6.3 Qaba-tshu [deep darkness in people of ochre] versus white-black (diversity in
6.3.1.2 Defence of a coconut (white-black positioning)
The following extracts show how the positions of coconuts have been defended by laying a claim to roots and authentic blackness.
Extract 20
Nono: it showed me that in spite of the fact that you know I‟ve so often been called a coconut (yes) ok fine so I am a coconut big deal but you know what I‟m a coconut that is proud of being black that‟s perfectly aware of my roots and where I come from (yes) but on top of being that I also have need to be proud of South Africa (mhm) you know because there needs to be a time where in spite of that we‟ve been so oppressed and suppressed (yes) we need to grow up step out of those shoes slightly (mhm) sort of like the legendary verb of queens that rose from the ashes (yes) ok we need to raise the fact that there‟s a new South Africa as well (mhm) and not everybody is racist (ja) you understand (yes) and eh at the same time never stop being proud of the fact that we‟re black.
Extract 21
Nomtha: I am a complicated black I think I live two lives that is uYvonne no Nomthandazo abantu ababini nje abangafani uYvonne unabangani abaninzi abaMhlophe [two human beings that are different Yvonne has many white friends] she goes to white parties and clubs (yes) uYvonne uhamba nebeLungu aye le nale [Yvonne goes there and
181 there with whites] you know (mhhm) kodwa uNomtha usenabangane abafana naye abamnyama and I ehm and wenza zonke ezi zinto zenziwa ngu ma ndingayibeka kanjalo (but Nomtha has black friends that are like her and she does all the things my mom does, that is how I can put it] … inkinga ngo Yvonne kukuthi ngesinye isikhathi isiZulu siyemhlula and kakhulu xa ndikwatile ndithi ndizamela ukuchazela uma something ndikhuluma isiNgesi nje [problem with Yvonne is that at times Zulu becomes difficult for her and especially when I am upset and I would try to explain something to my mom I find myself speaking English] …ehm the difference between uNomtha no Yvonne kakhulu kukuthi [more especially is to say] u Nomtha lo I feel uNomtha is more me than Yvonne (yes) Yvonne is just a person who kakhulu [most of the time ] who just tries to fit in with these people because I had to get along with them because of the sport that I do because of where I work and I work kakhulu nabo [most of the time] (mhm) Nomtha is where I feel comfortable ekhaya abantu bakithi [at home with my people] or even noma isiganga siganga [when we play games] as this little children blah (mhm) you know that‟s more of uNomtha noma siya emapatini senza loku naloku [when we go to parties we do this and that] the difference will be ma uye [when you go to] the black parties umculo like wethu ngingathini [like our music what can I say] black people turn to listen to Kwaito oomafikizolo there you know (yes) enegeze ndimamele loko xa ngihamba nabanye abangani bam babeLungu [I would not listen to that when I am with my white friends]
I: explain to me how you are dealing with these two personalities?
Nomtha: it‟s amazing that it comes like breathing its amazing at the beginning bebesho nabo ukuthi wena unabeLungu [blacks used to say I have white friends] you know but its just natural to me now to say now I am on Yvonne zone and now I am in Nomtha zone kakhulu kakhulu ekhaya uyazi ndiyazi ukuthi uNomtha qha [more especially at home she knows and I know that Nomtha only] (yes) I had to learn ngoba I had to try and balance the two different worlds cause its two different worlds both work for me they benefit me at the end of the day ngishiye ele inye ngibambe elinye [I leave this one and hold onto
182 this one ] (mhm) I am not completely I can‟t say I am completely white or coconut or I am completely black.
In extract 20 Nono is defending her position as a „white-black‟. She is a „coconut‟ laying claim to black roots and an authentic black identity based on the fact that she has suffered oppression like other black people. She transformed herself into a „white-black‟ and criticises other black people for being unable to shake off the stigma of being oppressed. She uses the term “roots” in order to position herself as an authentic black person. She constructs a hybrid black identity for herself by, on the one hand, claiming to be an authentic black person by implying that she is aware of her roots while, on the other hand, subscribing to a hybrid in-between identity – an identity that allows her to use terms like “legendary proverb” and “queen”, but she is constantly reminded of being oppressed and suppressed. In this position of concern she finds the courage to confront and challenge the hegemony in black identity. She bases this position on the changing demands of the social context and expects change in ways of thinking about black identity in society. She acknowledges that black people have been oppressed in the past but within the changing socio-political background in the new South Africa, she calls for black identity to move beyond the position constructed by the colonial past.
In a way Nono is driving black people to produce the characteristics and ideals of the dominant culture (Bhabha, 1994). Bhabha defines this kind of moment as mimicry. She seems to undermine the power of racism by blurring the boundaries between black and white. As she offers black identity some characteristics of whiteness, at the same time she announces that a pride in black identity should be retained. Nono is ambivalent about the construction of black identity and the construction of self.
In extract 21 Nomtha seems to be negotiating the tensions of being both inside and outside black identity. She is struggling between the two cultures, hence constructing an incomplete, fragmented identity that is neither white nor black, finding herself in unidentified circumstances.
On the one hand, she abandons all that constitutes her “language for English”, because after being decultured she is left with no choice but to emulate the coloniser as the sole model available to her. In this regard Fanon (1986:17) says “to speak is to exist absolutely for the
183 other”. Fanon (1986) refers to language as a cultural tool, which suggests that to speak English, as Nomtha claims, is to take on a particular culture. According to Fanon (1986), this citizenship is never more than “honorary” insofar as a racialist discourse of unchangeable biological difference ceaselessly works to seal whiteness in its whiteness and blackness in its blackness.
Nomtha makes claims of being neither a Zulu speaker nor an English speaker, as she claims to be good at neither of the two.
In this construction one sees the ambivalence Nomtha manifests as she is torn between her desire to assimilate into whiteness and her rejection of black culture, which nonetheless maintains a strong hold on her through the ties of the family primarily her mother. Her identity seems to be derived from a social context and implies fluidity and hybridity. Nomtha‟s identity is positioned somewhere between blackness and whiteness, so, instead of her former „black‟ identity in this new space, she is offered nothing: she will neither be white nor black (Bhabha, 1994). Bhabha terms this position the “third space”. Nomtha, in the third space as defined by Bhabha, constructs and reconstructs her identity as fluid not static. In the third space she is unable to claim blackness nor can she claim whiteness; she says “I leave this one and hold onto this one”. Nomtha‟s construction of her identity is contradictory and ambivalent, constructed between being a Zulu and being white.
In these positioning/constructions, the mobility and flexibility of blackness is a response to a demand of context. Openness to ambivalence and contingency is even an acknowledged virtue.