UNION PACIFIC RAILROAD

No

^traffic or driving worries, no seek- ing

good

places to eat and sleep, and

—

you'll have lots of

good company on

the train.

Future Farmers

from

^all through the VCestboard

Union

Pacificatvariouspoints along the way.

Your Union

Pacific repre- sentative can help you arrange a group

trip,if a

number

will travel together.

You

have your choice of schedules and

trains.

The

Portland Rose,

Pony

Fxpress,

Gold

Coast, Idahoan. San Francisco Overland,

and

the Streamliner "City of St. Louis ^" pro\ide through car service between all the

West

and Kansas City.

If you live in the East, plan to see the

West

on

Union

Pacific.

Xo

other railroad provides a

more

complete service through all the

W

est.

FAMILY PLANNING TO GO? ^« ^„

Take advantage

of

the new

^'|-

Family HALF-FARE Travel Plan

If thefamilytravelstogethier on

Mondays,

Tuesdays or

Wednesdays,

g^ by Pullman,

one

parent pays full fare, other parent

and

children under 22

pay

only half fere, those under five ride free. Pullman

accommodations

at regular rates.

litadditiontoprovidhigyourtravel service

UNION

PACIFICservesAgriculturein

many

nays,

Transporting Crops toMarkets Delivering Supplies

and

Equipment Supporting Communities through Taxes

Giving Scholarshipsto

Farm

Youth

Providing Educational Motion Pictures

and

^literature

.^^arlciiltural ^Development oL^i "pa rtnient

UNION PACIFIC RAILROAD

The First One Doesn't Have a Chance

J^A

FOR SALa

^M-

^"^

John: Don't

you know

it's

wrong

to fishon

Sunday?

Joe: I'm notfishing. I'mjust teach- ingthis

worm

toswim.

Evelyn McClellan Cleaton.

KenUicky

A

cowboy, tired,hotand dusty

from

a full day in the saddle, left his

pony

at the hitching railand

went

in tothe bar.

He

sang out, "Bartender, give

my

horse out thar a big pail of the best whiskey in the house."

Said the bartender: "Yes sir,

and what

will

you

have, pardner?"

"Nothing," said the cowboy. "I'm drivin'."

RobertCelnett

Liverpool. Pennsylvaiiia

Sam:

This

new book

onhealthsays that bathing alone won't keep

you

healthy.

Susie: Well, I don't care

what

it says, I'm goingtokeep i-ighton bath- ing alone.

Evgene

Porter Cohimb^is, Mississippi

A man

passing through

town

de- cided to stay over the weekend.

On Sunday

he decided to attend church.

After the long sermon, the preacher asked tospeaktothe Board.

A num-

ber of people rose

and walked

to the front of the church.

The

preacher immediately noticed the stranger.

"I wish to speak with the

Board

only," he told the man.

"If

anyone was

boredIwas,"replied the

man.

Janice

Helgewold

Clarion,

Iowa Worried

Student: I've got butter-

fliesin

my

stomach.

Pi"ofessor;

Take

an aspirin.

Student: ^I did,but they're playing ping

pong

with it.

Richard Stock

Waterflow,

New Mexico

(^^

"So

nobody would dream

of look- ing there jor the nuts

we

^buried,

eh?"

"Sparky!

Go home! Go

back

home!"

Mary: Do you

think I'm pretty?

Johnny: In a way.

Mary: What

sort of

way?

Johnny: Away

off.

Jim Trench

Somerton.Arizona

Corporal: We're going to give the bride ashower.

Private:

Count me

in. I'll bring the soap.

Max

^Jiles

Muldrow, Oklahoma

Chemist: I've developed a process for

making wool

out of milk.

Sa)n: It

must make

the

cows

feel sort of sheepish.

Billy Kelly

Whitehall,

Maryland

He: "I'mkeeping arecord ofallthe good times we've had together."

She: "Oh, a diary!"

He: "No, stubs in a checkbook."

Frederick H. Rohniiller Hurricane,

West

Virginia

''My

Mommy

said I can have a cooky or candy or ice

cream

ij you offer

me

some,but1can'taskjorit."

The dump-truck

driver

went

into the clinic. "I

would

like to see the doctor,"he said.

"Which

doctor?" asked the re- ceptionist.

"What's the matter?" asked the driver.

"Do

I look like a heathen?"

Carlos

Hamrick Dundon, W.

Va.

Wife; Before

we were

married

you

told

me you were

well off.

Husband:

I

was

but I didn't

know

it.

Jolin Shackelbard

Wahuit

Ridge, Arkansas Boss: Well, did

you

get the letter I sent

you?

Office Boy:

Yes

sir. I read it on the inside

and

on theoutside.

On

the inside it said, "You're fired."

On

the outside it said, "Return in five days."

So —

^{here I am.}

Shirley Lewallen Jay,

Oklahoma

"Pardon

me, sir, did

you happen

to notice if that

was

the Chestnut Street Express?"

54

f O WwEKED ^{to get things done.}

^{• .}

r K ^{%^ W E} # ⁱⁿ dependability and economy and packed v^ith every modern feature

^^ \ ^

• j»

.j^ir'-

*<»- g1^

V

^{: -j'T'}

% ^V

JOHN DEERE 50, 60 and 70 TRACTORS

From cver\ anule, John Dtere Tractors arc de- sij;ntd and built to cut production costs and help youmake more money.

Greater lugging power to keep you on the move

in tough going ^. . . better traction to make every ounceof power, every drop of fuel count more . . .

fewer "time-outs" and lower maintenance costs

—

these basic advantages are a direct result of exclu- sive John Deere time-proved design and high- C|uality construction.

Eciually important, John Deere offers you every modern featureto ease up, speedup your farming

—

"live" engine power with Duplex Carbureiion and Cyclonic-Fuel-lntake . . . "live" power shaft . . .

"live' h\draulic Powr-Trol ^{. .} . Quick-Change ^X'heel Tread . . . Roll-O-Matic "knee-action" front wheels and many, many more.

In the all-new Models "50," "60," and ""0," xou'll find justthe poweryou need tohandle moreof your farm jobs, to do more work in a day with less effort and at

lower cost than ever before.

JOHN DEERE

^{Moline, Illinois}

I Dep\. ESS

I Pleasesend me ^fee folder on fhe John DeereModels "50,"

I "60." and "70"_Tractors.

I

r

Send for FREE Literature

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