Therapeutic Characteristics
Problems Addressed
■ Fear
■ Imagining the worst
■ Not assessing accurately
■ Failure to reality test
■ Believing what you think
■ Listening to others without discrimination Resources Developed
■ Learning to discriminate
■ Learning to reality check
■ Learning when to use fear
■ Learning when to let fear go Outcomes Offered
■ Skills in discrimination
■ Reality testing
■ Personal growth through learning
■ Management of fear
A timid white, fluffy rabbit once lived by the shore of a sparkling blue lake. Would you like to give the rabbit a name? Or shall we just call it the little white fluffy rabbit?
For as long as it could remember, the little white fluffy rabbit had felt scared and timid, and al-though the little white fluffy rabbit didn’t enjoy feeling that way it knew that feeling scared and timid could sometimes be a very helpful thing—especially if you are a little white fluffy rabbit. If the little rabbit heard a sudden, loud noise, he would feel scared, run like fury, and dive into the safety of his burrow. If a sudden dark shadow fell over him, he would feel scared, run like fury, and dive into the safety of his burrow.
One day as he was quietly drinking beside the lake there was a loud splash that sounded like Keeer-plunk! The little white fluffy rabbit felt scared and ran like fury, but in his panic he forgot where his burrow was and so just kept running. “Help!” he cried, to warn others. “Run! I heard a loud Keeer-plunk. It’s after us.”
A monkey saw the little white fluffy rabbit running beneath its tree and heard it cry out in fear.
Dreading that something dangerous was about the happen, the monkey leapt from the tree and fol-lowed the little rabbit, joining in his cry: “Help, help! Keeer-plunk. It’s coming after us.”
A deer stopped grazing as the terrified pair ran past. The deer, too, took flight, crying out, “Run, run for your life! Keeer-plunk is coming after us.”
They fled past a hippopotamus wallowing in the mud at the side of the river, a giraffe grazing from the tender leaves of a treetop, a rhinoceros foraging through the undergrowth, and an elephant showering itself with water from its trunk. All joined the frightened stampede. All joined the terri-fied chorus of screams: “Help, help! A Keeer-plunk is chasing us.”
The stampede and shouts awakened a lion who was sunbathing on a warm rock. “Stop!” roared the king of beasts. All the animals ground to an instant standstill, more frightened of the lion than of the Keeer-plunk. “What’s all this noise about?” asked the lion, hoping to bring some order and peace back to his jungle.
“A mean and horrible Keeer-plunk is chasing us,” said the elephant. “The rhinoceros told me as everyone went charging by.”
“Yes,” confirmed the rhinoceros. “The tall-necked giraffe told me as it fled with all the other an-imals.”
“I heard it from the hippopotamus,” said the giraffe. “It must be serious for a hippopotamus to leave his mudhole and run.”
“When I saw the deer running,” said the hippopotamus, “I knew something had to be terribly wrong. Deer only flee when there is serious trouble, so I ran like she was.”
“It was the monkey who told me,” said the deer, looking back over her shoulder to the monkey.
“He called out that Keeer-plunk was after us and we had to flee, in a hurry.”
“Yes,” said the monkey, “I just followed the little white fluffy rabbit. He was the one who warned me. He was running and screaming in such terror.”
“Well?” asked the lion thoughtfully as he directed his gaze toward the little white fluffy rabbit,
“where is it? Where is this Keeer-plunk? I can’t see anything. There doesn’t appear to be anything chasing any of you.”
“It’s there,” said the little white fluffy rabbit, pointing behind him and turning to see nothing but an empty trail. “I did hear it,” he tried to say reassuringly, but did not quite feel reassured himself. “It frightened me. It truly did.”
“Where did you hear it?” asked the lion, kindly.
“Back by the lake,” answered the little white fluffy rabbit. And with that the lion began to lead
CHANGING BEHAVIOR
the animals back along their tracks. They looked and searched every step of the trail along which they had come but found no sign of a Keeer-plunk. In fact, they found nothing unusual at all.
When they got to the sparkling blue lake where the little white fluffy rabbit had been quietly drinking before the Keeer-plunk had scared him into running so fearfully, everything was still and quiet. The monkey, the deer, the hippopotamus, the giraffe, the rhinoceros, the elephant, and the lion all gazed around but there was no sign of any Keeer-plunk. Then, just as they were about to leave, a stone rolled down a cliff on the other side of the lake. It bounced out in the air, falling into the lake with a loud Keeer-plunk.
“There it is!” the little white fluffy rabbit shouted out, gathering his back legs under him, ready to run again.
“Wait,” called the lion amidst a roar of laughter. The little white fluffy rabbit felt embarrassed when he learned what had caused the Keeer-plunk. The other animals felt ashamed that they had just believed what they had been told and not checked it out for themselves.
The kindly lion, however, sat on a rock near the water’s edge and explained there was no need to be ashamed. “Fear,” he began, “is something all animals and people experience for a very good reason. Look at the little white fluffy rabbit, for example. It doesn’t have many ways of protecting it-self from some of the big, dangerous creatures that might want to hurt it, or even eat it. Little rabbits do not have sharp teeth or long claws or big bodies. So, if the Keeer-plunk had existed it might have been dangerous, and it was wise of the little white fluffy rabbit to run and warn others. But some-times,” continued the lion, “we get frightened by things we imagine, things we do not need to fear, or things that do not even exist. We need to learn to tell what we really need to be scared of and what we do not. If we find ourselves hearing a Keeer-plunk like the little white fluffy rabbit, it might be helpful to stop and ask, ‘Is this something I need to be afraid of?’ If it is, then it is important to pro-tect yourself. If not, there is no need to fear.”
The little white fluffy rabbit learned to quietly sip water from the sparkling blue lake even when there was an occasional Keeer-plunk. In fact, the Keeer-plunk brought a smile to his little white fluffy rabbit’s mouth because it reminded him of something important he had learned.
STORY 24
LEARNING TO THINK FOR YOURSELF Therapeutic Characteristics
Problems Addressed
■ Dependency issues
■ Failure to think for yourself
■ Set patterns of thinking and doing
■ Being put down Resources Developed
■ Developing creativity
■ Seeking your own solutions
■ Thinking independently
■ Building problem-solving skills
■ Dealing with put-downs Outcomes Offered
■ Independent thinking
■ Self-reliance
■ Solution-focused thinking
Once there was a boy . . . or it could have been a girl. In fact, we can make it about whomever we want because I am sure there is still something important in the story for you whether you think of it as about a boy or a girl.
Once there was a boy who lived at home with his mother. He and his mother were both poor and he did not have a father, though I don’t remember that I ever knew why that was. All his life this boy had always done whatever his mother told him to do and never really learned to think for him-self. At first, many parents might think it would be wonderful to have such an obedient child, but as we shall see, it may not always be helpful.
Just why this boy didn’t think for himself I don’t know, either. Perhaps we could make some guesses—like, his mother might have always done the thinking for him, or he might have felt scared to think for himself, or he might have worried about doing something wrong if he made his own choices, or it might have been easier to go along with what he was told, or perhaps he just couldn’t be bothered to think for himself. There could be many reasons, but whatever they were, that was where he was at the time of our story.
Because the boy and his mother didn’t have much money, his mother needed him to work to help pay for their food and rent. Each day after school and on the weekends, the boy would go look-ing for jobs in his community. One Monday he found work in the local hardware store stacklook-ing bags of cement. It was hard, but he was a reasonably strong boy for his age and when he had finished the shop owner gave him $10 for his efforts. As he was carrying it home in his hand it dropped out of his grip and blew away before he had the chance to catch it. When he got home and told his mother, she told him off. “You silly boy,” she said, “you should have put it in your pocket.”
“I promise I will do as you say next time, Mother,” he answered.
On Tuesday he got a job in the village grocery shop. It was much easier work than stacking bags of cement, but the rewards were not the same, either. At the end of the day the shopkeeper gave him a nice box of chocolates for his efforts. Remembering his promise to his mother, he put the choco-lates in his pocket and made the long walk home. When he pulled the box out to show his mother, all the chocolates had melted. Again his mother told him off. “You silly boy, you should have carried them in a plastic bag.”
“I’m sorry, Mother,” he apologized. “I’ll remember to do what you say next time.”
On Wednesday he got a job in a pet store. He enjoyed working with the animals and, seeing this, the pet store owner thanked him for his efforts by giving him a cat. Remembering what his mother had told him, the boy put the cat in a plastic bag and started to carry it home, but the cat quickly clawed its way out and ran away. When he told his mother the tale she told him off again. “You silly boy, you should have tied a string around its neck and led it along behind you.”
CHANGING BEHAVIOR
Again the boy apologized, saying, “I’ll remember to do what you tell me next time.”
Well, on Thursday he got a job working for the butcher. At the end of his work, the butcher gave him a leg of beef. The boy thought his mother would be pleased with his efforts today and, do-ing what she’d told him, he tied a bit of strdo-ing around his payment for the day and dragged it all the way home. As he did all the neighborhood dogs followed him, gnawing at the leg of fresh meat. By the time he got home there was nothing but a bare bone. His mother, who was running out of pa-tience, told him off once again. “You silly boy, you should have carried it on your shoulder.”
Once more he apologized and promised to do as she told him next time.
On Friday there were not any jobs in the town shops, so he wandered out into the country and helped a farmer working on a farm. At the end of the day, the man gave him an old donkey for his efforts. Remembering what his mother had said, he tried to lift the donkey onto his shoulders but found it was too big and heavy. When that did not work, he tried to remember her other di-rections. “Put it in your pocket,” he recalled her saying one day, but the donkey was too large to fit. “Carry it in a plastic bag,” she’d said on another day, but there was no way a donkey was going to fit in a bag any more than in his pocket. Even if it could’ve, he remembered that the cat had clawed its way out of the plastic bag and run away. He didn’t want to disappoint his mother that way again.
Perhaps he could put it on a string and lead it home. Surely, the dogs would not eat a living don-key like they had the leg of beef. But the dondon-key dug its heels into the ground, as stubborn as a mule, and refused to move. The boy did not know what to do. He had run out of instructions that his mother had given him. Nothing she had told him was going to work in the situation in which he now found himself.
What do you think he did? How do you think he might solve his problem? If you were in his place, what ways could you find to get the donkey home? And what do you think the boy might learn from this to help him in his next job?
This is an open-ended story designed to facilitate the child’s own search for the means to reach a satisfactory conclusion. Therefore it has no specific conclusion itself. It can be used to help elicit children’s solutions, develop their creativity, facilitate reality testing, join their responses, shape their problem-solving skills, and build the re-sources necessary to reach an appropriate outcome—in a enjoyable, interactive process.
STORY 25
BUILD ON WHAT YOU ARE GOOD AT Therapeutic Characteristics
Problems Addressed
■ Being bullied
■ Lack of achievement
■ Failure to build on resources
■ Self-doubt and uncertainty
Resources Developed
■ Listening to helpful advice
■ Discovering what you are good at
■ Building on your strengths and resources
■ Using your resources successfully Outcomes Offered
■ Enhanced skills
■ Personal empowerment
■ Success in what you’re good at
Jack’s parents sent him off to see the school counselor. He wasn’t sure why. Perhaps it had to do with the fact that he was being bullied by some of the other kids at school, or that he wasn’t doing very well in his schoolwork, or that his parents were constantly calling him lazy. I’m not really sure, either.
The school counselor gave him some tests, asked him lots of questions and then she said, “Jack, what you need to do is find what you are good at and then build on that.”
But what was he good at? Phil was the best runner in their class, Jemima always made the best grades, and Matt was the football star—but Jack? He couldn’t think of anything he was good at.
When he got home from school, he kicked off his shoes. “My goodness,” exclaimed his father, holding his nose, “you’re sure good at creating smelly feet.”
His mother added, “If you were as good at anything else, you could conquer the world.”
Jack wanted to protest that his feet didn’t smell, but he just gave up and sulked off to his bed-room, where he flopped on the floor in the corner. Mrs. Meow, his cat, walked up to him, sniffed his feet . . . and passed out.
Jack got up and moved away, and Mrs. Meow woke up. “How curious,” he thought, walking back to put his feet under her nose. She passed out again. That night he went to sleep thinking about his counselor’s words.
In the morning he woke up with an idea for an experiment. The next few days he went with-out changing his socks. When his mother questioned why he hadn’t put any dirty socks in the laun-dry basket, he pulled some clean ones out of the drawer and dropped them in the basket to keep her from getting suspicious. He ran a lot, especially on hot days when his feet would get sweaty. He avoided showering, just running the water for a while and wetting his hair to make his mother think he’d washed. He didn’t want to spoil the effect. He wore his sneakers to bed at night . . . until he thought it was time for the experiment.
In his room, he lay on his bed, took his socks off, looked at his clock, then held the socks to his nose. He looked at the clock again. Exactly 53 minutes and 27 seconds had passed. It worked! They could knock a boy out, just like they had Mrs. Meow. For the ultimate test, however, he knew they would have to be stronger. Then he had the best idea yet.
He snuck some Gorgonzola cheese from the fridge and spread it in his socks. He continued to run, and wear his sneakers to bed, waiting for the right day. Soon it happened. Two school bullies cornered him in the toilets, teasing him, poking at him, and throwing some light punches. Cool Jack
CHANGING BEHAVIOR
bent down, kicked off his shoes and pointed his feet in their direction. “Yuk,” they screamed together and, before they had a chance to run, all three passed out—just like Mrs Meow.
“This is great,” thought Jack. He didn’t need to worry about being bullied anymore, but he knew he had to keep building on his secret weapon.
Arriving home from school one day, he found a strange car in the driveway. The house door was open. That shouldn’t be; his mom and dad were at work and he should have been the first one home.
Quietly, he snuck inside, peeked around a corner, and saw a robber going through the drawers in his parents’ bedroom. Cool Jack undid his shoes, pulled off both socks, and crept up behind the robber, pushing his socks into the robber’s face. The poor guy didn’t stand a chance. He collapsed immedi-ately. Jack called the police and then his dad.
That night he was on TV. Next morning the newspaper heading read “Jack Socks It to Thief.”
He was the hero!
Jack was pleased he had gone to the school counselor. He now knew what she’d meant when she’d said, “Find what you are good at and build on it.”
STORY 26
LEARNING NEW TRICKS Therapeutic Characteristics
Problems Addressed
■ Behavioral problems
■ Seemingly uncontrollable problems
■ Self-doubt Resources Developed
■ Learning new skills
■ Discovering capabilities
■ Building self-confidence
■ Tackling problems from a different angle
■ Learning that practicing improves performance
■ Focusing on abilities, not problems Outcomes Offered
■ Success through practice
■ Confidence in abilities
■ Practical strategies for change
Andy was a boy I knew who felt embarrassed to talk about his problem. You see, he didn’t know anyone else who wet the bed, or not that they had told him, anyway. It felt uncomfortable to wake up in a cold, wet bed every morning. He hated having plastic liners on his bed when his sister didn’t.
At times she teased him. He couldn’t sleep over at his friends’ homes when other kids did and was