INACCURACY PROBLEMS OF TRANSLATING ENGLISH
SINGULAR-PLURAL FORMS IN BRADMAN’S AND
CHATTERTON’S DEADLY GAME INTO PERMAINAN MAUT
AN UNDERGRADUATE THESIS
Presented as Partial Fulfillment of the Requirements for the Degree of Sarjana Sastra
in English Letters
By NOFI
Student Number: 044214013
ENGLISH LETTERS STUDY PROGRAMME DEPARTMENT OF ENGLISH LETTERS
FACULTY OF LETTERS SANATA DHARMA UNIVERSITY
INACCURACY PROBLEMS OF TRANSLATING ENGLISH
SINGULAR-PLURAL FORMS IN BRADMAN’S AND
CHATTERTON’S DEADLY GAME INTO PERMAINAN MAUT
AN UNDERGRADUATE THESIS
Presented as Partial Fulfillment of the Requirements for the Degree of Sarjana Sastra
in English Letters
By NOFI
Student Number: 044214013
ENGLISH LETTERS STUDY PROGRAMME DEPARTMENT OF ENGLISH LETTERS
FACULTY OF LETTERS SANATA DHARMA UNIVERSITY
Smile to the world,
and the world will smile back
FOR
MY BLESSED BUDDHA,
MY BELOVED PARENTS,
MY LOVELY SISTERS,
AND THOSE WHO KEEP BELIEVING
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
To begin, I would love to thank Buddha for giving me blessings to finish my thesis. This thesis would never be done without Him on my side and heart.
I would like to show my gratefulness to Sanata Dharma University for being the best place to study, to Harris Hermansyah Setiajid, S.S., M. Hum. for his patience in guiding me doing this thesis and being my interviewed, to Adventina Putranti, S.S., M.Hum. for the advices and suggestion, to all the English Letters lecturers for the willingness to improve my English skill, and to all the staffs for keeping this campus a comfort place
. To Mom, Dad, and all my sisters, Pipi, Epi, Eni, Lia, Santa and Ren-ren for giving me support, love and prayers so I can do my best. I am also very thankful to have best friends like Taini, Dita Ndutz, Disti, Rini, Indree, Lutfi, Sisca, Elin, and Pita in this campus. I hope one day we can have a picnic again. Also, I would like to thank my other friends in English Letters 2004. To my closest friends Fen-fen and Tita for the supports, to Hendra “Boy” for giving me spirit to keep moving on, to Oni for being my best cousin in happiness and sadness, and to all my friends in Palembang. I wish the best for them all.
Lastly, I would like to thank everyone whom I forgot to name. I thank them for always believing in anything that I have been doing. May God bless them all.
TABLE OF CONTENTS
4. Theories on Indonesian Singular and Plural Nouns ... 12
5. Notes on Functionalism in Translation ………...… 14
6. Notes on Thinking-Aloud Protocol ………...… 16
C. Theoretical Framework ………... 18
D. Research Framework ………...….. 19
CHAPTER III: METHODOLOGY ……….……... 20
A. Object of the Study ………...……... 20
A. The Inaccurate Translated English Singular and Plural Forms in Deadly Game and Permainan Maut ……….….. 26
1. The Inaccurate Translation of English Plural Forms …..…... 27
2. The Inaccurate Translation of English Singular Forms ……... 45
C. The Reasons of the Translator in Making Translation Shift in
Permainan Maut ...………...….. 56
CHAPTER V: CONCLUSION AND SUGGESTION ………...… 58
A. Conclusion ………...…… 58
B. Suggestion ………..……….…… 63
BIBLIOGRAPHY ………..………...… 64
APPENDICES ………..……...……. 66
Appendix 1 The Result of Questionnaire ………..……...… 66
Appendix 2 The Accumulation of Scores ………..…….……. 67
Appendix 3 The Sample of Questionnaire …....……..……...…..……… 70
ABSTRACT
NOFI. Inaccuracy Problems of Translating English Singular-Plural Forms in Bradman’s and Chatterton’s Deadly Game into Permainan Maut. Yogyakarta: Department of English Letters, Faculty of Letters, Sanata Dharma University, 2008.
Deadly Game is a novel written by Tony Bradman and Martin Chatterton which is translated into bahasa Indonesia by Harris Setiajid entitled Permainan Maut. In doing the translation work, the writer finds out that the translator tends to translate the English singular-plural forms inaccurately that can result in problems.
In this thesis, the writer is discussing three main points. First is to find out and analyze the noun forms which are translated inaccurately and offer better revisions. The second point is to find out the effects of the inaccuracy which will also be expressed by some readers. The last point is to know why the translator chooses to translate the forms inaccurately.
In order to conduct the analysis, there are three important aspects that will be used. The first is to analyze the inaccurate translated English singular and plural forms by identifying two primary data, Deadly Game and Permainan Maut. Second is to find the effects of the inaccuracy in translating English singular and plural forms which are also supported by some readers through questionnaires. The last aspect is to find out the reasons of the translator translating the English singular-plural forms inaccurately.
ABSTRAK
NOFI. Inaccuracy Problems of Translating English Singular-Plural Forms in Bradman’s and Chatterton’s Deadly Game into Permainan Maut. Yogyakarta: Jurusan Sastra Inggris, Fakultas Sastra, Universitas Sanata Dharma, 2008.
Deadly Game adalah novel yang ditulis oleh Tony Bradman dan Martin Chatterton dan diterjemahkan ke dalam bahasa Indonesia oleh Harris Setiajid dengan judul Permainan Maut. Dalam proses terjemahannya, penulis menemukan bahwa penerjemah cenderung menerjemahkan bentuk tunggal dan jamak bahasa Inggris secara tidak akurat yang menyebabkan masalah.
Dalam skripsi ini, penulis membahas tiga poin penting. Pertama adalah menemukan dan menganalisis bentuk-bentuk kata benda yang diterjemahkan secara tidak akurat dan menawarkan revisi yang baik. Poin kedua adalah untuk mengetahui dampak-dampak dari ketidakakuratan tersebut yang juga akan didukung oleh beberapa pembaca. Poin terakhir adalah untuk mengetahui alasan penerjemah memilih untuk menerjemahkan bentuk tunggal dan jamak secara tidak akurat.
Untuk melakukan semua analisis, ada tiga aspek penting yang akan dibahas. Pertama adalah menganalisa ketidakakuratan dalam menerjemahkan bentuk tunggal dan jamak bahasa Inggris melalui identifikasi data primer, Deadly Game dan Permainan Maut. Kedua adalah mengetahui dampak-dampak dari ketidakakuratan tersebut yang juga akan diungkapkan oleh pembaca melalui kuisioner. Aspek terakhir adalah mengetahui alasan-alasan penerjemah menerjemahkan secara tidak akurat bentuk tunggal dan jamak tersebut.
CHAPTER I
INTRODUCTION
A. Background of the Study
English is a world language. Most people use English almost in their everyday life. English is used mostly in communication, such as in conversation, teaching-learning process, mass media, songs, and so forth. English has also been used in literary works, especially novels.
Since many English books need to be translated, translation becomes very much helpful because most people in Indonesia do not have any skill and knowledge about other language except their mother-tongue. That is why most publishers try to make the novels sold-out by translating them into Indonesian.
Translation job is not easy. Someone must have basic knowledge about his/her own culture, the mastery of mother-tongue language, the basic knowledge about the theory of translation study, and so forth. Translation, since the first time it was known, has faced many debates. Many scientists still argue on the “real” meaning of translation.
According to Bell in his book entitled Translation and Translating: Theory and Practice, translation should cover three understandings. First is
Translation can result in problems when a translator does not concern enough on the real message of the author. One of the examples is the rise of translation shift. Translation shift is the small linguistics changes that occur between source text (ST) and target text (TT) (Catford, 1965:73). One of the main focuses of translation shift covers a change from singular into plural forms and vice versa. One of the phenomenons of the translation shift can be seen in the translation of Bradman’s and Chatterton’s Deadly Game into Permainan Maut. Here, the translator tends to translate the singular forms into plural and plural forms into singular.
One of the examples is the translation of the clause reading one of his comics into sedang membaca komik. The problem of such case is that the idea that
the author wants to say is not delivered correctly. The phrase one of his comics which is translated into komik changes in message. The author actually wants to say that Jake has many comics and he is reading one of them. In fact, the translator changes the message that Jake seems to have only one comic.
The goal of the translator is to communicate to the receptor audience the same information and the same mood as was conveyed by the original document to the original audience (Larson, 1984:421).
If there is a shift in the target text, the readers, anyway, will receive a different idea. They may simply find the story boring than what the author wants to expect from them.
The second problem is that by a shift, a translator may find that the translation work is easy because in this case he prefers choosing to shift some words rather than trying to find a relevancy in language between the word in the source text and target text. Meaning to say, the translator may consider a translation shift as his second alternative when he thinks a word will be heard awkward when it is translated into other language as what it is supposed to be.
English and Indonesian language have equivalence, especially in singular and plural forms. If for example there is a word eyes in English, by considering the equivalence to Indonesian language, it is better to say sepasang mata, instead of translating the word into its singular form mata although Indonesian people widely consider mata as plural form.
writer also identifies that it gives some effects toward the original story. That is why the writer thinks that this thesis is worth studying.
There will be some findings on the inaccuracy in translating English singular and plural forms and the effects toward its original story. In the discussion later, it will also be observed the reasons of the translator translating English singular and plural forms inaccurately.
B. Problem Formulation
In order to guide and limit the points of discussion and make the writing clear, some questions which are related to the topic have been prepared. The questions are formulated as follows.
1. What are the English singular and plural forms translated inaccurately found in the translation of Bradman’s and Chatterton’s Deadly Game into Permainan Maut?
2. How do the inaccurate English singular and plural forms affect the original story Deadly Game?
3. Why does the translator tend to translate the English singular and plural forms inaccurately in the translated novel Permainan Maut?
C. Objectives of the Study
plural forms toward the original novel Deadly Game. The last is to know the reasons why the inaccuracy in translating English singular and plural forms is made by the translator in the translated novel Permainan Maut.
D. Definition of Terms
Some words related to the research will be defined in order to help the writer analyze the topic. In this part, the writer will use some sources in order to give the most appropriate definition of the specific terms.
Translation
According to Catford in A Linguistics Theory of Translation, translation is “The replacement of textual material in one language (the source language, SL), by equivalent textual material in one language (the target language, TL).” (1965:20)
Larson states that translation consists of transferring the meaning of the source language into the target language. This is done by going from the form of the first language to the form of the second language by way of semantic structure (1984:3).
From the definitions above, it can be concluded that translation is a process in which the message of one language (source language) is transmitted into another language.
Translation Shift
Vinay and Darbelnet (in Newmark’s A Textbook of Translation, 1988) define translation shift or transposition as a translation procedure involving a change in grammar from source language into target language. What is meant by “change” include the change from singular into plural, adjective into noun, and vice versa, passive voice into active voice.
CHAPTER II
THEORETICAL REVIEW
A. Review of Related Studies
Yunita Wulansari in her undergraduate thesis entitled Translation Strategies in Overcoming Cultural Problems in Translating Mangunwijaya’s
Burung-Burung Camar into the Weavebirds discusses some cultural nouns which
exist in Indonesian culture are untranslatable. She states that there are 48 Javanese culture-bound expressions which are found in the novel, based on concrete and abstract equivalences. The concrete concepts found are names of species that are not common in the TL, types of food, location, tool, clothes, etc. The abstract concepts are calendar system in Javanese, nobility title, traditional games, art, belief and superstition, etc. (2007:57-59).
Another study is from Henny Waty in The Problems of Translating Inyik Lunak Si Tukang Cenang, Jakarta Sunyi Sekali di Malam Hari, and Mata Yang
Indah in the Anthology Mata yang Indah. She discusses the difficulties in
translating some words in Indonesian culture which do not have equivalent in English. Some words which are close to the Indonesian culture, e.g. gembong, lepau, oplet, muhrim, dangdut and malam lebaran do not have the equivalent in
in expressive meaning, semantically complex, the lack of the target background, and omission of words or idea (2004: 64-67).
From the review of studies above, it can be clearly seen that the above writers are discussing a similar topic, that is the difficulties of translating cultural terms in Indonesian language. While in this thesis, the writer discusses the inaccuracy in translating English singular and plural forms into Indonesian that can give effects to the original story.
B. Review of Related Theories
1. Translation Shift
Catford in his book entitled A Linguistics Theory of Translation states that the small linguistics changes that occur between source text and target text is called translation shift (1965:73).
The term “translation shifts” means “departures from formal correspondence in the process of going from the source language (SL) to the target language (TL). A shift is said to occur if, in a given TT, a translation equivalent other than the formal correspondent occurs for a specific SL element.
Catford states that there are two major types of translation shifts. They are level shifts and category shifts. By a shift of level we mean that an SL item at one linguistic level has a TL translation equivalent at a different level.
Tou in A Step into Translatics mentions four major types of category shift (2003:7).
1. Structure (order) shift
ST : A white house modifier + headword TT :Rumah putih headword + modifier 2. Class shift
ST : Medical faculty adjective + noun TT : Fakultas kedokteran noun + noun 3. Unit shift
ST : A thinking person word as modifier + headword TT : Orang yang berpikir headword + clause as modifier 4. Intra-system shift
ST : Many teachers modifier + plural noun TT : Banyak guru modifier + singular noun
2. Translation Process
Nababan in Teori Menerjemah Bahasa Inggris defines a process of translation as the activities which are done by a translator when he/she transmits a message from a source language (SL) into a target language (TL) (1999:24).
The process of translation consists of three phases which are (1) analyzing the SL, (2) transmitting the message, and (3) restructuring.
linguistics and the extra linguistics elements. Linguistics elements are the language elements such as sentence pattern, clause, phrase, word, etc., while extra linguistics elements consist of elements outside the language, that is the socio-cultural of the SL.
After understanding the meaning and the structure of the SL, a translator can know the message of the text. The next step is to transmit the message into the TL. In this phase, a translator has to find the equivalent word between SL and TL. This process is also known as mental process because it occurs in the translator’s mind. After that, the translator transmits the message into the TL orally or written.
The last phase is restructuring. It is a process in which a translator must pay attention to the language of TL to find the accurate information with the SL. Also, he/she has to pay attention to the target readers of the translated text.
Bell in Translation and Translating: Theory and Practice draws the process of translation as follows.
Memory Source language
text Analysis
Semantic representation
Synthesis Target language
text
The model shows the transformation of an SL text into TL text by means of processes which take place within memory: (1) the analysis of one language-specific text (the SL text) into a universal (non-language-language-specific text) semantic representation, and (2) the synthesis of the semantic representation into a second language-specific text (the TL text) (1991:21).
3. Theories on English Singular and Plural Nouns
Murphy in English Grammar In Use summarizes some rules on the use of singular and plural form (1985:156).
i. We use some nouns only in the plural, e.g.: trousers jeans shorts
ii. We don’t often use the plural of person (‘persons’). Instead we use people. iii. These nouns end in –s but they are not usually plural:
mathematics physics news
iv. Some singular nouns are often used with a plural verb: government family audience
v. Sometimes we use a plural noun with a singular verb. We do this when we talk about sum of money, a period of time, a distance:
five thousand pounds
Leech and Svartvik in A Communicative Grammar of English also state some points on singular and plural use (1975:252).
i. the nouns which are singular are:
(b) Mass nouns, e.g. advertising, music. (c) Proper nouns, e.g. Mars, the Thames.
The only nouns which normally occur in the plural are plural count nouns, i.e. nouns denoting ‘more than one’, e.g. two boys, the tables.
ii. The regular plural is formed by adding –s or –es to the singular. But special mention must be made of:
(a) some nouns which end in –s but are singular, e.g. news, names of diseases (measles, mumps); subject names in –ics (classics, linguistics), some games (billiards, dominos), some proper nouns
(Athens, Brussels).
(b) Some nouns which occur only in the plural, e.g. cattle, people, police, the Middle Ages.
4. Theories on Indonesian Singular and Plural Nouns
According to Effendi in Panduan Berbahasa Indonesia dengan Baik dan Benar, Indonesian language does not use any affix to express plural forms.
Reduplication is one marker to express plurality (1995:115-119).
(1) Kegiatan-kegiatan itu bermanfaat bagi pembinaan minat baca masyarakat.
(2) Para pelajar diberi kesempatan mengikuti kursus-kursus itu.
in the words kapal-kapal and ships in English form (Oplt, 1966:263). If the reduplication words are deleted becoming kegiatan and kursus, the plural meaning will lose and singular meaning will arise (Effendi, 1995: 116).
Sometimes reduplication is not used to express plurality. Some words describing plural form can be used before the noun without any reduplication.
(3) Para pengarang menolak gagasan seperti itu. (4) Banyak rumah yang hancur dilanda lahar panas. (5) Berapa pertanyaan yang dikemukakan guru itu? (6) Tidak semua kegiatan dilakukannya dengan baik. (7) Berbagai masalah didiskusikan dalam pertemuan itu.
The words pengarang in (3), rumah in (4), pertanyaan in (5), kegiatan in (6), and masalah in (7) are not reduplicated, but each expresses plurality because those words are preceded by words related to numbers, those are para, banyak, berapa, semua, and berbagai.
(8) Pabrik yang besar-besar telah dibangun di negara itu.
(9) Bermacam-macam buku yang dipamerkan dalam pameran itu.
The words pabrik in (8) and buku in (9) express plurality although they do not reduplicate. This is because these words are followed by other reduplicated words besar-besar and bermacam-macam. Sometimes there are words in Indonesian language which are in singular form but meaning plural, as in (10) and (11).
(10) Rakyat berjuang mempertahankan kemerdekaan.
Oplt states that sometimes reduplication can appear with the addition of the suffix –an to express collective terms.
buah (fruit) buah-buahan (fruits)
daun (leaf) daun-daunan (leaves)
Some nouns, when fully reduplicated, change their meaning although sometimes the meaning is similar or related.
mata (eyes) langit (sky)
mata-mata (spy) langit-langit (palate)
5. Notes on Functionalism in Translation
According to Chosefu, one of the most recent developments in translation theory is the emergence of “Functionalist” approaches to translation. These
approaches emphasize the purpose or the function for which a translation is needed as
the main criterion that determines how a translation is to be done
(http://academic.sun.ac.za).
However, the translator’s role is considered as very crucial in the translation process, because he or she is ostensibly the expert in the translation and should be responsible for ensuring that the assignment given in the translation brief is done satisfactorily. Nord explains that the translator studies the translation brief and gives advice regarding the viability of the translation in view of the specifications given in the client. The other point raised by Nord is that whereas the translation brief specifies what kind of translation is needed, this brief has to be negotiated between the client and the translator. Nord also states that translators are not obliged to meet all the demands of the clients, but they have a moral responsibility not to deceive them. Therefore the translator is required to be loyal to the specifications of the client without violating the original intentions of the source text (ST) author.
Nord, therefore, places an emphasis on two things: the client’s specifications in the translation brief and the need for the translator to maintain loyalty to both the client and the author of the ST. That is what constitutes the “function-plus-loyalty” model.
Nord’s functionalist model implies that acceptability of a mother tongue
translation can be achieved if the translator harmonizes the desired functions of the
target text with the original communicative functions of the source text. Nord’s
functionalist model also implies that a translation that is done with total disregard of
the expectations of the target language community may be irrelevant to the actual
6. Notes on Thinking-Aloud Protocol
Campbell in Translation into the Second Language states the definition on TAP procedure.
By psychological modelling of the translation process, I mean attempts to infer mental constructs from empirical data. This could be done by mapping the inferred mental constructs in translators of different levels of ability, or longitudinally in student translators (1998:6).
Another definition comes from Dancette in Comprehension in the Translation Process: An Analysis of Thinking-Aloud Protocol collected in
Dollerup and Lindegaard’s Teaching Translation and Interpreting 2.
When dealing with protocols, it is necessary to be aware of the fact that protocols, even when they are combined with questionnaires and interviews, are only a posteriori and clumsy and possibly false justification for a performance (1994:120).
As stated by Hom in Thinking Aloud Protocol that although the main benefit of TAP is a better understanding of the user's mental model and interaction with the product, other benefits can be gained as well. For example, the terminology the user uses to express an idea or function should be incorporated into the product design or at least its documentation (jthom.best.vwh.net /usability/thnkalod.htm).
A paper entitled Using Protocol Analysis to Explore the Creative Requirements Engineering Process states that there are two kinds of approaches to
Concurrent protocols are generated when the problem solver verbalizes their thoughts while working on a specific task. First, the problem solver is trained to verbalize his or her thoughts using a thinking aloud technique. Second, with a given task, the problem solver verbalizes his or her thoughts while working on a given task. The process is video and/or audio taped, and transcribed. As a result, a thinking-aloud concurrent protocol acts as the generator of the data source, which is then later coded and analyzed.
Retrospective protocols conduct interviews with the problem solver after the problem solving process, usually immediately. During the interview, the problem solver is asked to recall his or her activities. Interviews are audio and/or videotaped and transcribed. The generated retrospective protocols serve as data for later coding and analysis to reconstruct the problem solving process and gain insight into what happened during the process.
According to Ruuskanen in Creating the ‘Other’: A Pragmatic Translation Tool in Nababan’s Arah Penelitian Penerjemahan, generally a
professional translator already has a description about the target text readers, and sometimes when interviewed or asked to fill a questionnaire, there is a possibility that some things which are expressed by the translator are different from what he did when doing a translation work (http://iasiuns.blogspot.com).
C. Theoretical Framework
explained. Theories on translation shift, translation process, theories on English singular and plural nouns and theories on Indonesian singular and plural nouns are to answer the first question. The first theory discusses the explanation and the types of shift in translation. The second theory describes the process of translating an SL text into TL text. The third and the fourth theories explain the basic rules and usage of English singular and plural form and Indonesian singular and plural nouns.
The second question is dealt with the effects of the inaccuracy in translating English singular and plural form into Indonesian. The previous analysis is needed in answering the question. Also, as a supportive data, the writer needs the opinions of some readers whether they consider Permainan Maut is accurate or not regarding the singular-plural forms. That is why some notes on functionalism in translation are used. It is used as guidance to get the reaction of the readers and to know their comments about the inaccuracy data through questionnaire, how it gives effect toward the original story.
D. Research Framework
To make clear the steps and the goal of this thesis, the writer has provided a diagram to describe the flow of the research.
Meaning shift Translation shift Accurate/inaccurate
Effects of inaccuracy TT
Permainan Maut
Translator
ST Deadly Game
Data compilation STplural → TTsingular STsingular→ TTplural
Inaccuracy analysis
Readers:
R1= English lecturer in Sanata Dharma University R2= English lecturer in Duta
Wacana Christian University R3+R4= English Letters students R5= English instructor in Adista
Aviation Training Center
CHAPTER III
METHODOLOGY
A. Object of the Study
Since the thesis is trying to identify the inaccuracy in translating English singular and plural forms, to find the effects of the inaccuracy toward its original story, and to know the reasons why the translator tends to make the inaccuracy, the data needed are the source novel Deadly Game which is written by Tony Bradman and Martin Chatterton and the translated version Permainan Maut by Harris Setiajid.
The writer uses a short story by Tony Bradman and Martin Chatterton entitled Deadly Game. This novel consists of 105 pages, and is published by Egmont Books Limited, London in 2004. The Indonesian version Permainan Maut is translated by Harris Hermansyah Setiajid and published by Kanisius
Yogyakarta in 2004.
B. Method of the Study
The thesis will use three data sources which cover three aspects. The first aspect is the identification of the inaccuracy in translating English singular and plural forms in both novels. In this aspect, the writer is positioned as a linguist in which the analysis will be segmental. The first aspect will also help the writer to find the effects that arise. To support the argument, the second aspect, that is conducting a questionnaire distribution, is used to summarize the general effects of the inaccuracy problems toward its original story stated by the readers. The last aspect includes an interview with the translator to find out the reasons of the inaccuracy in translating English singular and plural forms.
C. Research Procedure
1. Data Source
To support the writer in answering the questions which were formulated, there would be three main sources that were used in this thesis.
The second source was considered as a supportive source. It was used to show that some readers also found the different meaning between Deadly Game and Permainan Maut. The main concern of this source was the readers of both novels. In applying this source, the writer would have 5 respondents. These five respondents were enough for the writer to gain any opinions and arguments which expressed agreement or disagreement with the writer. The respondents should be bilingual (mastering English and Indonesian language) since the thesis was discussing two languages and to help them easier understand both stories and find the differences between the stories in terms of singular and plural nouns. They were asked to fill the questionnaires that had been prepared by the writer. The respondents came from different backgrounds of education.
The first respondent (R1) is a translation expert. She is a lecturer of English Letters in Sanata Dharma University Yogyakarta. Graduating from Ohio State University for being a master, she ever translated a novel of the same authors of Deadly Game entitled Final Cut which was also published by Kanisius Yogyakarta.
The second respondent (R2) is an English lecturer. She is teaching in Duta Wacana Christian University Yogyakarta. She is also the head of English Learning Practice Program in the university.
paper. The second student (R4) is one of the smartest students in 2004 class. She ever received a Faculty Award of getting the highest GPA in the year 2006-2007.
The last respondent (R5) is an English instructor in AATC (Adista Aviation Training Center). She is a Master of Management graduated from Indonesia Islamic University.
The main object of the third source was the translator of Bradman and Chatterton’s Deadly Game. He is a lecturer of linguistics in Sanata Dharma University. He is also one of translation lecturers.
2. Data Collection
As the first object of the study was identifying the inaccuracy in translating English singular and plural forms, the procedure of the research would be documenting, that is analyzing the short story and identifying the translated novel.
To collect the data, there were two kinds of procedures that the writer did. First of all, the writer read the story in order to have better understanding of the story itself and to find English singular and plural forms used in it. The analysis aimed to know the types of nouns that were used; whether they were singular or plural. After collecting, the writer made a list of the noun numbers.
In answering the second problem, the writer still used the analysis in previous problems. As a comparative and supportive data, the writer would conduct a questionnaire distribution to some reliable respondents to get the opinions of the readers. The writer distributed the data which contained the inaccuracy in translating English singular and plural forms in Bradman’s and Chatterton’s Deadly Game to some readers. The next step was to distribute some questions which the writer had prepared related to the effects of the inaccuracy. The last step was to conclude the opinion of the readers.
To answer the third problem, the writer would conduct an interview with the translator. After finished reading a reference book as guidance, the writer prepared some proportional questions. This method would be an exclusive interview with the translator. In this method, the writer would also show some examples of the translation results to the translator. This way would be very important to support asking some other related questions that had been prepared. A recorder would also be used to help the writer remind the answers and as a factual proof.
3. Data Analysis
they were singular or plural based on the theories by Murphy, Leech and Svartvik. The last step was to classify the nouns based on their types.
The similar steps were also done for the target text Permainan Maut. The writer read the novel and classified the nouns whether they were singular or plural based on the theories by Effendi and Oplt. Then, the writer made a list of the nouns which were translated from the source text. The next step was to find out whether the forms were translated accurately or not by comparing both novels. The final step was to analyze the forms and to find out the better translation.
In answering the second question, the writer did two steps. The first step was an individual argument on the effects of the inaccuracy problems gained from previous analysis. As a supportive data, the writer would jump into the second step in which the writer would use the questionnaires that had been distributed to some readers. From the questionnaires, the writer read the answers and divided the respondents who agreed that the source text, regarding the singular-plural forms, was accurately translated and respondents who agreed that the source text was translated inaccurately. The last step was to write down the opinions of the respondents in the analysis.
CHAPTER IV
ANALYSIS
In this chapter, the writer will analyze the topic by answering the research questions previously written in the problem formulation. There are three major divisions of discussion, and each will represent the answer of each question. A. The Inaccurate Translated English Singular and Plural Forms in Deadly
Game and Permainan Maut
There are 39 phrases and clauses containing singular and plural forms that are translated inaccurately which are found in Bradman’s and Chatterton’s Deadly Game and Permainan Maut. Those 39 phrases and clauses will be discussed one
by one. There will be two subdivisions in discussing the inaccurate translated singular and plural forms.
In answering the first problem, the writer provides a scoring system based on Nababan’s accuracy indicator and accuracy category with modification in Strategi Penilaian Kualitas Terjemahan collected in Jurnal Linguistik Bahasa
(2004:54-65).
Score Accuracy Indicator
1 The content of the ST is conveyed accurately to the TT. The sentences can be understood clearly. Rewriting is not needed
2 The content of the ST is conveyed accurately to the TT. The sentences can be understood clearly, but a little restructuring and rewriting are needed.
elements. Some restructuring and rewriting are needed.
4 Some ST sentences are not translated into TT. Deliberately omitted. The TT content is different from ST.
Score Accuracy Category
1 Accurate translation
2 Quite accurate
3 Not accurate
4 Inaccurate
1. The Inaccurate Translation of English Plural Forms
The first analysis lies on the inaccuracy in translating plural forms into singular in Deadly Game and Permainan Maut. There are 31 phrases and clauses that are found translated inaccurately. In the analysis, the writer also provides the source text and target text that contain the inaccuracy.
No. Source Text Target Text 1. …, reading one of his comics for
the umpteenth time,…
…, sedang membaca komik. Komik itu telah ia baca untuk kesekian kalinya.
The above sentence is said to be inaccurately translated seen from the phrase one of his comics which is translated into komik. The translator changes the meaning of the phrase because the phrase one of his comics shows that Jake has many comics and he is reading one of them, while the translator means to say that Jake has only one comic and he is reading it. The existence of the plural form one of his comics also describes the characteristics of Jakes in which he prefers
The above data is given a score 3 because the translator adds a sentence to the target text, Komik itu telah ia baca untuk kesekian kalinya, beside inaccurately translates the phrase one of his comics into komiknya. The better translation is sedang membaca salah satu koleksi komiknya untuk kesekian kalinya.
2. .., keeping his head to shield his eyes from the bright morning sunshine.
Kepalanya menunduk untuk
menghindari sinar matahari pagi,…
The next inaccuracy is seen from the sentence above. The score 4 is given in consideration that the verb to shield his eyes is deliberately omitted. In the source text, it is clearly said that Jake is protecting his eyes from the sunshine. The translator in the target text, in other way, is simply saying that Jake is trying to hide from the sunshine. The translator obviously deletes the phrase his eyes. Normally, part of the body that a human wants to protect from sunshine is eyes, it is better to translate the source text into kepalanya menunduk untuk melindungi kedua matanya dari silau matahari pagi.
3. …, doors being opened and closed, footsteps, his parents’ voices calling.
…, pintu yang dibuka kemudian ditutup, langkah-langkah kaki, dan suara ayah dan ibunya memanggil-manggil namanya.
memanggil-manggil that follows the word suara represents plural form. To
appreciate the author’s idea, it is better to translate the inaccurate noun doors into pintu-pintu.
4. The words are muffled,… Suaranya tidak begitu jelas,…
The next case is the translation of the words into suaranya. It is obviously different in meaning because the author means to say that Jake cannot clearly listen what his parents are talking about. Jake knows that his parents are talking about something, but he cannot clearly listen what it is about. If it is translated into suaranya, it means that Jake can hear what his parents are talking about, the problem is that their voices are disturbed by other voice. In other word, it is obviously seen that the content in the source text is not conveyed accurately to the target text in which the translator is in difficulty to find the most appropriate translation for the word the words which also means that the translation above is given a 3. To make it good, the sentence kata-katanya tidak begitu jelas will sound suitable.
5. The bench is hard to see from the bedrooms and the kitchen
window.
Bangku yang didudukinya terletak agak tersembunyi di belakang, tidak kelihatan dari kamar tidur atau jendela dapur pondok.
There are two problems which make the sentence is given a 3. The first case is the inaccurate translation bedrooms into kamar tidur. It is also included as a small case because the meaning is not wholly different. In this case, if the word bedrooms is translated into kamar tidur, it seems that the bench is hardly seen
somewhere in the garden and it is hardly seen from every side of the house. The better translation will be seluruh kamar tidur.
The second problem lies on the addition of the information. The inappropriate addition is Bangku yang didudukinya terletak agak tersembunyi di belakang. Considering the previous information that Jake is sitting on a bench in
his back garden and reading his comic, the addition is actually unimportant. It will be best if the translated version is rewritten into Bangku tersebut hampir tidak terlihat dari seluruh kamar tidur dan jendela dapur pondok.
7. ‘We’re going to see the stones, Jake,’ she says. ‘The magic stones.’
‘Kita akan melihat batu, Kak,’ katanya. ‘Batu ajaib.’
The word the stones above are translated inaccurately into batu which means that the score 3 is given. In meaning, surely it rises a difference. The word the stones means that there are many stones in the place where Jake and his family
will visit. If it is translated into batu, it seems that there is only one stone and it is magical, then the story will not be interesting and horror anymore. The best translation of the word the stones are batu-batu since the sentence is said by a little girl.
A score 2 is given for judging the translation below. The inaccuracy is when translating a subtitle, the translator treats a similar way as translating the story.
8. Human Sacrifices Korban Manusia
sacrificed is only one. This can rise a different atmosphere toward its original story. Moreover, this is a special case because the phrase Human Sacrifices is the subtitle of the story of Deadly Game. To make the story being more striking and horror, it is better to translate the phrase Human Sacrifices into Korban-korban Manusia.
9. Then he sees that the stones are fenced off, and realizes that to reach them you have to pass through the Visitor Centre, which seems very busy.
Ternyata lokasi batu melingkar berpagar tinggi. Untuk mencapainya mereka harus lewat Pusat Informasi Wisata, yang saat itu tampak sesak.
The translated sentence above is given 4 because it is absolutely different from the original text. From the first sentence, it can be seen that the translator has different perspective with the author. First is the inaccurate translation of the stones into lokasi batu melingkar. If the translator chooses to say location, it
means that the parking area and the information centre are also fenced off. It is much better to say keep translating the stones into batu-batu tersebut.
The second case is seen from the translation of them and you into –nya and mereka. It is obviously seen that the pronoun them is referring to the phrase the
stones, in which the pronoun them is better changed into ke sana since it can
represent the area of the stones. Also, the personal pronoun you is referring to the readers. When the translator writes you into mereka, he excludes the readers from the story in which the author wants to make the readers get included in the story.
The best solution to reconstruct the sentence above is Kemudian dia melihat bahwa batu-batu tersebut dipagar tinggi dan untuk mencapai ke sana
10. There are no inner walls Tak ada dinding penyekat di dalamnya.
Since the case above is only the inaccurate translation of English plural form walls, the score 2 is suitable. In the original story, the author means to say that there is a big hall with no walls to separate the hall into many small rooms. In the translated version, the translator means that there is a big hall without a wall to separate the hall into two smaller rooms. Again, there is a different perspective between the author and the translator. To make it similar, it will be best to translate the sentence above into Tidak ada dinding-dinding penyekat di dalamnya.
11. …, and red arrows pointed on the floor show you which way to go.
Tanda panah berwarna merah yang ada di lantai menunjukkan arah ke mana mereka harus pergi.
The wrong translation of plural form into singular lies on the phrase red arrows and it is better to score it a 2 because there are two problems that are resulted. In the translated story, the phrase red arrows is translated shortly into tanda panah berwarna merah. Considering that in the original story the author
says that there is more than one arrow and that the readers have the knowledge about colours, it is best to translate the phrase into panah-panah merah.
13. The displays had explained that the circle was probably some kind of temple, a place where people had gathered to watch priests performing rituals.
Gambar itu menunjukkan bahwa lingkaran tersebut seperti semacam kuil, tempat orang-orang berkumpul untuk menyaksikan pendeta melakukan suatu ritual.
The translation of the words the displays, priests, and rituals which are made singular nouns and the noun people which is made singular are the reason why the target text above is given a 3. The inaccuracy translation is very significant in the interpretation. When the translator employs the word gambar for displays, pendeta for priests and suatu ritual for rituals, it makes the story less
striking because if these words are in singular forms, it seems that the activity and the objects are ordinary one. It is better to translate them according to their plural forms: gambar-gambar for the displays, para pendeta for priests and ritual-ritual for rituals. For the word gambar, it is better if translated into gambar-gambar yang ada di ruang pameran tadi. It is considered from the plot that before
entering the computer terminals, Jake sees the exhibits and displays first. For the noun people, it is better to say orang since in Indonesian language, orang can represent a plural meaning.
14. They must have gone in for human sacrifices too…
Mereka pasti menjadikan manusia sebagai korban persembahan...
score 4 is given. The sentence above is better reconstructed into Mereka juga pasti menjadikan manusia sebagai korban-korban persembahan.
15. It’s so easy for her to say those things.
Mudah bagi ibunya untuk bicara seperti itu.
The inaccurate translation of the phrase those things into seperti itu has caused a change in meaning. In the source text, the author chooses to use the phrase those things to mean that Jake’s mother is giving some advices and understanding for being very unfair to him. In the target text, the translator changes the meaning into seperti itu which possibly describes the way or manner of speaking of Jake’s mother. Instead of rising an ambiguity and avoiding a score 2 for the text, it is most appropriate to translate the phrase into hal-hal seperti itu.
16. The rest of the circle is made up of similar stones arranged in the same way, although some have fallen and left large gaps.
Batu melingkar itu terbuat dari batu yang sama dengan batu di pintu masuk dan tertata membentuk lingkaran. Beberapa batu bagian atas telah jatuh sehingga yang tampak hanya dua buah batu tinggi yang tegak berdiri.
There are two main reasons the translated text is given a 4. First, the inaccurate translation is risen in the phrase similar stones into batu yang sama. Considering that in the previous story when they just arrived, Jake could see many stones which were fenced off, the phrase similar stones is better translated into batu-batu yang sama to describe that the circle is made of some stones which are
Also, the inaccurate translation exists in the clause left large gaps. When reading the target text, the readers can perceive clearly that it is true that there is no circle stone because of the translation of the clause left large gaps into sehingga yang tampak hanya dua buah batu tinggi yang tegak berdiri. This can
happen because the readers understand the clause dua buah batu tinggi yang tegak berdiri as a pillar. In the Indonesian people’s mind, if there are two tall stones
standing upright, it is called pillar. Moreover, the meaning is fully changed between the source text and the target text for the sentence above.
The most suitable translation for the sentence above is batu-batu tersebut sama dengan yang di pintu masuk dan tertata membentuk lingkaran, walaupun
beberapa telah jatuh dan menciptakan jarak yang cukup luas di antara bebatuan
tersebut.
17. Jake sees that there’s also an inner ring of smaller stones.
Jake melihat bahwa di dalam batu melingkar terdapat sebuah lingkaran dalam yang terbuat dari batu yang lebih kecil.
The similar case also exists in the above sentence. Here, the translator is made confused in differentiating the circle stone and the inner ring which makes him decide to say batu melingkar and lingkaran dalam in which they are different in interpretation. As a result, a score 3 is given for the target text.
Another problem is the inaccurate translation of the phrase smaller stones into batu yang lebih kecil which causes a change in idea. If the idea of smaller stones is considered as a singular noun in Indonesian language, it means that the
interpret the meaning batu yang lebih kecil as one single stone with small size, then it will erase the existence of inner ring because the ring itself will not exist since it is made of a small stone.
Meaning to say, the best translation of the sentence above is Jake melihat bahwa di dalam lingkaran tersebut terdapat lingkaran lagi yang tersusun dari
batu-batu yang lebih kecil.
19. “No, thanks,” he says. “I don’t play stupid baby games.”
”Tidak!” jawab Jake. ”Aku tidak mau bermain permainan tolol seperti itu!”
The inaccurate translation of the phrase stupid baby games into permainan tolol seperti itu has affected the original story, especially to Jake’s characteristic.
In the source text, it is clearly seen that the author chooses to use plural noun games to describe that Jake really hates his sister and he does not want to be very
intimate with her. On the contrary, in the target text, the translator chooses to translate the noun into singular form. As the effect, the readers can interpret that Jake does not want to play hide and seek with Hannah, he possibly wants to play another game with her.
To strengthen the characteristic of Jake, it is better to change the sentence into “Tidak, terima kasih” jawab Jake. “Aku tidak mau main permainan-permainan bayi konyol!”
23. …; perhaps the flashes and rumbles are more bombs going off;..
…; mungkin gemuruh dan cahaya putih itu adalah bom-bom yang dijatuhkan;…
The inaccuracy in the sentence above is the phrase the flashes and rumbles into gemuruh dan cahaya and it is given a 2. Considering that the author described the flashes and rumbles as the representation of war, the translated version gemuruh dan cahaya is inaccurate because the atmosphere is becoming nothing. In war, usually the situation is very destructive by the bombs, which are not only making explosion, but also sounds and lights. To support the idea of war, it is best to say mungkin suara-suara gemuruh dan kilat-kilat putih tersebut adalah bom-bom yang dijatuhkan.
24. He tries not to think about it, or look at the displays he passes.
Jake mencoba untuk tidak
memikirkannya, tidak juga menengok foto di ruang pamer yang dilewatinya.
considered as singular form, it means that there is one photo. In order to make both stories suitable, it is good to translate the sentence into Jake mecoba tidak memikirkannya, ataupun menengok foto-foto di layar-layar komputer yang ia
lewati.
25. He stops after a few steps,… Jake berhenti,…
Another problem is found in the above sentence in which the translator omits after a few steps in which the readers can see the difference in meaning of both stories. In the source text, Jake is following his father and he is trying to call his father, but his father cannot listen to him at all that makes him give up and stops his steps. A different meaning is provided in the target text. The readers can interpret that Jake stops suddenly because of something that makes him shocked. The deletion of after a few steps has caused a significant change in meaning. To make it accurate and avoid the score 4, the best translation will be Jake menghentikan langkahnya.
26. Dead Eyes Mata Beku
28. Mum and Dad continue to pass things to Hannah,…
Ayah dan Ibu memberikan sesuatu kepada Hannah,…
Another inaccuracy is found in the translation of things into sesuatu. Considering that in the original story, the situation is that Jake’s family is sitting on the picnic table and having their lunch and Mum and Dad are helping Hannah to get her foods, it is most appropriate to say Ayah dan Ibu memberikan makanan kepada Hannah, instead of translating the word things into sesuatu that can mean
something mystic and get score 3, being contrary to the situation in the original story which is fun and happy.
29. …, his voice breaking into Jake’s thoughts.
…, suaranya membuyarkan lamunan Jake.
The different meaning of translating thoughts into lamunan also appears in the sentence above. The inaccuracy in translating plural form into its singular makes the text get a 2. Originally, Jake is still confused of the things that happen to him and it makes him wondering so many questions in his mind. That is why the author decides to use plural form for the word thought. The translator, in the contrary, shifts the meaning into singular form. If this happens, it means that Jake is only thinking about one thing. To avoid meaning shift from the original story, it is much better to translate the sentence above into suaranya membuyarkan semua lamunan Jake.
31. Jake tries to speak, but no words come out.
singular form. This first mistake brings the other mistake, that is translating words into suara. These two words are very different in meaning. As the readers can interpret in the source text that the author means to say that Jake is trying to speak, but he is still very shocked and he does not know what to say. It is very contrast with the target text. Here, the readers can interpret that someone makes Jake unable to speak, possibly with magic.
Jake mencoba berbicara, tetapi tak ada kata-kata yang keluar will be the
best translation for the sentence above because it will make no difference in meaning.
32. He pauses, raises a hand, flutters his fingers and makes a slow, falling gesture.
James berhenti sejenak, mengangkat tangan, menggerakkan jarinya memperagakan benda yang jatuh.
Another score 2 is given. James berhenti sejenak, mengangkat tangan, menggerakkan jemarinya memperagakan benda yang jatuh is the better
translation for the sentence above. The translation of his fingers into jemarinya is more suitable instead of translating it into singular form jarinya. Since the author wants to personalize James’ fingers to describe something falling, the word jemarinya is better used. In Indonesian language, jemarinya is considered as
33. ‘… There are a few over there in the trees, Jake. …’
‘… Lihat, ada beberapa jiwa yang hilang di balik pohon itu, Jake. …’ Another inaccurate translation of plural form into singular can be seen from the sentence above. The prepositional phrase in the trees is directly translated into di balik pohon itu which means that the target text gets a 2. In the original text, the word the trees is in plural form to describe that there is a small forest behind the picnic table and James is pointing at it. The word the trees is used as the representation of the forest. In the opposite, the translator tends to shift the plural form into singular noun pohon. The case is that by using the singular word pohon, the representation of the forest will be lost. The environment possibly will be a place with some trees growing, and James is pointing at one of those trees.
To describe the real environment of the original story and keep the environment in the translated version, the sentence Lihat, ada beberapa jiwa yang hilang di balik pepohonan di sana, Jake will be best.
34. At first all he can make out is dense shadow, dark trunks, branches with stiff black leaves that rattle in a brief gust of wind.
trunks it is shifted into singular form. For the sake of delivering a similar idea
between the author and the readers and keeping the horror atmosphere of both stories, it is suggested to say batang-batang pohon.
35. ‘… It might help you to avoid saying things you’ll regret.’
‘… Itu bisa membantumu untuk tidak mengatakan sesuatu yang nantinya akan membuat kamu menyesal.’
Another serious case when translating plural forms into singular can be observed from the sentence above. The existence of the plural word things is describing that Jake is very angry with his sister and he will say anything bad to Hannah to release his anger feeling. James, on the other hand, is giving advice to Jake not to say many things that can make him regret. The problem of the translated version sesuatu is that it seems that Jake probably says something intentionally that can make him regret. This cannot show the great anger of Jake to his sister’s mistake of replacing Jake with James. This different meaning also supports the text to get a 3.
The best solution to translate the source text above is Itu bisa membantumu untuk tidak mengatakan hal-hal yang nantinya akan membuat kamu
menyesal.
36. Jake looks at the clouds streaming across the dark sky, sees the flashes, hears the rumbles,…
Jake memandang langit. Awan melintasi langit gelap dan kilat menyambar, diikuti suara gemuruh.
forms can describe that the weather is very bad and usually a very bad weather, for example storm, can support the idea of magical use. Instead of changing the atmosphere of the story that becomes less scary, it will be great to translate the sentence into Jake memandangi segumpalan awan yang melintasi langit gelap dengan kilat-kilat menyambar diikuti suara-suara gemuruh.
The following sentence is also inaccurately translated in the use of plural and singular forms and the meaning shift which results in a 3 for the scoring system.
37. Jake glares at him, new questions already forming on his lips,…
Jake menatap James dengan marah. Ia hampir mengatakan sesuatu,…
The readers can see that the phrase new questions has been translated differently into sesuatu. The existence of the plural form new questions can illustrate that Jake is still very shocked and he wants to ask many questions in his mind. In the opposite, the translated word sesuatu seems that Jake wants to tell something or speak his last message.
The revised translation Jake menatap James dengan marah dan ia hampir meluapkan beberapa pertanyaan is better to describe Jake’s feeling toward James.
38. Jake and Hannah are already running up the path to the stones.
melingkar, considering that the word lokasi in Indonesian language can represent
a plural form since in the story there are many stones beside the circle stone. The advisable solution is Jake dan Hannah berlari mengikuti jalan setapak menuju lokasi batu melingkar.
39. …, a huge flash of lightning allowing him to scan the gaps between the inner stones.
Kilat yang menyambar membantunya melihat jarak di antara mereka dan lingkaran dalam.
The last case of inaccuracy in translating plural forms into singular can be seen from the above sentence. Beside the inaccurate translation of the phrase the inner stones into lingkaran dalam which should be translated into bebatuan di
lingkaran dalam, the translator also misunderstands with the clause scan the gaps
between the inner stones which is translated differently into melihat jarak di
antara mereka dan lingkaran dalam. These two cases affect the score for the text
which is 3. In the target text, the readers can obviously see that the translator means to say that there is a gap between Jake and Hannah and the circle stones. In fact, in the source text, the gap exists between the stones in the inner stones.
The most suitable translation for the sentence above is Kilat yang menyambar membantunya melihat jarak antara bebatuan di lingkaran dalam.
2. The Inaccurate Translation of English Singular Forms
6. Jake raises an eyebrow,… Jake mengangkat alisnya…
The first case of the inaccuracy in translating singular forms into plural is seen in the above sentence. The readers can see that in the source text, the author writes raising an eyebrow to describe that Jake is having many questions in his mind. While in the translated text, the translator writes mengangkat alisnya. It is different because in the culture of Indonesian people, raising two eyebrows means that someone is agreeing about something, since alis is considered as plural noun in Indonesian language. The meaning change in both texts above is the main reason that the target text is given a 3.
The best translation is Jake mengangkat sebelah alisnya menandakan perasaan bingung.
12. Is that a knife in one of his hands?
Pisaukah di tangannya itu?
The case is similar to the previous case. The translation of one of his hands into di tangannya can create a difference. In the phrase one of his hands, the author means to say that the man is holding a knife, possibly in his right hand or left hand. Since Indonesian people consider hand as a plural noun, the meaning di tangannya can be that the man is holding a knife with his two hands. Considering
18. But he can’t, especially as the feeling grows more powerful with every step he takes deeper into the circle.
Tetapi Jake tak bisa lagi mengabaikan sensasi aneh yang semakin kuat saat ia semakin masuk ke dalam lingkaran.
By comparing the source text and the target text, it can be traced that a different atmosphere has arisen. The clause with every step he takes in the source text means that Jake has felt the uncomforting sensation at the first time he enters the room, and he feels it stronger every time he takes a step deeper into the circle stone. The atmosphere goes weaker when the clause is translated into saat ia semakin masuk because the clause means that Jake feels the sensation after some
steps closer to the circle stone. In other word, the use of the adverbial time saat describes that Jake does not really feel the sensation when entering the room and he feels it when he gets closer to the circle stone. These differences motivate the text to get a 3 for the judgement.
In order to keep the similar atmosphere in both stories, the best translation for the sentence above is Tetapi Jake tidak bisa lagi mengabaikan sensasi aneh yang semakin kuat setiap kali ia melangkah semakin masuk ke dalam lingkaran.
20. She reaches out to touch the Heart stone, mumbles something Jake can’t hear
Hannah berusaha menyentuh The Heart Stone sambil menggumamkan kata-kata yang tak bisa didengar Jake.
Another problem is the inaccuracy in translating singular noun in the texts above. The author chooses to use singular form something to describe that Hannah is saying something mysterious and that Jake fully does not know what it is. The use of the word something is illustrating a mystical atmosphere. The translated version of the plural form kata-kata has described that actually Jake knows what his sister is saying, the problem is that he cannot clearly listen to it.
Those two problems also force the writer to give a 3 in indicating the score since there is a significant change in meaning. To make it good, the sentence Hannah mengulurkan tangannya dan menyentuh Heart Stone sambil
menggumamkan sesuatu yang tak bisa didengar Jake is the best Indonesian
version.
21. He can feel a pebble pressing painfully into a shoulder blade,…
Kerikil-kerikil terasa menusuk bahunya,..
The next problem in translating singular forms is found in the above texts. The phrases a pebble and a shoulder blade are translated inaccurately into kerikil-kerikil and bahunya. The phrase a pebble if translated into kerikil-kerikil-kerikil-kerikil means
that Jake is falling on rocky ground with so many pebbles and it should be his whole body gets hurt by the pebbles. In fact, the story actually tells that one pebble is pressing Jake’s shoulder, not many pebbles. Also, the phrase a shoulder blade if translated into bahunya, since Indonesian people recognize bahu as a
plural noun, means that Jake’s two shoulders are pressed by many pebbles.
above means suffer, while the Indonesian language terasa means some kind of sensation. Using the verb terasa for the target text above means that the pebble is actually not pressing Jake’s shoulder and that Jake does not feel the pain. Those three problems also mean that the target text is scored a 3
Jake merasakan sakit akibat kerikil yang menusuk sebelah bahunya is the
most suitable sentence to revise the target text above. 22. …, trying to remember the
sequence of events.
Jake mencoba mengingat-ingat kejadian sebelumnya.
What is inaccurate in the translation above is the translation of the phrase the sequence of events into kejadian sebelumnya. Although the word sequence in
English is included as a singular form, in Indonesian language it represents a plural form. By translating the phrase into its singular form kejadian sebelumnya, the idea is wholly changed and the score from a perfect 1 is decreased into a 2. The source text tells that Jake is experiencing many events started with entering the building and ended with falling. While the target text tells that Jake only experiences one event, then the verb mengingat-ingat is not appropriate for the noun kejadian since mengingat-ingat in Indonesian language should be followed by plural form.
The Indonesian version for translating the source text above is Jake mencoba mengingat-ingat rentetan kejadian sebelumnya.
27. …, laughs at something she’s saying, says something in reply that makes her laugh,…
…, tertawa pada apa yang dikatakan ibu, lalu menanggapinya dengan kata-kata yang membuat Ibu tertawa.
into its plural forms apa yang dikatakan ibu and kata-kata has caused a different perspective and a lower score, that is 2. In the first translated apa yang dikatakan ibu, it seems that whatever things Mum says are funny, while on the other side
James replays by also saying many things that Mum considers funny if translated into kata-kata. In fact, they may have a little joke which means that not all the things Mum and James say are funny. The suitable words to replace the inaccuracy will be tertawa pada sesuatu yang dikatakan ibu, lalu menanggapinya dengan ucapan yang membuat ibu tertawa.
30. ‘… I’ve even got your comic,’ ‘… Bahkan, komik-komikmu kini jadi milikku,’
The last inaccuracy in translating singular forms into plural can be observed in the above sentence, that is the translation of your comic into komik-komikmu. Actually, this sentence is very contrast with the first data in translating
the plural form one of his comics into its singular form komiknya. Considering the next sentence in the story that the word comic is replaced by its pronoun it since in James’ pocket there is only one comic, it is better to keep translating the word into its singular form. When translated into plural form komik-komikmu, it seems that James only says that all Jake’s belonging will be his. In fact, the word comic in the source text is used as a proof and a representation that whatever things Jake has will belong to James. The case also supports the score 2 which is given for the target text.
With some considerations above, the sentence ‘Bahkan, komikmu ini kini jadi milikku’ will be more suitable to keep the similar idea and meaning between
