Note
Chapter 6 The current activity system of sexual activity
5.2 Division of labour
The division of labour in the activity system refers to both the horizontal division of roles and responsibilities between the participants in the activity, and to the vertical divisions of power and status. The horizontal division of labour encompasses who does what in the sexual activity. This includes setting up the relationship in which the activity occurs, and roles and responsibilities within the activity itself. The vertical dimension of the division of labour reflects the age, gender and power dynamics between participants in the activity.
5.2.1 Horizontal dimension: Roles and responsibilities
In the second phase of the activity system of sexual activity, there are particular dynamics in the interaction between men and women in this research context. These norms of relating
Male
subject Object
Community
Conceptualised object:
sexual pleasure reputation/identity
Sensual object:
female partner
Object Female
subject Conceptualised object:
reputation/identity relationship
Sensual object:
male par tner
Community
affect the way in which the sexual interaction takes place and establishes the pattern for negotiation and decision-making in sex in the third phase of the activity system.
Historically, making the proposal to embark on a relationship seems to be the responsibility (and the prerogative) of the male partner. For example, in the second phase of the activity system, participant 12f 36 says: He told me that he loves me and asked whether we could get into love together, and well I agreed, and that is how it started. This is a strong convention, with some participants saying that it is obvious that it has to be the man, and laughing at the idea that women would be the initiator. This is illustrated in one of the couple interviews (1m 42 1f 27)21:
I: Who spoke to whom first?
M: Now, me, it’s obvious!!!
(Everyone laughs) I: why is it obvious?
M: I think er, its usually the man who usually proposes to a women, its part of our culture I: Would you ever have asked him, or is it always him?
F: (laughs) It has to be the man.
In the second phase of the activity system, the male role of initiator of the relationship is maintained into the sexual act itself. An older female participant (5f 53), the wife of the oldest male participant (5m 71), comments that the woman is the visitor and does not have the right to initiate sex, and her partner is in agreement:
I: When that happened, who initiates, who starts it?
F: (laughs)
M/T: I have to initiate I: Why is it the man?
F/T: Its because you are a visitor here, you only came to the man, so he has to lead the whole thing. You don’t have the strength (power) to start.
I: In sexual interaction, is it always the man? Do women ever want to start?
F/T: I’ve never heard that a woman would start.
I: What do you mean that the man, you don’t have the strength ..?
F/T: The person who would have rights to do this would be the male. As a female you don’t have rights to start.
I: And do you agree with it?
M/T: Yes, I agree with it.
21 In age terms this couple spans both the second and the third phase of the activity system. There is a 15 year age difference between them.
The focus group of older women (FG1 older women) argued that it is the man’s job to initiate the request for sex:
I: How does sex start?
P: A man has to start
P: It is usually a man that starts P: I would not start
P: It is disrespectful for a woman to do it P: I do it, it does happen some time
P: Its true, the women would let the man know that they are ready. But it is the man’s job.
They must do it.
Participants 1m 42 and 1f 27 also comment on this:
I: …… who normally starts to ask for sex?
M: (laughs)… It is…especially the seniors….Ja T: It has to be the man
M: Ja, ja…No, usually…it is that..
I: (to the female) So you never ask?
M: No
(All laugh loudly) F: No
M: She is very shy about it
Some of the male participants reacted with indignation to, and suspicion of, the idea of women initiating sex. Participant 2m 44 says: I would take it very wrong, I would leave her.
… I would think that there is something wrong. Perhaps she has got a disease that she wants to give to me.
Participants in the FG1 older women also argued that there is something inappropriate and disrespectful, about requesting sex. Female partners are expected to be more subtle in making their desires known. They commented: We have actions to let the men know that we want it.
Like scratching him, and moving our bodies closer. Henriques et al. (1984) argue that in contrast to the male sex drive discourse, women are denied desire, and sexual pleasure in women is seen as perverse. Women’s desires and pleasures are necessarily channelled into romance and relationships.
The gendered roles in initiating sex continue into the third and current phase of the activity system. One of the younger participants (4f 15) says that she would not initiate sex because No, there is no such thing that a girl would start it. Another one of the younger research
participants (8f 21) did not think it was possible to act differently: No, it just doesn’t happen that way, it’s never happened that way, he’s always the one who wants to have sex and I’m used to it happening that way…
The gendered and unequal dynamics are not necessarily as extreme as in the past with some girls proposing to boys (participant 10m 16-25). However, the convention is for men to initiate relationships and also to initiate sex.
The participants’ accounts of the sexual interaction also illustrate a game of ‘approach- avoidance’, with clearly defined gendered roles. As illustrated in the extracts on red blankets and bull-fighting (see p. 132), men approach and initiate sexual context, whilst women initially have to avoid, and resist the proposal. Participant 16f 55 says: Well what normally happened was that the boy would keep following you, and you would keep retreating. But I wouldn’t say that the boy actually asked you not to retreat he would just keep on following.
The roles in this approach-avoidance game are also evident in the female participants’
references to not ‘facing’ their partners. Participant 3f 49 was informed by her friends about what role she should play in the sexual interaction:
So I was told to drag the things, and not do it as quickly as he asked you to. By the older girls…so I delayed the process of laying there like a….But eventually I did. And then he told me to come and sleep with him. I also delayed that, the whole process of sleeping with him.
But eventually I came and slept on the blanket… I faced the other way around, the other side, as I was told by the bigger girls that this is how you have to do it, you don’t face to him.
This role was also evident in the young participant’s accounts. Participant 7f 19 says: I was facing on that side of the bed, facing to the wall, and not to him. The generative mechanisms of these dynamics are rooted in the gender-differentiated discourses to which the partners subscribe.
5.2.2 The effect of the injectable contraceptive on the division of labour
The introduction of injectable contraceptives, as a mediating artefact, has also had a
significant effect on the division of labour component of the system. Literature on fertility and family planning in South Africa outlines the gendered responsibilities for fertility regulation and contraceptive use. The injectable contraceptive also does not require the consent or co- operation of a woman's partner and is to some extent ‘invisible’. However, its ‘invisibility’ is