Christian espouse the belief that Jesus is the son of God, or reading about some Greek children who toss their discarded baby teeth on the roof of the house for good luck may all appear to be odd and perplexing. But, such diverse beliefs and practices – like, perhaps, some of you who celebrate the death of a family member by eating a big meal after a funeral – have a rich history. Understanding that these practices are all justified by cultural sanctions will go a long way toward cultural competency.
Earlier we noted that ethnocentrism is a belief that one culture is superior over another. And, we advocated abandoning this tendency, even though it may be difficult. One skill to help rid us of ethnocentric beliefs is working toward commonality within an intercultural encounter. When we seek common ground with those who are different, we not only begin cultural sensitivity, but, in turn, we may help avoid unnecessary conflicts. Think about, for instance, the possible challenges that Eric and Doc will encounter unless both work toward commonality. As a junior social work major doing an internship in a senior center, Eric was assigned different tasks, including reading the Sunday New York Times headlines to Doc – a 77-year-old Vietnam War veteran. As a devoted anti-war protester and founder of a progressive student club, Eric simply didn’t acknowledge Doc’s past nor did he ask him questions about what it was like to be on the front lines in the war.
Doc had lost his best friend in the war and while he was drafted and never wanted to go, defending the country was important to him. Doc despised anti- war protests and felt that the younger generation should respect those who sacrificed.
Eric and Doc have some real opportunities to understand their very different fields of experience. They could, among other things, engage in cultural empathy, which is a process of learning about the cultural
experiences of another and conveying that understanding responsively (Ting- Toomey & Chung, 2005). Each could question whether or not they’ve ever regretted anything they’ve said about “the other side,” or openly discuss what they both think of the current wars going on around the world, or undertake a game of sorts and find articles in the paper that reflect both Eric’s and Doc’s points of view. The goal in establishing commonality is to avoid focusing on difference and work toward focusing on similarity. Of course, no one really expects Eric and Doc to become best friends – although these kinds of relationships have flourished. Rather, the goal is for each of them to be appreciative of the worldviews of the other. This mutual respect will likely result in less conflict and increased consideration of their cultural backgrounds as they relate to war, protest, and love of country.
A third skill recommendation for improving intercultural understanding pertains to establishing cultural equity. When we establish this sort of equity, we are not prioritizing one culture over another. Any perception of cultural priority should be avoided and instead, both intercultural communicators need to work toward the adage: “We’re all in this together.”
Related to cultural equity is cultural appropriation. Individuals who culturally appropriate use a culture’s values and practices and use them in ways that are incongruent with or unintended by the original culture.
Appropriation can be undertaken without others noticing or without consequence. For instance, singer Katy Perry frequently dresses in Geisha costume, seemingly unaware that such dress is akin to mocking a centuries- old Japanese form of entertainment by women. Perry also found herself the target of further criticism as she donned “black hairstyles and dance moves”
in a song with backup by the rap group, Migos. As Daisy Murray (2017) ponders: “Is her dancing racially insensitive or just bad?” (p. 53).
On a less grand level, cultural appropriation takes place in many ways.
Mia Mercado (2017) notes that “borrowing” from another culture is not bad.
What becomes problematic is when this sort of “appreciation” becomes rooted in stereotyping or a fetishizing of another culture. Think about the everyday appropriations, including the view that one can understand a culture based upon eating a particular type of food (tacos – Mexicans), (spaghetti – Italians), and (grits – Southerners in the USA). Mercado put it succinctly when she noted that one should not cherry pick cultural elements without understanding the consequence of such ignorant behaviors.
Our final suggestion for cultural understanding is something you do each week: study. Don’t be shy and commit to educating yourself about other cultures and cultural practices. Taking this course is a beginning but it is only a brief foray into an exciting and life-changing area. Nearly every job you encounter will require you to be culturally aware, and becoming informed about culture and diversity should be a lifelong practice. How can this be done? Several opportunities exist. Listen to community lectures and discussions about cultural groups. When possible, make it a point to talk with people with various cultural backgrounds. Visit Internet sites dedicated to cultural issues. Yet, like everything else online, don’t believe everything written about a cultural group. Be a reflective and critical consumer of this information.
With this backdrop, we now discuss one of these skills, working toward commonality, and illustrate how it can assist you in intercultural understanding.
Applying Working Toward Commonality at Work
The trouble began for Jean when she came to the office and put a picture on the desk in her cubicle. It was a photograph of Jean and her bride-to-be, Julia, at Disney World and both were standing between Goofy, smiling with thumbs up! Although Jean had only been on the job for two months, she didn’t give a second thought to bringing in this picture of her own family – after all, everyone else had photos on their desks. But, her co-worker, Nick, saw the photo as a potential workplace problem. He politely talked to Jean and told her that because she was new to the office, she probably didn’t know that many colleagues found her impending marriage (and photo) pretty difficult to accept. Nick also told her that while he has a gay brother and had no personal prejudice, removing the photo would probably be in Jean’s best interest.
Jean and Nick may have a turbulent encounter brewing, yet there are avenues to explore in order to avoid conflict. Both of them can focus on what they have in common. Jean, for instance, can remind Nick that “love is love”
and that finding a life companion is important to nearly everyone. Or, she could ask Nick what it was like when he met his wife and then tell him what she felt when she met Julia. Nick, too, could practice commonality by suggesting that he has a gay brother who is dating and display a picture of his brother and his boyfriend for everyone to see.
Applying Working Toward Commonality in the Family
Isa’s fear in bringing home Jay, her Jamaican partner of three years, was palpable. The two had met while she was waiting tables in a resort and after he asked her out, they both knew that it would be anything but fleeting. Isa, however, is white and while her mother was raised in the 1940s, she was usually pretty progressive on cultural issues. Isa warned Jay about possible communication problems, but he wasn’t worried. This time, though, the cultural issue literally came home. Upon meeting Jay at the door, Isa’s mom welcomed him into the house this way: “Well, we weren’t expecting this to happen to our daughter, but we have no choice now, do we?” Isa became both embarrassed and enraged. She and her mother always had a good relationship but this time, she just couldn’t imagine staying for dinner, let alone staying the night. No, this time Isa and her mother were about to experience a cultural clash like no other they’ve seen in their lives.
To avoid clashing of any kind, Isa should first sit down with Jay and her mom and talk to her mom about whether or not she ever had a friend who was not white. If so, then Isa should continue to make the point that first and foremost, Jay is a friend who happens to be Jamaican. She could also remind her mom that she fought against racial segregation as a young woman in the 1960s and that the way she’s acting with Jay is not consistent with those ideals. Isa’s mom, too, has a responsibility to avoid bias and talk to Jay about his feelings toward Isa. Her mom will likely find out that Jay and she both share a love, concern, and deep respect for the same person: Isa.