CHAPTER FIVE
5. CONCLUSION AND RECOMMENDATIONS
5.2. CONCLUSION
5.3.1. CONSIDERING THE IMPORTANCE OF ATTACHMENT
According to attachment theory, as pioneered by Bowlby in the 1960's, it is important that an infant develops a sense of secure attachment and belonging, in his or her interaction with their parents or caregivers. Ann McKay (2000), a clinical psychologist, stresses that children have different styles of attachment for each parent, and suggests that this could be dependent on how the parents treat them. Driven by physical and emotional changes to develop independence and confidence, it is not unusual for adolescents to among the adults and, in various ways this has to affect the children. Usually when death comes, it results in some people feeling helpless and without hope. In order to cope with the changes in the individual's life, he or she needs someone to call his or her attention to the changes, and to encourage him or her to fmd solutions to the new challenges. Phi la, struggles alone in a house with no adults in order to survive and works on week-ends in order to survive. If he had well built home or relatives who are working and living in decent homes, perhaps his situation would be better and he would be having less stress about the future.
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5.3. RECOMMENDATIONS
Considering the findings and the conclusions drawn from this study, the researcher puts forward the following recommendations which may be of interest for the department of education, department of social welfare, schools and foster families with orphans and also orphanages.
5.3.1. CONSIDERING THE IMPORTANCE OF ATTACHMENT
According to attachment theory, as pioneered by Bowlby in the 1960's, it is important that an infant develops a sense of secure attachment and belonging, in his or her interaction with their parents or caregivers. Ann McKay (2000), a clinical psychologist, stresses that children have different styles of attachment for each parent, and suggests that this could be dependent on how the parents treat them. Driven by physical and emotional changes to develop independence and confidence, it is not unusual for adolescents to
become angry and rebellious and show a great lack of trust for adults and the world. Most of the children who were interviewed especially in the orphanage, seemed to have problems communicating effectively with the adult staff members, something brought by the lack of trust after loss. While the children may have been securely attached to their mothers and fathers, after the death of these significant others, disillusionment and fear could undermine what has been achieved. Therefore, effective communication and positive relationship with orphaned adolescents from caregivers is very important. The task of re-attachment must be such that it brings about safety and security to both the caregiver and the child. For example, one girl, Khosi, mentioned that at frrst she could not call her stepmother "mom"; to her it did not feel right. It felt as if she was betraying her real mother and she felt nothing about her stepmother. But, as time went by, staying together with her stepmother has changed her attitude towards her. She now calls her
"mom" and they sometimes discuss certain issues. Unlike Phumi, her aunt is different in
the sense that there is no hope of effective communication in that home and there will be no re-attachment if attitudes do not change. That is why Phumi showed unhappiness and fear of living with her aunt. The presence of the attachment figure must bring to the child an ongoing sense of physical and psychological integrity. Care givers must be encouraged to bond with children by being given practical skills for positive parenting, and by participating in support groups. Dysfunctional attachment behaviours amongst orphans can only be understood by caregivers through training.
5.3.2. "Pre-service" training and support
Because of the extent of poverty in South Africa, some relatives fmd it very difficult to look after orphans. This calls not only for government departments to stress the become angry and rebellious and show a great lack of trust for adults and the world. Most of the children who were interviewed especially in the orphanage, seemed to have problems communicating effectively with the adult staff members, something brought by the lack of trust after loss. While the children may have been securely attached to their mothers and fathers, after the death of these significant others, disillusionment and fear could undermine what has been achieved. Therefore, effective communication and positive relationship with orphaned adolescents from caregivers is very important. The task of re-attachment must be such that it brings about safety and security to both the caregiver and the child. For example, one girl, Khosi, mentioned that at frrst she could not call her stepmother "mom"; to her it did not feel right. It felt as if she was betraying her real mother and she felt nothing about her stepmother. But, as time went by, staying together with her stepmother has changed her attitude towards her. She now calls her
"mom" and they sometimes discuss certain issues. Unlike Phumi, her aunt is different in
the sense that there is no hope of effective communication in that home and there will be no re-attachment if attitudes do not change. That is why Phumi showed unhappiness and fear of living with her aunt. The presence of the attachment figure must bring to the child an ongoing sense of physical and psychological integrity. Care givers must be encouraged to bond with children by being given practical skills for positive parenting, and by participating in support groups. Dysfunctional attachment behaviours amongst orphans can only be understood by caregivers through training.
5.3.2. "Pre-service" training and support
Because of the extent of poverty in South Africa, some relatives fmd it very difficult to look after orphans. This calls not only for government departments to stress the
responsibility of communities to care for children but also to offer responsible individuals foster grants. Concrete assistance and services need to be provided because if the children were to be formally placed with relatives and caregivers in the orphanage, caregivers would perform their duties as parents with less stress and fewer economic problems. The
"pre-service" training would also empower them to know what is expected of them and how to manage fmances so that the children feel security and acceptance. Some caregivers are really not sure of the procedures expected of them even when the children are formally placed. Since formal placement is the best option for children to be well cared for, "pre-service" training and support from social services seems advisable. One child who was placed at one of the orphanages in KwaZulu Natal said: "Here I was treated with such respect, it made me believe love can cure" (Turkington, 2002:114).
Children who are orphaned need to be loved and accepted. Pre-training services and support for foster families also can help children to adapt to new families.
5.3.3. Taking into account ethnic and cultural needs in placements.
With the extended family system of placement, it is unlikely for an orphaned child to suffer that much especially with regards to language and cultural differences. Even though it known that each and every family has its own beliefs, but in a kinship system, a child does not have to encounter many problems of adjustments. One of the advantages of kinship or extended family is that if people are thoroughly work shopped and educated, orphaned children may not loose their siblings, sense of identity, their inheritance, chances of not completing school and also risks of becoming homeless. In orphanages too, they become one family with set of rules applicable to that institution, but also education is needed to help children to adjust well and fight fears of responsibility of communities to care for children but also to offer responsible individuals foster grants. Concrete assistance and services need to be provided because if the children were to be formally placed with relatives and caregivers in the orphanage, caregivers would perform their duties as parents with less stress and fewer economic problems. The
"pre-service" training would also empower them to know what is expected of them and how to manage fmances so that the children feel security and acceptance. Some caregivers are really not sure of the procedures expected of them even when the children are formally placed. Since formal placement is the best option for children to be well cared for, "pre-service" training and support from social services seems advisable. One child who was placed at one of the orphanages in KwaZulu Natal said: "Here I was treated with such respect, it made me believe love can cure" (Turkington, 2002:114).
Children who are orphaned need to be loved and accepted. Pre-training services and support for foster families also can help children to adapt to new families.
5.3.3. Taking into account ethnic and cultural needs in placements.
With the extended family system of placement, it is unlikely for an orphaned child to suffer that much especially with regards to language and cultural differences. Even though it known that each and every family has its own beliefs, but in a kinship system, a child does not have to encounter many problems of adjustments. One of the advantages of kinship or extended family is that if people are thoroughly work shopped and educated, orphaned children may not loose their siblings, sense of identity, their inheritance, chances of not completing school and also risks of becoming homeless. In orphanages too, they become one family with set of rules applicable to that institution, but also education is needed to help children to adjust well and fight fears of
stigmatization that seemed to be a threat to most children and interfering with their self- esteem. Most children had their belief systems for example Khosi did not put on the cloth they gave to her after the death of his father. She said that at her mothers home they are Christians and were not observing traditional customs and rituals. She also believed that she will have bad luck if they were not going to cleanse her. Coming to this new family called for confusion in her beliefs and she had to make a decision what to do or follow.