Chapter 5. A Qualitative Representation (and Explanation) of Exceptional Academic Achievement Achievement
5.2 Sikhumbuso (College of Agriculture, Engineering and Sciences)
5.2.2 Epistemic access: Feelings and grounding principles
8, 70). Although there were some other circumstances that also contributed to his resignation from this employment, Sikhumbuso realised that he needed to study in order to progress in the workplace. The transition to university study was, however, not direct or easy for Sikhumbuso.
While waiting to hear if he had been accepted for a place to study and financial aid at UKZN in 2011, he worked as a toilet cleaner at Oliver Tambo Airport (the second employment experience from his past).
So it was really difficult. I used to stay in a shack (.) 2010 and I worked at um (.) um the airport. OR Tambo, I was cleaning toilets. That was in 2010. That was not pleasant, so that also motivated me to do well at school [university]. So ja. It wasn’t easy. So there is a lot. I just take things as they come. So there is a lot. I could sit here and talk and some other things will come out you know. (Sikhumbuso, PEI 8, 585)
In addition to directly linking his unpleasant work experience to his current levels of motivation to do well at university, Sikhumbuso described how physically hard he worked at the airport, and how this has compelled him to achieve academically and progress in his future employment.
So, we had to stand there for 12 hours, it was six to six, and only get a one hour lunch. All that time you had to be standing. Standing. Ja, so eish, my feet were really (.) and if you are not used to it, but after some time, you get used to it. But you feel this is not where you want to be. It’s not where you want to be. And you get paid peanuts. What we were doing there it’s harder than studying. It’s really really (.) in terms of thinking, no, but that’s tiring on your body. It’s really difficult. But then I think that’s also helped me to respect people that are doing that job because I’ve been there now. I know, so I’m not just going to. Now when I go to the public toilet, I make sure that it’s clean, cos now I understand. (Sikhumbuso, PEI 8, 645)
I don’t know even when I’m doing maths. Not everything, some maths part is boring, but the main mathematics where you control things. You don’t just study with your mind. You also bring emotions into it. So, I think that also helps me too (.) Cos for me, I don’t just take things as they are. I talk to them. Probably why I think maths is better for me. (Sikhumbuso, PEI 8, 698)
In the above, Sikhumbuso referred to an experience of strong feelings and emotions while studying, and identified this as particularly so when he was studying mathematics. It was evident that for Sikhumbuso, the study and academic achievement process was not only a cognitive process, but also one that incorporated a strong emotive component. It was through the use of and energy created by emotions that Sikhumbuso seemed to have been able to access what was needed to excel in higher education. In elaborating on his comment in the focus group discussion where he stated, “You’re supposed to feel it (.) don’t just study to pass (.) understand it and automatically you pass. That’s what I do” (Sikhumbuso, FGD 2, 277). During the photo- elicitation interview, Sikhumbuso acknowledged the man in Photograph 5-3 as the man who once said to him, “Don’t study to pass, study to understand and automatically you will pass”
(Sikhumbuso, PEI 8, 965). Sikhumbuso went on to note,
I always have that, even now, that is my mentality. Probably that’s why I get irritated when I don’t understand. I need to understand and probably that’s why I take long when I study. Look, I study every day cos I need to understand. So this is the guy who gave me the foundation of approaching things. This is the guy who when I get stuck, in some of the problems. I go (.) and I have done some fancy stuff now (.) I go back to the basic fundamentals (.) skills when you analyse something. I just go back and study from scratch and go up. And usually I get the problems. This is the guy who told me don’t cram the formulas. Just understand the formulas. And then when you understand the formula you just know it. (Sikhumbuso, PEI 8, 972)
The man in Photograph 5-3 “… is one of those guys who (.)‘Hey, Colin.’ I know that Colin. He was not staying far from the same section I walked, probably about two minutes to where he is staying” (Sikhumbuso, PEI 8, 990). It appeared as though Colin was a man who was simply known in Sikhumbuso’s community, from whom he later sought help when experiencing some difficulties with Grade 11 mathematics. Sikhumbuso explained how he used to spend time with Colin (especially during the holidays) practising mathematics, and how he observed his marks improve during his matriculation year as a result of this.
Cos when people ask “Were you always a good student?” I would say, “No, but I just changed in matric.” Just at the end of my standard nine. But I felt like I’m in matric now I need to at least get a 70% you know. But why? Because some other people don’t. Seriously I don’t know why. I just felt it. I just felt that I needed to get a good result. (Sikhumbuso, PEI 8, 1041)
Other than feeling the need to get a good result, Sikhumbuso claimed not to know what changed in him during his matriculation year that led to his improved results in mathematics. He did, however, locate Colin as a mentor who helped him understand and apply the basic principles of mathematics, identifying these as still of use to him at that stage. In this regard, it is evident that in addition to there being a long standing and historical experience of “feel[ing] it” in relation to
Photograph 5-3. The fundamentalist; basic analysis, first principles (Sikhumbuso H3)
academic achievement endeavours, Sikhumbuso also acknowledged the role of an academic mentor in his past and current academic achievement.
Where Colin apparently instilled foundational academic skills, it was Sikhumbuso’s paternal grandmother who allegedly instilled self-discipline in him. In addition to entitling the photograph of her “My foundation”, he claimed, “She gave me principles” (Sikhumbuso, PEI 8, 409), and
I feel that I have avoided so many things. So many things because of what she has instilled in me. So now I don’t have to have someone to tell me “Don’t do this, don’t do that”. I just feel it. “No I can’t do this.” I think it’s because of what she put in me when I was growing up. So I thank her for that, cos compared to most people that I grew up with I am like the most disciplined out of them all (.) and I thank her for that. (Sikhumbuso, PEI 8, 420)
Sikhumbuso referred to an internalised sense of his grandmother, a sense that at that stage helped him make responsible decisions in his life.
When I was young, my friends used to go out, and I wanted to go out, and I really wanted to meet girls (.) you know, party and all of that. You know just chill with friends and um, when you are young you usually overdo these things. And um (.) but I couldn’t because she [his grandmother] wouldn’t allow me. (Sikhumbuso, PEI, 455)
But now I have freedom. I have (.) since I have been independent. I have been independent since the age of what 18, 19. Very early. But then that time I could have said, “Oh freedom. Now I can go party and do all those things,” but I just felt (.) It just didn’t feel good to me. (Sikhumbuso, PEI 8, 460)
In summary, Sikhumbuso’s description highlighted the presence of a strong vision for the future (especially pertaining to freedom for his mother, and opportunities for his daughter). However, this vision was grounded in an emotional awareness of the past. Sikhumbuso’s description also highlighted a process of epistemic access specific for exceptional academic achievement in higher education. His form of epistemic access appeared to have been mediated by a mentor, as well as several foundational and grounding principles of both an academic and personal nature.