3.4 Informal conversations with selected family members in helping me to recall my
3.4.2 An informal conversation with other selected family members
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I also learnt that if parents or guardians can work closely with their children’s teachers in schools, more effective relationships can be built for the benefit of a learner (see, among others, Lindo et al., 2014; Mokhele, 2006). This may subsequently lead to effective supportive teacher- learner relationships in schools. Therefore, it is vital that schools, teachers in schools, parents and all other relevant stakeholders take the lead in establishing those initiatives and relationships for the benefit of both teachers and learners. This can also lead to increased participation and engagement in both classroom- and school-related matters, and, subsequently, success in schools.
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Promise: Your grandmother, Lerato [a Sotho word meaning Luthando], really played a very big role in all your upbringing and education as her grandchildren during our absence.
N’thabiseng: Mhmmm, you can say that again, my sister. She really played a huge role, especially in teaching them about the importance of education and grooming them, together with the community’s help, to be respectful men of tomorrow who will love and protect their families and many other people they meet.
Promise: Yes! That’s absolutely correct. Speaking of the help from community members on their education, N’thabiseng, I remember how we used to ask uMaZungu [our neighbour] to stand in for us at parents’ meetings and to check the progress of your work and that of your brothers when your grandmother was not okay. She really helped us by stepping in and standing in for your granny at school when she had no energy to go on her own, and she made sure that she reported back to her when she came back from school. She also reported to us when we came back from work on what had been happening in our absence. May her soul rest in peace.
Luthando: I must fully agree with you on that one. Our grandmother has been everything to us as her grandchildren and everyone else in this yard. She ensured that she supported us in both times of happiness and those of darkness. I actually have no amount of enough words to explain everything she has done for us. I am who I am today, all because of her. That woman is strong. She supported even a cat in this home!
[Everybody laughs]
Promise: She is indeed a gift from God. But one thing you must also note is that N’thabi and I also supported all of you on your school-related matters and in other areas where we were able to. Although we were not close to you because of work.
Luthando: Yes, ngiyakhumbula mamkhulu (I remember my older mother), and we will forever be grateful.
N’thabiseng: I remember how your teachers supported you at school, mostly during your primary school days. Most of the time, they made sure that they helped you with everything they had and sometimes it was beyond limits. When we met them in town, they told us how good your work was and how humble you were.
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Promise: Don’t remind me of the year when he [referring to me] was doing Standard 1 [referring to Grade 3], when his class teacher, Mrs Mngomezulu [pseudonym], bought him a dinner set for obtaining position 1 in his class.
N’thabiseng: [Laughing] Don’t make me laugh about that incident, Promise! Of course, I remember, and that was when we were coming from work to home after we had been gone for two months that time, he came to us running very fast while he had a coffee mug and a plate in both his hands.
Promise: Wait! What followed was that he fell and broke his new plate before he even reached us. He was so excited about his new gift from his teacher.
[Everybody laughs]
Luthando: [Still laughing] Really? Is that so? I broke that plate?
Promise: Yes, you were so over the moon. Luckily you had three left because it was a dinner set. It was a 16-piece dinner set. I am sure that you told yourself that you were going to show us your gift first thing when we come back from work.
Luthando: [Smiling] I don’t remember that incident very well. But what I can remember is that precious gift, a dinner set I got from Mrs Mngomezulu. It made me work even harder than before – it really motivated me. It also encouraged me, but it also motivated my classmates, as I was given it in front of them. I remember how everybody worked hard to improve their marks in the next quarter because of that incident.
[After a few minutes we ended our conversation.]
3.4.2.1 Lessons learnt from the informal conversation with my other selected family members
I picked up and learnt from this informal conversation that other family members, other than parents or guardians, can play a vital role in supporting children in both their home- and school- related matters. They remain part and parcel of the process (see, among others, Garcia-Moya et al., 2019). This is evident in the case above, where our neighbour uMaZungu was asked to stand in for us at school on behalf of my grandmother as our registered parent. In that way, we were not left behind, and we were updated on our school-related matters through her help. Such actions can increase supportive relationships within communities, leading to supportive relationships on school-related matters.
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Furthermore, I learnt that if learners are applauded and praised for their hard work and dedication in schools, it can lead to them walking the extra mile in achieving more accolades (see, among others, Rytivaara & Frelin, 2017; Van Praag et al., 2017). For example, this is evident in my case where I was gifted with a dinner set by my Grade 2 teacher for obtaining position 1 in the whole class. This achievement motivated me to excel even more in my schoolwork, and many other achievements subsequently followed. It also encouraged and inspired many other learners in our class. Therefore, they worked hard on themselves and their schoolwork, and they later improved in their results. Consequently, I argue that praising and applauding learners for their quality achievements and attempts can make them eager to participate and engage in school activities. Subsequently, their academic outcomes can improve.