PEDOMAN Persiapan “Perkawinan Katolik”

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PEDOMAN Persiapan

“Perkawinan Katolik”

Dr. Petrus Admadja, SpB

Rumah Sakit

Pondok Indah

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PERKAWINAN KATOLIK

Sabda Alkitab mengenai "Perkawinan"

Kejadian 2 : 18,21 - 24 :

18) TUHAN Allah berfirman : "Tidak baik, kalau 18) TUHAN Allah berfirman : "Tidak baik, kalau

manusia itu seorang diri saja. Aku akan manusia itu seorang diri saja. Aku akan

menjadikan penolong baginya, yang sepadan menjadikan penolong baginya, yang sepadan dengan dia."

dengan dia."

21) Lalu TUHAN Allah mernbuat manusia itu tidur 21) Lalu TUHAN Allah mernbuat manusia itu tidur

nyenyak, ketika ia tidur, TUHAN Allah mengambil nyenyak, ketika ia tidur, TUHAN Allah mengambil salah satu rusuk dari padanya, lalu menutup

salah satu rusuk dari padanya, lalu menutup tempat itu dengan daging.

tempat itu dengan daging.

22) Dan dari rusuk yang di-ambil TUHAN Allah dari 22) Dan dari rusuk yang di-ambil TUHAN Allah dari

manusia itu, dibangunNyalah seorang manusia itu, dibangunNyalah seorang

perempuan, lalu dibawaNya kepada manusia itu. perempuan, lalu dibawaNya kepada manusia itu. 23) Lalu berkatalah manusia itu: "Inilah dia, tulang 23) Lalu berkatalah manusia itu: "Inilah dia, tulang dari tulangku dan daging dari dagingku.la akan dari tulangku dan daging dari dagingku.la akan dinamai perempuan, sebab ia diambil dari dinamai perempuan, sebab ia diambil dari laki-laki."

laki."

24) Sebab itu seorang laki-laki akan meninggalkan 24) Sebab itu seorang laki-laki akan meninggalkan

ayahnya dan ibunya dan bersatu dengan istrinya, ayahnya dan ibunya dan bersatu dengan istrinya, sehingga keduanya menjadi satu daging.

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Matius 19 :3 - 6:

3) Maka datanglah orang-orang Farisi kepadaNya untuk mencobai

Dia.Mereka bertanya:

"Apakah diperbolehkan orang

menceraikan istrinya dengan alasan apa saja?"

4) Jawab Yesus: "Tidakkah kamu baca, bahwa IA yang

menciptakan manusia sejak semula menjadikan mereka

laki-laki dan perempuan?

laki dan perempuan?

5) Dan firmanNya: Sebab itu laki-laki akan meninggalkan ayah

dan ibunya dan bersatu dengan istrinya, sehingga keduanya itu

menjadi satu daging.

6) Demikianlah mereka bukan lagi dua, melainkan satu. Karena itu,

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Perkawinan itu apa ?

Menurut

Konsili Vatikan II

(Dekrit "Gaudium et Spes"

no 48),

perkawinan

ialah :



Persatuan Hidup dan Persatuan Cinta, yang menuntut

_{Persatuan Hidup dan Persatuan Cinta, yang menuntut}

kesetiaan

(artinya, tak terceraikan) dan menuntut kesatuan (Kej 2 : 24).



_{Dia "didirikan" oleh Allah dan diatur dengan hukum Ilahi}

(Mat. 19 : 4 - 6).



_{Dia merupakan "kontrak" perjanjian :}



_{Dia merupakan "lembaga" yang abadi, menurut kehendak}

Allah (Mat. 19 : 4 - 6) dan manusia.



_{Dan Dia dianugerahi dengan "kebaikan-kebaikan" yang harus}

dijaga dan dianugerahi dengan "tujuan-tujuan" tertentu yang

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Menurut Undang-Undang Perkawinan R.I. 1974,

Bab I pasal 1,

perkawinan ialah:



_{Ikatan lahir batin}



Antara seorang pria dan seorang wanita (Mat. 19:4-6).

_{Antara seorang pria dan seorang wanita (Mat. 19:4-6).}



_{Sebagai suami istri (Kej 2 : 24).}



Dengan tujuan membentuk keluarga bahagia

_{Dengan tujuan membentuk keluarga bahagia}



_{Dan kekal sifatnya (Mat. 19:4-6).}

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Perkawinan dilakukan dengan persetujuan pribadi yang bebas

1. Tanpa paksaan, artinya :

- tanpa paksaan orang lain

- tanpa paksaan situasi,

- tanpa terdorong nafsu sex,

- tanpa paksaan kemiskinannya, dsb.

2. Bebas, berarti, dilaksanakan secara TAHU dan MAU :

- Tahu, artinya punya Rasio, bisa memakainya, waras

pikirannya, sudah dewasa, mengetahui sifat-sifat

perkawinan yang sejati.

- Mau, artinya tulus, jujur, bebas, tanpa paksaan apapun.

3. Kasus : kalau “pemudi hamil dahulu”.

Selidikilah pertama-tama, apakah ada Cinta, apa secara tahu dan mau.

Kalau tidak

ada, tidak boleh dikawinkan.

Sebab untuk sahnya perkawinan dituntut Cinta dan

Tahu - Mau (tetapi tentu saja si pria yang menghamilinya itu tetap harus

mempertanggung-jawabkan perbuatannya : ganti rugi, menjamin kehidupan si

pemudi,mensahkan anaknya dan menjamin kehidupan anak itu seumur hidup).

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Kapan suatu perkawinan itu sah ?

1. Menurut

Gereja Katolik

, perkawinan

itu

baru sah kalau:

- Ada persetujuan bebas

- Tidak ada ikatan lain, misalnya :

sudah

beristri, terikat sumpah sebagai

pastor/suster.

- Tidak ada halangan yang

"membatalkan"

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Sex Education

&

family planning

Dr. Petrus Admadja, SpB

R S. PONDOK INDAH

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Natural Family Planning



Natural family planning is a way to help

a couple determine when sexual

intercourse can and cannot result in

pregnancy.



Natural family planning refers to

methods of avoiding (or achieving)

pregnancy that cooperate with a

couple's fertility rather than suppress it

through the use of drugs or

contraceptive devices.

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Natural family planning methods

Many couples choose a natural method because of religious

or personal beliefs. Some natural family planning methods

are as follows:



Abstinence

_Abstinence

Abstinence, or the avoidance of sexual intercourse, is the only

fully effective way to prevent pregnancy.



Withdrawal, or coitus interruptus

_{Withdrawal, or coitus interruptus}

.

_.

The penis is withdrawn from the

vagina before the male ejaculates. This method has a high failure

rate because sperm may enter the vagina before the penis is

removed.



Douching after sex

_{Douching after sex}

.

_.

This involves flushing the vagina with a liquid.

This method is not very effective. Many sperm continue up to the

ovary and can fertilize the egg.



The rhythm method.

_{The rhythm method}

.

This means a woman avoids sex during the

middle of her

middle of her menstrual cycle

menstrual cycle

. This method has a high failure rate.

It should only be used by women who have regular, predictable

cycles

.



Breastfeeding

_{Breastfeeding}

.

_.

This method is not entirely reliable in preventing

_{This method is not entirely reliable in preventing}

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What is ovulation?

When a young woman reaches puberty, she begins to ovulate -- a

process in which a mature egg cell (also called an ovum), ready for

fertilization by a sperm cell, is released from one of the ovaries (two

female reproductive organs located in the pelvis)

If the egg does not become fertilized as it travels down the fallopian

tube on its way to the uterus, the endometrium (lining of the uterus) is

shed and passes through the vagina (the passageway through which

fluid passes out of the body during menstrual periods; also called the

birth canal), a process called menstruation.

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What is menstruation?

Menstruation is one part of a woman's menstrual cycle which

includes the shedding of the endometrium (lining of the uterus) that

occurs throughout a woman's reproductive life.

When does menstruation begin?

On average, menarche (a young woman's first menstrual period)

occurs between the ages of 12 and 14 years old - generally two

years after her breast budding (average age 10 to 12 years old), and,

in most cases, not long after the onset of pubic hair (average age 12

years old) and underarm hair.

How long is a menstrual cycle?

For menstruating women, an average menstrual cycle lasts 28 days -

starting with the first day of the last period (which, on average, lasts

six days, with some women having a very light flow and others

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Ovulation Prediction Methods



Basal Body Temperature Method

_{Basal Body Temperature Method}

(BBT)



This method is useful to confirm that a

_{This method is useful to confirm that a}

woman is ovulating each month and by

recording her temperature on a chart over

several months she can begin to predict

when the most fertile days of her cycle are

going to be, which is of course necessary

for couples either trying to obtain, or trying

to avoid, pregnancy.



Fertility Indicator uses your body

_{Fertility Indicator uses your body}

temperature and your cycle length to

predict when you will be most

fertile



Viscosity of Vaginal Fluids

_{Viscosity of Vaginal Fluids}



This method involves checking the mucus

_{This method involves checking the mucus}

secreted by your vagina every day. Some

women may be aware of this method if

they have previously been interested in

natural family planning.

(16)

When it comes to

sex education

,

and whether adolescents

become sexually active,

parental guidance is most

influential when it delivered

with warmth, openness, and

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 the external andthe external and

 internal male reproductive internal male reproductive

and

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On the outside

, there are

five major things

you can see:



the glans or head,



the corona,



the frenum,



the urethral meatus, and



the shaft.

For uncircumcised men,there is a sixth,

The

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Go get yourself a mirror,

make sure you have some

real privacy (or at least a

door that locks) and use

some quality time to get

to know your body and

yourself. We'll just look at

what you can see and

feel, to get you started.

Sit with your panties off,

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The proper name for the outer female

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Am I still a virgin

if I had oral

sex, or if someone fingered me?

I haven't had intercourse, so my

hymen is still not broken, right?

Can my partner tell if I'm a

virgin?

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The presence or absence of a hymen in no way indicates a girl's virginal state.

No one can determine by physical examination alone whether a woman or teen has

engaged in vaginal intercourse. Only about 50% of teens and women experience

bleeding the first time they have intercourse, so blood stained bed sheets are not a

reliable indicator of prior virginity. The hymen of some women tear on more than one

occasion. There are even hymen that are elastic enough to permit a penis to enter

without tearing, or tear only partially. This is usually true only if the dilation first

occurs very gradually with fingers or other objects over an extended period of time.

Virginity

is a spiritual attribute, not a physical one.

The hymen does not magically disappear when something is inserted into thevagina,

it will only stretch or tear sufficiently to permit entry of whatever is being inserted.

If for example, a teen inserts two fingers into her vagina while masturbating, her

hymen may still tear when she has vaginal intercourse for the first time, since the

average penis is larger than her two fingers. A woman who has had vaginal

intercourse may still have hymeneal tissue present; this remaining tissue can be the

cause of pain during intercourse. If a woman's current partner has a larger penis than

her prior partners, or a couple tries a new technique or position during intercourse,

her hymen may tear again, or for the first time. When doctors examine preadolescent

and adolescent girls for evidence of sexual abuse, they look for injuries to the hymen;

the hymen may still be intact except for a single tear.

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Female Ejaculation

For the last 100 years people thought only men ejaculated.

Actually 10% of women in the U.S. do ejaculate upon reaching

an orgasm! The G-spot has been identified as the "trigger" for

ejaculatory fluid.

On average women have more sexual spasms than men during orgasm. A

man's ejaculation lasts approximately 10 seconds and most of the semen is

expelled after 5 or 6 thrusts of the pelvis. Each contraction takes slightly

less than one second. On average, female orgasms last 10 to 15 seconds but

are capable of lasting up to one minute. Healthy women will have about 8

to 12 vaginal contractions for an intense orgasm. There can be 3 to 5

contractions for a mild orgasm or for a woman of older age.

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Need to check out what

your sexually

transmitted disease or

infection risk might be

in a jiffy?

Based on any ONE instance of the following, you

may have been at risk for transmitting (giving to

someone else) or contracting (getting it yourself) the

following diseases or infections:

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Unprotected vaginal or anal intercourse, or

vaginal intercourse with a condom that has

also been used for anal intercourse:

Bacterial Vaginosis

Chlamydia

Cytomegalovirus

(CMV)

Gonorrhea

Hepatitis B

Herpes Simplex

Human Immunodeficiency Virus

(HIV)

Human Papilloma Virus

(HPV, Warts)

Pelvic Inflammatory Disease

(PID)

Pubic Lice

Scabies

Syphilis

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Unprotected oral sex:

("blow job," "giving head," "going down,“

"rimming,")

Cytomegalovirus

(CMV)

Gonorrhea

Hepatitis B

Herpes Simplex

Human Immunodeficiency Virus

(HIV)

Human Papilloma Virus

(HPV, Warts)

Syphilis

Unprotected manual sex:

("hand job," or "fingering")

Bacterial Vaginosis

Cytomegalovirus

(CMV)

Herpes Simplex

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"Thank you, safe sex."

"Here are some of the results of 25 years of addressing

this problem with the "safe sex" ideology:

Ten percent of all 15 to 19 year-old females become

pregnant each year.

More than 80 percent of pregnant girls under age 17 who

give birth and keep their babies end up on welfare,

costing society a staggering $21 billion a year.

Three million new cases of STDs among teens are

reported each year.

Up to 29 percent of sexually active adolescent girls have

been found to be infected with chlamydia.

(39)

birth control

(contraception, family planning)

Definition

Birth control refers to a

conscious decision that

sexually active couples make

to prevent unwanted

pregnancy

. The decision may

result from personal

situations or medical

conditions.

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Traditional barrier methods

Barrier methods use physical or chemical blocks to keep sperm

from fertilizing the woman's egg. These methods include the

following:



_{Condoms, or synthetic sheaths.}

Male condoms

cover the penis and keep

semen from going into the vagina.

Female condoms

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cover the external

genitals and the walls of the vagina.



_Spermicides

_{. These are chemicals that}

kill the sperm in the vagina. They come

in the form of jellies, foams, creams,

films, or suppositories.



_{A diaphragm. This is a flexible rubber}

cap that is placed inside

the vagina.



_{A cervical cap. This is smaller than a}

diaphragm and covers the cervix.

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Hormones

Combinations of female hormones can be used to prevent

pregnancy. These combinations include:



_{oral contraceptives}

_{, or birth control pills, which prevent ovulation}



progestin-only birth control pills, or minipills, which do not have

_{progestin-only birth control pills, or minipills, which do not have}

estrogen



_{progestin implants, which are small plastic rods that are placed}

beneath the skin to supply small daily doses of hormones



injections of synthetic progestins, which are hormones given every

_{injections of synthetic progestins, which are hormones given every}

3 months

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Intrauterine devices

Intrauterine devices, or IUDs, are placed in the uterus. They

keep the fertilized egg from being implanted. IUDs have been

linked with an increased risk of

sexually transmitted disease

.

They can also increase the risk for pregnancy outside the

uterus, or

ectopic

pregnancy.

Sterilization

Surgery can be performed on a man or woman to prevent pregnancy. A Surgery can be performed on a man or woman to prevent pregnancy. A vasectomy

vasectomy in a male involves cutting and tying off the tubes that carry sperm. in a male involves cutting and tying off the tubes that carry sperm. A tubal ligation in a woman involves cutting and tying off the fallopian tubes. A tubal ligation in a woman involves cutting and tying off the fallopian tubes. Surgical removal of the uterus, or

Surgical removal of the uterus, or hysterectomy, also causes hysterectomy, also causes sterilization. sterilization.

Emergency contraception

Emergency contraceptionEmergency contraception means birth means birth control that is given after unprotected control that is given after unprotected intercourse has taken place. Hormones can be given over a 24-hour period, intercourse has taken place. Hormones can be given over a 24-hour period, within 72 hours of the unprotected sex. Another method uses an

within 72 hours of the unprotected sex. Another method uses an intrauterine device

intrauterine device, or IUD. This is placed into the woman's uterus within 5 , or IUD. This is placed into the woman's uterus within 5 days after unprotected sex.

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 Keep God FIRST!_{Keep God FIRST!}  Pray Together!_{Pray Together!}

 Respect and honor each other!_{Respect and honor each other!}

 _{Encourage each other to grow together!}_{Encourage each other to grow together!}

 _{Read the Bible together as much as possible!}_{Read the Bible together as much as possible!}  Be swift to hear & slow to speak! _{Be swift to hear & slow to speak!}

 Make time to communicate with each other! _{Make time to communicate with each other!}  Protect and honor your marriage vows! _{Protect and honor your marriage vows!}

 _{Do not let others come between your marriage!}_{Do not let others come between your marriage!}

 _{Have a "Mission Statement" for your Marriage&Family!}_{Have a "Mission Statement" for your Marriage&Family!}  Thank God everyday for your Mate & the Life you have _{Thank God everyday for your Mate & the Life you have}

together! together!

 Understand that "love" is a choice, not a feeling!(You _{Understand that "love" is a choice, not a feeling!(You}