Zulfahmi1, Abu Muslim2, and Muhammad Nur Akbar Rasyid3
1Faculty of Syariah and Law
2Research, Development and Training Agency, Ministry of Religious the Republic of Indonesia
3Faculty of Adab and Humanities
Alauddin Islamic State University Makassar, Gowa, 92113, South Sulawesi, Indonesia [email protected]
ABSTRACT
The Bugines society of Sinjai are those who live in the district of Sinjai (South Sulawesi, Indonesia) and practice the Bugines customs and cultures in daily life. Some Bugines people of Sinjai practice various forms of finesse in marriage. Finesse in marriage is usually used as a strategy or tactic to get married because of the absence of an agreement from both sides or rejection from one side. Finesse in marriage is also used as a destination or special interest attached behind the will to mate. In this context, marriage is only used as a means or a tool to achieve certain goals. This research conducted in the district of Sinjai found that there are at least four types of cases involving finesse or tactic in an effort to realize the marriage.
First, marriage for economic and political oriented. Secondly, remarried as a strategy to obtain offspring without prior permission from the first wife. Third, mating because it was already pregnant with another man without previously informing the condition of pregnancy on her future husband so concerned is willing to marry her. Fourth, eloping or joint strategy of dui menre between the two parties to be married without the knowledge of each family to customary terms can be met. In the perspective of Islamic jurisprudence, finesse in marriage is closely associated with the concept of nawaytu (intention) that implicates to the law of causation (nazhariyyat al-sabab). In response to this concept, scholars are divided into two tendencies. The first trend is emphasizing the objectivity or the outward side; and the second trend is more concerned on intention, inner urge or desire side. In the perspective of the Bugines customs and cultures, using finesse or tactics in the embodiment of marriage can be also considered in violation of customary rules for three reasons. First, it is because they do not heed the principles of manini (prudence in doing things). Second it is also very far from being lempu or honesty. Last, it is violated tongeng which is defined as correct wozrds that everything must start with the right intention or sadda mappabati ada which means that the sound of incarnating the word, in the sense as a clean conscience and a holy sadda mompok pole ri ati macinnongnge. Furthermore, the Bugines cultures also emphasized that the excessive obsession about something (masero cinnae) cannot be a justification for action because it can be misleading. However, the positive side play tactics in marriage is also crucial in related to the hassle of marrying Bugines women because the large amount of dui menre has to be prepared, which is in fact it turned out to be tricked. In an ethical perspective, a strategy also implies the possibility of a marriage that violates the purpose of the barriers of ethics. So in the case of marriage to anticipate the specific reasons both ethically less. Marriage is not just priority to welfare, but it also can avoid damage (dar al- mafasid muqaddam ‘ala jalb al-mashalih).
Keywords: The Marriage Finesse; Bugines Society; Sinjai.
99 INTRODUCTION
District of Sinjai is one of the districts in South Sulawesi Province, which is approximately 223 km from Makassar, the capital of South Sulawesi province. More than 50% of this region consists of land with the altitude 100-500 above sea level. District of Sinjai can be accessed by two transportation lanes. Those are by land or sea transportation. Land route connects cities of district or cities of province that become the center of economic activity. Sea route is used to connect the regions outside the province of South Sulawesi.
Territory of Sinjai government has administered having an expansion for several times. Thus, in 2004, Sinjai has been divided into nine definitive districts with 61 villages and 14 urban villages.
If viewed from the side of the religious affiliation, the number of Muslims in Sinjai reaches 251.419 people (99.96%), Christian has 77 people (0.03%), Catholic has 18 people (0.007%), Hindu has 7 people (0.003%), and no one is Buddhist and Confucianism. This shows that percentage of Muslims in Sinjai is higher compared to other religions.
The kinship systems among the Buginese community in this area is known as asseajing.
Asseajing is a social unity that is formed on the basis of regional ties. While the kinship groups due to the marriage is called siteppa. The kinship system of Buginese Sinjai roots to principle of bilateral in which each individual within the group are taken into account through the paternal and maternal side. Therefore, every person has always been a member of the family and belong to the group of father’s family and mother’s family. The Kinship system in this area has a high solidarity, especially in upholding the authority and maintaining family honor. They always help each other in dealing with various problems in life, such as the economic problems and employment matters.
Natives of Sinjai are generally so religious or fanatics with the teachings of Islam that is showed in their daily basic. Islam is a religion which was hereditary embraced from the ancestors. Moslems are very enthusiastic in carrying out religious events held in mosques or prayer rooms (Mushalla). Obedience to the teachings of Islam can be seen from the number of places of worship that are scattered throughout the region of Sinjai (Hamid, 2002).
RESULTS AND DISCUSSIONS
E. Marriage In The Context Of Indigenous Buginese Sinjai
Buginese Sinjai society, just like other tribes of Bugis-Makassar in South Sulawesi, tends to choose a mate or spouse from relative either from father or mother side. If they do not find a suitable partner among the relatives, then they will find partner from outsider, even from outside of the region. The principle of sameness in choosing a partner in life is highly considered which is measured by the blood relationship or relationship of social structure (Nurnaga, 2001).
Mappasiampai Welareng is a term to illustrate the Buginese Sinjai community when they carry out a marriage for their children. This term refers to the process of binding their daughters and sons in marriage. According to Millar (1995), the sequence of the ritual of marriage prevalent in society of Buginese Sinjai implemented as follows:
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Mappau Ribola (Discussion in the family); Mappau Ribola is a family gathering to talk about the intention of the parents to marry their son. The consultation should be attended by the whole family and relatives who are expected to propose the prospective wife.
Mabbalawo Cella (covert proposal); Mabbalawo cella is a process of proposing covertly.
This is achieved if there is an agreement between two family members who will be married. Mabbalawo Cella is taken by surveillance or tracking the status of the girl and her family before making a proposal official.
Madduta (proposal); Madduta means an official proposal made by man family to the family of the woman. When Madduta is held, the family of the man usually bring a betel leaf, areca nut, betel, cotton, tobacco and so on. All of these stuff become a sign for the woman family that they are coming for a proposal. If the proposal is accepted, both parties further will talk about dowry, money for ceremony, jewelry and any other events accompanied the wedding ceremony later.
Mappasiarekkeng/Mappettu ada (agreement); When both parties agree for the wedding, then they will go to the next process which is called mappasiarekkeng. This process is done in the woman family attended by the close relative of man family and respected people from two parties.
Panok Pattang (Invitation); Panok Pattang is the process of making invitations cards to distribute to invited people. this process is held after they come to the agreement about the good day to celebrate the wedding.
Cemme 'Dewata (holy bath); Cemme 'Dewata or holy bath is one of the cultures of Buginese Sinjai people where groom is bathed and so does the bride. By having this process, it is expected that all evil spirits or bad behaviors of the groom or the bride are washed away by the water and also to rejuvenate their bodies before entering the marriage.
Tudang Penni/mappaci (henna night); Tudang Penni or Mappacci is a series of activities carried out on the eve of the wedding. At this event, both the groom and the bride uses henna leaves as a symbol of their sanctity. The event is held by both parties at each other's homes that are attended by their relatives.
Manrulu/ Mappaenre 'Botting (introducing the bridegroom); Manrulu/ Mappaenre 'Botting is one of the top traditional wedding Buginese Sinjai where the bridegroom is brought to the bride’s home. The whole close family attends the event by wearing traditional Buginese clothing. One of the important activities in this event is to vow or in Arabic terms is called “Ijab kabul”. This is also the process where the bride and the groom are met.
Mapparola (visiting the bridegroom home); This process is done by the agreement of both parties about the time to take the bride to the bridegroom home which is normally done in the afternoon after the ceremony/reception or by the following day. The bride and bridegroom as well as the relatives who accompany the brides still wear traditional dress based on their agreement.
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Mabbolo Kubburu/Massiara Kubburu (going to the ancestor funeral); To end the entire wedding processions, it is usually held Massiara Kubburu or pilgrimage to the tombs of the ancestors performed in turn between the ancestors of the male and the female.
F. Identification of Strategy in a Marriage of Bugis Sinjai Society
In historical records of Sinjai kingdom, marriage as a mean of expanding the territory solemnly have become an integral part of the existence of each kingdom. Tellu Limpoe kingdom, one of kingdoms in Sinjai, calls the process of marriage as Passiajingeng or relatives bond. According to community leaders of Sinjai, Passiajingeng is at least determined by two factors, namely marriage and root. Through marriage, the tactic beyond the process of marrying a son or a daughter becomes identifiable. The fact is that, the marriage which occurred between the kings has implications, which is to expand the power or territory as a result of inter-marriage. This strategy has already been done during the reign of King Bone XVI, La Tenri Tatta, who establish alliance with other king through marriage.
The research result shows that in many cases of marriages that occurred in Sinjai, it is common to have tactics from one party or even both parties in their marriage. The following is the analysis of some cases of illegitimate tactics that became a discussion in the community.
Marriage for political oriented
A boy from a village called Hamka (a fake name) has ambition to become the representative of people in his region. His willingness was obsessed by his admiration for Mr. Hans, a member of the legislative districts, who lives not far from his home in the district of Sinjai, Bulupoddo. To Hamka, Mr. Hans is a source of inspiration and motivation and he is the standard of success in his community. This obsession encouraged him to continue his study to higher education and actively involved in various organizations both extra and intra- campus.
To make it short, Hamka then decided to join one of the political parties in his hometown.
Organizational experience and his political communication knowledge were applied in the political party where he belongs. His status as a single young man became his power to play important role in the party. In addition, his good figure made him easy to get along in society.
To boost the number of voters on the political party that he joined, Hamka tried to find alternative ways that have been learned. There is Marni, a widow for three times in his hometown, a daughter of the head of village, is targeted to satisfy his obsession to become one of the 30 board members of parliament in Sinjai. Although Marni has been married three times, Hamka thinks that she has promising position to be his wife as he wants to smooth out his intention to serve the people. Marrying Marni is a guarantee to gain full support from the village.
Finally, the decision was taken. He then ended up marrying Marni, a beloved daughter of the head of the village. This marriage soon becomes a talk in the society. Political constellation after his marriage was to heat up. Hamka, who was not taken into account from the beginning, has become one of the strongest candidates in his community. The charisma of his father in law is the main factor that boosted his electability for fanatics supporters.
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This marriage suddenly became a talk in the community. His decision to marry Marni is considered improper. Some people think that their marriage is just for political purposes. One of the residents of his hometown named Saharuddin said that marrying Marni is just to smooth his step to the board.
Hamka’s obsession to become a member of the board is one indicator that could strengthen the assumption that his motive to marry Marni is just for political interests. Hamka who originally was a nobody then turn into a powerful figure in politics after marrying Marni, the daughter of the Village Head.
Remarried
Mr. Ahmad is a leader of a sub-section in a unit of where he works for living. Mr Ahmad was married to Mrs. Siti for nine years, yet within that time, they have not been blessed with a child. Mr. Ahmad is not given up to the situation, instead, he has done a lot of medical therapy, both treatments performed by a professional doctors and traditional medicine.
Unfortunately, he hasn’t got the expected results.
During the time of his sincerity to the situation, Mr. Ahmad asked his wife to speak from heart to heart. Mr Ahmad intended to ask the blessing of his wife to be allowed to remarry for the sake of having a baby that had been wished for a long time. Like hit by lightning, the request of Mr. Ahmad actually made Mrs. Siti shattered. She has refused to allow Mr Ahmad remarried.
Having no permission from his wife, Mr. Ahmad insisted to continue his plan to marry again although there is no written approval from his wife. Therefore, he met Mrs. Surti and then married her. As a result, Mr. Ahmad ended up having two wives who lived in different places and from his second marriage, Mr. Ahmad got a son.
Marriage for Passampo siri (Marriage for disguise)
Bunga is a Buginese girl in Sinjai who didnt continue her study to university after her graduation from one of senior high schools in North Sinjai. While in high school, Bunga acquainted with Tahir, a young band man and a local radio announcer in one of the teenagers music festival that she attended in 2011. Shorten the story, Bunga got pregnant before marriage as a result of their relationship. Unfortunately, Bunga’s pregnancy didn’t bring a joy for Tahir. Instead, he asked Bunga to abort their baby. Bunga rejected his request and asked Tahir to marry her. However, Tahir left her without any information.
While the irresponsible man was not showing up, in the second month of Bunga’s pregnancy, she was married to Imran. This marriage is held because Bunga’s parents didn’t want to see her delivered a baby without a father. Therefore, the marriage of Bunga and Imran are called a marriage for disguise. This marriage is expected to cover the family disgrace.
Anticipate Dui Menre (Agreement on the money for wedding): joint the money or elope
Irma, a master in health sector, a civil servant, has a very intimate relationship with a young man named Sadli that she loves so much since a long time. These couple wanted the wedding can take place, but stumbled on the "refusal" by Irma’s family due to inability of Sadli to meet the amount of money that is required by Irma’s family without any negotiation.
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The amount of money they asked for is about 50 million rupiah while Sadli is only able to provide 30 million due to financial problem of his family. This situation couldn’t be enforced.
In solitude, Irma then came up with a crazy idea to run away with Sadli to another region far from home to have a simple married using her savings. Although this idea is actually an alternative way to unify their relationship, Sadli thinks that there is a big consequence that they have to deal with if they go for it. It’s about a social sanction coming from the people or society.
Having this dilema, Irma then found and proposed her second solution to Sadli. She wanted Sadli to agree with the amount of money that her family had set. The remaining 20 million would be taken from Irma’s savings secretly. Although Sadli had refused the offer because he thinks that it is taboo for a Bugis man, but the desire to get married was so big and to comply with such strict customs then Sadli agreed with his girlfriend to take the solution without being noticed by anyone other than them both. Marriage between Irma and Sadli finally took place with solemn and festive and the whole family and friends felt happy. Finally, Sadli and Irma officially become a couple – the husband and wife.
G. Analysis of Items: Case by Case
Marriage for politics interest
The Case experienced by Hamka represent political context of marriage or marriage which is used as a tool to streamline a particular purpose. This marriage occurs solely because of the patronage of social, economic and political so that the marriage bond is not solid. This happens because the basic purpose of the marriage is the necessity for social, politic and economic. Therefore, when they got what they want, then there is no real effort to maintain their marriage. This is one of issues that trigger divorces that lead to the sacrifice of a weak party and easily manipulated.
According to our religion, a marriage should follow the pillars and the requirements that have been stated. As Muslims, we should not only establish jurisprudence formally. However, it is supposed to be total in implementing the religios teaching including holding the wedding based on Shari'a principles that have been established in order to set goals that build domestic marriage to establish a peaceful society based on love. The marriage should have implications for the next world, not just a momentary interest. The ultimate purpose is to be sakinah, mawadda, and warahmah in a marriage that is based on sincerity to each other.
Remarried
What was done by Mr. Ahmad to marry again is a real portrait of the intersection of law and a strong desire that has long endured. On the one hand, Mr. Ahmad has made the maximum effort with his wife, Ibu Siti, to perform a variety of therapies to get a baby, so decision to get married again is to fulfill this purpose. On the other hand, the state law requires a husband who wanted to get married again to prove that she really cannot give him offspring by an official permission from the wife.
The decision of Mr. Ahmad to marry again even without the permission of Mrs. Siti as his wife, means that he had violated the state law in terms of polygamy. Although he eventually