The kinds of subjects constructed in the service-learning process
6.4 Complicated subjects
6.4.4 The enlightened subject
Anna’s comment above regarding a change of attitude is a good prelude to a further subject that was constructed during the sessions. In grappling with being enthusiastic, overwhelmed and frustrated, students developed the position of having insight, or enlightenment.
In the excerpt below, the same students who were battling with their frustration above, recount their experience with a community counsellor who came to speak at their community site, and who appeared to have an impact on them.
Carol: Why (.) why was the encounter with N*[[speaker]] so inspirational for
998 you all
999 Anna: She’s just inspirational Carol she is (.) she just has this 1000
Carol: But what did she teach you about (.) you were saying it helped you to 1001
understand why you were there (.) what was = 1002
Lisa: = Because 1003
Anna: Her approach 1004
Lisa: You don’t have to have a master’s degree in psychology to help people (.) 1005
she’s an HIV counsellor for the past ten years and it just goes back to (.) like 1006
helping the human condition (.) like you don’t have to be this high and mighty 1007
person with this (.) fancy title (.) and (..) she didn’t have to come with us (.) we 1008
were there for like two hours (.) we took two (.) two and a half hours of her 1009
time (.) and she was (.) cos when we driving back I was thinking oh my word I 1010
hope she’s I hope she isn’t late (.) I hope she doesn’t have appointments and 1011
everything (.) but it’s just (.) let me come and do it (.) and I phoned on Monday 1012
(.) please can you help me this is what we need (.) and (.) four o’clock 1013
afternoon yes you can like 1014
Group: [Ja::]
1015
Lisa: [People] are so willing and then (.) it just (.) it changed my whole 1016
perspective (.) and it just made me realise we need (.) in as much as we get 1017
frustrated and is I’m so critical of everything there (.) but (..) it’s children (.) 1018
that you trying to 1019
Carol: Assist [ja]
1020
Lisa: [Help]
1021
(Session 7)
In the talk, the students constructed a different kind of ‘other’; this other was willing,
flexible, and devoted to her calling. Lisa’s long narrative about N*’s willingness, humility and availability presented a detailed argument for this amazing ‘other’. Anna emphasised that it was the person of this other (“She’s just inspirational” (line 1000)), and her approach, that made her inspirational. The other that was constructed in the talk here is in complete opposition to the other of the frustrated subject. Lisa acknowledged that this experience of this willing other “changed my perspective” (lines 1016-1017), it “made me realise” (line 1017) and refocussed her on her goal of helping children.
The subject position of the enlightened subject is juxtaposed with the frustrated subject.
The enlightened subject is humbled by the other; she is reminded that “you don’t have to be this high and mighty person with this (.) fancy title” (lines 1007-1008). This is in contrast with the frustrated subject who positioned herself as superior to those who lacked initiative.
The amount of talk generated about this other is also in contrast to the very limited
references to the other in the previous excerpts (“they” and “this man”). This is another worthy of conversational space. The enlightened subject is therefore cognisant of her place and her goals, which are larger than the petty frustrations which consume the frustrated subject.
An enlightened subject is also constructed in the excerpt below, from session four, where Elle talked of an “epiphany” (line 1098), which resulted in her feeling liberated in her approach to her engagement with the community.
Carol: Um do you want to talk about the revelation that you have (.) you 1096
called it a revelation 1097
Elle: Our epiphany = 1098
Kate: = Our epiphany 1099
Carol: Oh 1100
Elle and Kate: [He he he he he]
1101
Carol: [You called it an epiphany]
1102
Lisa: I wanna hear 1103
Mary: I also want to hear 1104
Lisa: I don’t like Oprah don’t say aha moment 1105
(Session 4)
In the talk, I framed their experience as a “revelation” (lines 1096-1097), constructing it as a powerful realisation, with possible religious connotations. The students
corrected me, and preferred to use the word “epiphany” (lines 1098; 1099), which was repeated by both students almost instantaneously. Lisa also re-phrased it by asking them not to term it as an “aha moment” (line 1105), which she likened to Oprah (Winfrey). All of these terms speak of a moment of powerful insight. Lisa and Mary indicate their eagerness to hear about this insight. The talk therefore constructs the students as capable of this kind of enlightenment.
Later in the same session, Elle revealed the nature of the epiphany:
Elle: But I also found that it was part of our (.) aha moment that Kate and I 1288
had (.) our whole like (.) epiphany (.) was that we did go there with high 1289
expectations of what short-term community based interventions such as 1290
workshops could achieve (.) it was what we focused on doing as well (.) and 1291
then we realised that (.) well 1292
Carol: Relationship 1293
Kate: Mmm 1294
(Session 5)
In this excerpt, Elle described her realisation that their high expectations regarding what could be achieved in a short-term intervention were problematic. I suggested that the focus should be on “Relationship” (line 1293) rather than on workshops, and Kate murmured agreement. In the talk, Elle used the words “aha moment” (line 1288),
“epiphany” (line 1289), and “realised” (line 1292), which all indicate some sort of enlightenment. In constructing their experience in this way, Elle positioned herself and Kate as reaching a new stage of knowledge from within which they were not
previously operating.
The term “liberated” (line 1505) was also used in the talk to indicate a process of moving forward from previously restricting conditions.
Mary: Just to prepare that workshop I had to take myself back to my 1498
12-year-old self (.) and for me that was challenging but at the same 1499
time (.) it was like (.) it was a good reflection for me like (.) this was 1500
where I was and (.) and this is where I’ve come to in my life (.) and to 1501
share (.) that knowledge with someone always put yourself in their 1502
shoes 1503
Carol: Was it also liberating (.) like Elle was talking [just now about feeling 1504
liberated]
1505
Mary: [Ja for me]
1506
Carol: Like you actually went and ran a workshop on [sexuality] like 1507
Mary: [Yes]
1508
Carol: Who would have imagined 1509
Mary: [Like for me]
1510
Lisa: [(Cos) it’s] such a taboo in our culture [in our Indian families] to talk 1511
about sex 1512
Mary: [In our culture]
1513
(Session 4)
In this account, Mary related her experience of running a workshop on sexuality with
children at the community site. She emphasised that it was “challenging” (line 1499) for her.
She differentiated herself from the others by emphasising “for me” (lines 1499; 1510). She also related the benefits of this kind of challenging experience, and that upon reflection, she could track her progress: “this was where I was and (.) and this is where I’ve come to in my life” (lines 1500-1501). She thus used the talk to demonstrate personal growth. I framed this growth as “liberating” (line 1504), linking it to something Elle had said earlier in the session.
I then emphasised the importance of this action by using terms like “you actually” (line
1507) and “Who would have imagined” (line 1509). Lisa and Mary joined in this construction of this event as significant. Lisa used the term “taboo” (line 1511), which indicates that which is prohibited or forbidden, thus strengthening the significance of the talk of liberation. In this excerpt, there was also a lot of overlapping speech indicating the rapid pace used by the speakers, to intensify the importance of the event.
The enlightened subject is thus one who has moved to a new level of awareness, knowing and doing. Being positioned as enlightened infers the existence of others who are not enlightened, and a previous form of subjectivity where one was unenlightened. The enlightened subject therefore has a claim to a higher state of knowing and being. The enlightened subject has been freed from the previous restrictions on her being, enabling clearer vision and sense of purpose. This clarity of understanding may provide her with some distance from the preoccupations of the overwhelmed or frustrated subject or, alternatively, it may give her renewed vigour to pursue her goals. The enlightened subject is able to chart the way forward.