pain you shall eat of it all the days of your life;” (Gen 3:16-17, ESV).
Takeaway:
While both Adam and Eve sinned, Adam was the God-appointed leader, so the failure was his.
Christ-centered Marital Roles
Key Passage: Exegesis of Ephesians 5:22-33 (ESV) for instruction purposes
• 22 “Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord.”
• 23 “For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior.”
• 24 “Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands.”
• 25 “Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her,”
• 26 “that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word,”
• 27 “so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish.”
• 28 “In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.”
• 29 “For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church,”
• 30 “because we are members of his body.”
• 32 “This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church.”
• 33 “However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.”
Practical Application:
This activity requires participants to examine their compliance with the biblical expectation of their marital role as well as to assess their (future) spouse’s compliance.
The goal is to identify relational strengths and areas that offer opportunities for improvement.
1. Write down each of the ways that you currently fulfill your biblical role in marriage (or premarital relationship).
2. Write down each of the ways your spouse (or fiancé) currently fulfills his or her biblical role in marriage (or premarital relationship).
3. Discuss these lists, compare, and contrast strengths and weaknesses.
a. Provide feedback on how each person can grow into the role expectations.
b. Demonstrate- prayer, repentance, action
Homework:
“Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing” (1 Thess 5:11 ESV).
“Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you” (1 Thess 5:16-18 ESV).
The Loving, Leading Husband:
To be a loving husband means that I provide for my wife in the ways that she needs. I know that women are verbal. I must express my love to her.1
1. Tell your wife that you love her at least once a day. Do this without the expectations of anything in return.
a. To be a leading husband I must take initiative. Some of the simplest ways that I can lead are to pray with her, lead a bible study with her, and serve in the church with her.2
2. Implement at least one of the activities listed above. Prayer should be daily, bible study should also be daily, but no less than four times per week, service in the church should be at least weekly. (Find ways, there are lots of
opportunities).
The Respectful, Encouraging Wife:
“However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband” (Ephesians 5:33 ESV).
To be a respectful wife, I know that I must speak to my husband with
“wholesome and edifying words,” using “gentle and calm” tones.3
1. Consider your words carefully this week. Seek to build your husband up and have Christlike patience with him.
1 Adapted from Wayne Mack, Strengthening Your Marriage, 2nd ed. (Philipsburg, NJ: P & R, 1999), 42.
2 Adapted from Scott LaPierre, Marriage God’s Way: A Biblical Recipe for Healthy, Joyful, Christ-Centered Relationships (Woodlands, WA: Charis Family Publishing, 2016),126.
3 Adapted from Martha Peace, The Excellent Wife. (Bemidji, MN: Focus Publishing, 2002), 111.
a. To be an encouraging wife, I know that I must use purposeful words, advice, or affirmations that help to support my husband’s efforts at Christlike leadership.
2. Affirm the positive steps your husband has taken to model Christlike leadership. Encourage him to grow spiritually. Support him in his efforts.
Session 3: Christ-Centered Spiritual Disciplines