THE ERRORS OF UNITY AND COHERENCE IN WRITING
ENGLISH PARAGRAPH MADE BY THE SIXTH SEMESTER
STUDENTS OF D-3 ENGLISH STUDY PROGRAM OF USU : A
CASE STUDY
A THESIS
By :
NOVIKA PUJIASI
REG.NO. 040705043
UNIVERSITY OF NORTH SUMATERA
FACULTY OF LETTERS
ENGLISH LITERATURE DEPARTMENT
MEDAN
THE ERRORS OF UNITY AND COHERENCE IN WRITING
ENGLISH PARAGRAPH MADE BY THE SIXTH SEMESTER
STUDENTS OF D-3 ENGLISH STUDY PROGRAM OF USU : A
ASE STUDY
EG.NO. 040705043
upervisor, Co - Supervisor,
refa Ed ESOL ubis, MHum
IP. 131570483 NIP. 131284311
rements for the degree of Sarjana Sastra in English Literature epartment
C
A THESIS
By :
NOVIKA PUJIASI R
S
Drs.Yulianus Ha , M T Dra. Masdiana L N
Submitted to Faculty of Letters, University of North Sumatera in partial fulfillment of the requi
D
UNIVERSITY OF SUMATERA UTARA
LITERATURE DEPARTMENT
N
2008
FACULTY OF LETTERS
ENGLISH
Approved by the English Literature Department of Faculty of Letters
University of North Sumatera ( USU) Medan as thesis for The Sarjana
Sastra Examination.
Headwoman, Secretary,
Accepted by the Board of Examiners in partial fulfillment of requirements
for the degree of Sarjana Sastra from the English Literature Department,
Faculty of Letters, University of Sumatera Utara (USU), Medan.
The examination is held on the Faculty of Letters, University of Sumatera
Utara on Friday, July , 2008
The Dean of Faculty of Letters
University of Sumatera Utara
Drs. Syaifuddin MA, PhD
NIP. 132098531
Board of Examiners :
Dra. Swesana Mardia Lubis, MHum
...
Drs. Yulianus Harefa, MEd TESOL
...
Drs.
Syahron
Lubis,
MA
...
Dra. Masdiana Lubis, M.Hum
...
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
First of all, I, the writer of this thesis, would like to give all honor and praise to the Lord Jesus, the Almighty God, who always gives me chance, courage, faith, strength, and health to do my activities and to walk through so many times in my life. So many things including the complicated ones I can solve because of His goodness. Without His help and best love, I do not have the ability to accomplish this thesis.
Next, I would like to thank the Dean of Faculty of Letters of USU, Drs. Syaifuddin MA, PhD, both the Headwoman and the Secretary of English Literature Department, Faculty of Letters, Dra. Swesana Mardia Lubis, MHum and Drs. Yulianus Harefa, MEd TESOL, and also to Bang Jumadi and Bang Samsul for the attention they give in completing this thesis.
Then, I would like to express my gratitude and appreciation to my supervisor, Drs. Yulianus Harefa, MEd TESOL, for the comments, corrections, motivations, and suggestions he has given until I accomplished this thesis, and also to my co – supervisor, Dra. Masdiana Lubis, MHum, for the knowledge, guidance, constant encouragement, and criticism given to me to write this thesis.
My special gratitude is due to my beloved parents, my brothers and sisters (Frans, Agustina, and Tonovic Sianturi), my beloved uncles and aunty, and all families for the continous love, support, and praying.
Being together with all my friends of English Literature Department, Febri, Noni, Venny, Saiful, Sri, Yoan, Novitri, Widya, Nova, Zahara, and all of boys and girls inculding Erni, Novi A. K., Erni, Shera’05, Ira ‘05, Ratih ‘05, Hendra ’06, Rances ’06, and another my juniors who cannot be mentioned in this part, I thank you for the right and good things I got from you all. The most important thing I also thank you for giving me advices and happiness during my study in this university.
Later, I address many thanks for my seniors, Verawati ’02, Sylvia ’02, Yayang Naibaho ’02, Timbul ’02, Melyana ’03, Friska ’03, Eleazar, Tiur Situmorang, Elisabeth, Patar Sianipar., Masrina S., Dian Natalia, Agus Perangin - angin, Agus Alexius, Rio, whom I regard as my own brothers and sisters, and my old friends of Senior High School, Fajri, Iqbal, Winda Pardede, Mikha Yanti, Ahmad Ricardo, Romauli, Evitria Juliana, and others as my best friends. I hope our togetherness will last forever.
Finally, I hope this thesis will be usefull for those who have something to do with the subject discussed in it, and anothers who have the opportunity to read it.
Medan, June 2008
AUTHOR’S DECLARATION
I, Novika Pujiasi declare that I am the sole author of this thesis. Except where reference is made in the text of this thesis, this thesis contains no material published else where or extracted in whole or in part from a thesis by which I have qualified for or awarded another degree.
No other person’s work has been used without due acknowledgments in the main text of this thesis. This thesis has not been submitted for the award of another degree in any tertiary education.
Signed :
COPYRIGHT DECLARATION
Name : NOVIKA PUJIASI
Title of Thesis : THEERRORS OF UNITY AND COHERENCE IN
WRITING ENGLISH PARAGRAPH MADE BY THE SIXTH SEMESTER STUDENTS OF D-3 ENGLISH STUDY
PROGRAM OF USU : A CASE STUDY Qualification : S-1 / Sarjana Sastra
Department : English
I am willing that my thesis should be available for reproduction at the discreation of the Librarian of University of North Sumatera, Faculty of Letters, English Department on the understanding that users are made aware of their obligation under law of the Republic of Indonesia.
Signed :
ABSTRACT
Skripsi ini berjudul “The Errors of Unity and Coherence in Writing English Paragraph Made by the Sixth Semester Students of D-3 English Study Program of USU : A Case Study. Skripsi ini merupakan suatu kajian atau analisis tentang kesalahan berbahasa Inggris secara khusus dalam menulis satu paragraf berbahasa Inggris yang dibuat oleh mahasiswa – mahasiswa semester ke-6 kelas A dari Program Studi Bahasa Inggris (D-3) di Fakultas Sastra Universitas Sumatera Utara (USU). Yang menjadi objek kajian di sini adalah tulisan atau komposisi yang dikerjakan oleh para mahasiswa tersebut dan yang dicari adalah banyaknya error dalam menggunakan unity elements (unsur – unsur) kesatuan dan coherence (kekoherensian) dalam satu paragraf. Analisis ini memakai teori Oshima dan Hague dalam buku mereka yang berjudul Kemampuan Menulis secara Akademik (Academic Writing Skill) untuk menentukan syarat – syarat suatu paragraf ataupun essei asebagai paragraf atau essei yang baik tidak hanya dari segi struktur kalimat, penggunaan tanda baca (punctuation), dan semacam penggunaan bentuk gramatikal yang lainnya, tetapi juga dari segi kesatuan dan kekoherensiannya. Analisis ini memakai teori Corder yang tidak saja menekankan pada pengumpulan data namun juga pengenalan, mendeskripsikan, dan menguraikan kesalahan – kesalahan tersebut. Inilah yang menjadi dasar kerangka kerja penulis dalam menyelesaikan kajian tersebut. Analisis data – data yang telah diperoleh dari proses pengambilan data yang telah dilakukan sebelumnya dalam bentuk test dan kuesioner. Data diolah dengan menggunakan rumus, yaitu rumus Bungin) sehinggga diperoleh hasil yang disusun dalam bentuk tabel – tabel. Dari analisis yang dilakukan, didapat kesalahan atau error penggunaan unsur – unsur kesatuan (unity) sebanyak 24,03 % ( 37 kesalahan ) dan 75,97 % ( 117 kesalahan ). Dari analisis pengolahan data dilakukan secara bertahap dan diperoleh hasil yang dapat memberikan petunjuk kepada penulis untuk membuat suatu kesimpulan. Ini menunjukkan bahwa pembelajar bahasa target cenderung melakukan kesalahan secara tidak sadar karena belum memahami sepenuhnya aturan bahasa tersebut.
TABLE OF CONTENTS
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS AUTHOR’S DECLARATION COPYRIGHT DECLARATION ABSTRACT
TABLE OF CONTENTS
CHAPTER I INTRODUCTION
1.1 Background of the Analysis 1.2 Scope of the Analysis
1.3 Problems of the Analysis 1.4 Objectives of the Analysis 1.5 Significances of the Analysis
CHAPTER II REVIEW OF RELATED LITERATURE 2.1 Definition of Error and Error Analysis
2.1.1 Error, Mistake, and Lapse 2.1.2 Errors in Writing a Paragraph 2.1.3 Errors of Unity and Coherence 2.2 An Overview of Organization in Writing
2.2.1 Paragraph and its Three Parts 2.2.2 Unity
2.2.2.1 Topic and Controlling Idea 2.2.2.2 Relevant Sentences
2.2.3 Coherence
2.2.3.1 Repetition of Key Nouns 2.2.3.2 Consistent Pronouns 2.2.3.3 Transition Signals
2.3 Related Studies
CHAPTER III RESEARCH METHODOLOGY 3.1 Research Method
3.2 Data Collecting Method 3.3 Data Analysis Method
CHAPTER IV ERRORS OF UNITY AND COHERENCE IN D-3 ENGLISH STUDENTS’ WRITING 4.1 Analysis of Unity
4.2 Analysis of Parts of Coherence 4.3 The Percentage of the Data Analysis 4.4 The Table of the Analysis Result
CHAPTER V CONCLUSIONS AND SUGGESTIONS 5.1 Conclusions
5.2 Suggestions
BIBLIOGRAPHY APPENDICES
Appendix 1 : The Authorization Letter from the Faculty of Letters Appendix 2 : The Test
Appendix 3 : The Copy of Students’ Writing
ABSTRACT
Skripsi ini berjudul “The Errors of Unity and Coherence in Writing English Paragraph Made by the Sixth Semester Students of D-3 English Study Program of USU : A Case Study. Skripsi ini merupakan suatu kajian atau analisis tentang kesalahan berbahasa Inggris secara khusus dalam menulis satu paragraf berbahasa Inggris yang dibuat oleh mahasiswa – mahasiswa semester ke-6 kelas A dari Program Studi Bahasa Inggris (D-3) di Fakultas Sastra Universitas Sumatera Utara (USU). Yang menjadi objek kajian di sini adalah tulisan atau komposisi yang dikerjakan oleh para mahasiswa tersebut dan yang dicari adalah banyaknya error dalam menggunakan unity elements (unsur – unsur) kesatuan dan coherence (kekoherensian) dalam satu paragraf. Analisis ini memakai teori Oshima dan Hague dalam buku mereka yang berjudul Kemampuan Menulis secara Akademik (Academic Writing Skill) untuk menentukan syarat – syarat suatu paragraf ataupun essei asebagai paragraf atau essei yang baik tidak hanya dari segi struktur kalimat, penggunaan tanda baca (punctuation), dan semacam penggunaan bentuk gramatikal yang lainnya, tetapi juga dari segi kesatuan dan kekoherensiannya. Analisis ini memakai teori Corder yang tidak saja menekankan pada pengumpulan data namun juga pengenalan, mendeskripsikan, dan menguraikan kesalahan – kesalahan tersebut. Inilah yang menjadi dasar kerangka kerja penulis dalam menyelesaikan kajian tersebut. Analisis data – data yang telah diperoleh dari proses pengambilan data yang telah dilakukan sebelumnya dalam bentuk test dan kuesioner. Data diolah dengan menggunakan rumus, yaitu rumus Bungin) sehinggga diperoleh hasil yang disusun dalam bentuk tabel – tabel. Dari analisis yang dilakukan, didapat kesalahan atau error penggunaan unsur – unsur kesatuan (unity) sebanyak 24,03 % ( 37 kesalahan ) dan 75,97 % ( 117 kesalahan ). Dari analisis pengolahan data dilakukan secara bertahap dan diperoleh hasil yang dapat memberikan petunjuk kepada penulis untuk membuat suatu kesimpulan. Ini menunjukkan bahwa pembelajar bahasa target cenderung melakukan kesalahan secara tidak sadar karena belum memahami sepenuhnya aturan bahasa tersebut.
CHAPTER I
INTRODUCTION
1.1
Background of the AnalysisCommunication is a process of sending and receiving of messages that happens at any time when creatures (humans, animals, and plants) want to be acquainted and in contact with each other. As the most intellectual creature, human is the only one that can develop language as a tool of communication. By using language, the process of communication happens through three forms, they are, visual, oral and writing. This process can persist very well if each of humans wants to learn and to master four language skills, i.e. listening skill, speaking skill, reading skill, and writing skill as Nida and Harris’s statement in Tarigan’s book (1994 : 1).
Writing skill is one of language skills that plays a vital role in making a process of communication. For example, written communication in a nation or a country can determine whether that nation or country has progressed or not in communication aspect. This progress can be valued and accounted of the quality and the quantity of printing and publishing products done by that nation or country, such as, newspapers, magazines, books, etc that carry all regional, national, and international aspects.
“Writing is used by educated people(s) to record, to convince, to report, or to inform, and to influence in which these aims and purposes can be reached well by peoples who are able to arrange their thoughts and explain it clearly. This clearness depends on their way for thinking, organizing, using words, and structuring sentences.”
It is often found that in learning and language acquisition process, error is often made by the learners. There is a realization that doing errors is a part of learning that can not be avoided.Error is disabled side of utterance or writing of the learner that based on Tarigan and Tarigan’s remark (1995:141). Such errors can be classified as transpositions or substitutions, or additions of a speech sound or morpheme, word, or complete phrase, or some sort of blend of these (based on Corder’s idea in Sembiring and Harefa’s book (2006:122) ).
According to Richards et.al.(1985 : 95) in Longman Dictionary of Applied Linguistics errors are classified tend to vocabulary (lexical error), pronunciation
(phonological error), grammar and sentence (syntactical error), misunderstanding of a speaker’s intention or meaning (interpretive error), and production of the wrong communicative effect through the faulty use of a speech act or one of the rules of speaking (pragmatic error) that make the term ’error analysis’ exist in language learning process so that we can find out how well people(s) knows a language. A difference between an error and mistake is error results from incomplete knowledge, whereas a mistake made by a learner when writing or speaking and which is caused by lack of attention, fatigue, carelessness, or some other aspect of performance.
Academic writing as the kind of writing in university, it differs from other kinds of writing such as personal, literary, journalistic, or business writing. Its differences can be explained in part by its special audience, tone, and purpose. As Corder also remarks (in Sembiring and Harefa, 2006:122) :
“We should be aware that different types of writen material may produce a different distribution of error or a different set of error types. The distinction here is between the learner selecting his own messages and processing already given mesages. In the latter case there is also the problem of comprehension of the messages of the original texts.”
Errors that appear in form of writing are dominantly categorizedas syntactical errors. Syntactical error is the error in the use of a major element of sentence structure which makes a sentence or utterance difficult or impossible to understand. For example :
a. the error of verb phrase
1. the omission of main verb He [ fell ?] in the water. 2. the omission of to be He in the water
b. the omission of there Is one bird
Based on the definiton of syntax as Richards and his friends say in Longman Dictionary of Applied Linguistic (1985 : 284 & 285) : “ it is the study of how
words combine to form sentences and the rules which govern the formation of sentences”, I can assume that writing which has the syntatic activity for moving our thoughts or our assumptions in mind to written form in a paper such as in a sentence or some sentences is not easy, particularly until making a correct paragraph which has unity and coherence.
It is supported by Bram’s theory (1995). He said the word ‘unity’ is synonymous with ‘oneness’. All sentences in a paragraph should focus on the one thung expressed in the topic sentecne. The problem stated in the sentences has to be settled. Unity can be achieved as long as the paragraph has good and clear topic sentence.
In addition to make a paragraph well, coherence plays a crucial role. Every coherent paragraph contains smoothly connected ideas or consists of interrelated sentences which move in such a way that they smooth the way. Each sentence moves on naturally. To achieve coherence, we needs to use the transition signal, such as, however, although, finally, nevertheless, and so on.
It is an example of paragraph contains the elements of good unity and coherent :
Gold, a precious metal, is prized for two important characteristics. First of all, gold has a lustrous beauty that is resistant to corrosion. Therefore, it is suitable for jewelry, coins, and ornamental purposes. Gold never needs to be be polished and will remain beautiful forever. For example, a Macedonian coin remains as untarnished today as the day it was minted twenty – three centuries ago. Another important characteristics of gold is its usefulness to industry and science. For many years, it has been used in hundreds of industrial applications. The most recent use of gold is in astronauts’ suits. Astronauts wear gold – plated heat shields for protection outside spaceships. In conclusion, gold is treasured not only for its beauty but also for its utility.
example is given for each one. This is kind of logical order. Furthermore, the relationship between the ideas is clearly shown by using appropriate transition words and phrases such as first of all, for example, another important characteristics, and in conclusion.
As the comparison, it is an example of paragraph without contains the elements of unity and coherene :
Gold, a precious metal, is prized for two important characteristics. It has a lustrous beauty that is resistant to corrosion. It is suitable for jewelry, coins, and ornamental purposes. It never needs to be be polished and will remain beautiful forever. A Macedonian coin remains as untarnished today as the day it was minted twenty – three centuries ago. Another of its important characteristics is its usefulness to industry and science. It has been used in hundreds of industrial applications. Its most recent use is in astronauts’ suits. Astronauts wear heat shields made from it for protection outside spaceships. In conclusion, it is treasured not only for its beauty but also for its utility.
The model paragraph about gold above is a paragraph without coherence because throuhout the the whole of the paragraph, the word gold has been replaced by pronouns, making the paragraph much less coherent. Besides that, there are no use of transition signal such as first of all, therefore, for example,for many years, and in conclusion, that have significance to make this paragraph more chronological.
I choose the title that related to the writing because I found that there is reality that the errors still appear in students’s writing, including the students that study at English course. I choose the sixth semester students of D-3 English Department of Faculty of Letters of USU because they are students who has a lecture about how write a good paragraph and an essay at their curriculum that given by their faculty. They also have learnt the writing subject for five semester and the way of writing a paragraph they have got at the fifthe semester. So, with English grammar and many aspects of English have been their strong basic to develop their knowledge and skill in writing English paragraph. Based on their wiriting, I can conclude whether they minimalize such kinds of errors in writing a good and correct paragraph which should consists of unity, coherence, and logical orders.
1.2 Scope of the Analysis
The analysis is limited on the use of unity and coherence that can be categorized as the syntactical erros in writing English paragraph made by D-3 English students who have been given the strong basic of English grammar at the university in order to be able to use English well. The analysis is on students’ data in combining and constructing words and sentences to arrange a paragraph based on Oshima’s and Hague’s (1999) theory of writing good paragraph and essay.
1.3 Problems of the Analysis
The problems of this thesis that I research are :
b. What are big type of uniy and coherence that found in the D-3 students writing ?
c. What are difficulties the students face in writing a good paragraph ?
d. How well the students apply Oshima’s and Hague’s theory of writing English paragraph ?
1.4 Objectives of the Analysis
The objectives of the analysis that includes some found results after doing this researh and some answers linked with poblems of the analyis are :
1. to find out the type of errors of unity and coherence made by the D-3 students in writing a paragraph
2. to find out the what the big type of uniy and coherence that found in the D3 students writing is
3. to describe difficulties the students face in writing a good paragraph
4. to figure out how well the students apply Oshima’s and Hague’s theory of writing English paragraph
1.5 Significances of the Analysis
Through doing the analysis, I wish this thesis can be an useful information theoretically and practically. Therefore, the significances of my thesis are stated as follow :
Theoretically, the significances of my thesis are :
2. to know some information about writing aspect or important writing things for the students especially the English students
Practically, th e significance of my thesis is :
CHAPTER II
REVIEW OF RELATED LITERATURE
2.1 Definiton of Error and Error Analysis
According to Crystal (1980 : 134 – 135) :
“Error is a term used in psycholinguistics referring to mistakes in spontaneous speaking or writing attributable to a malfunctioning of the neuromuscular commands from the brain. It is thus distinct from the traditional notion of error, which was based on the language user’s ability to conform a set of real or imagined standards of expression.”
Whereas, for the error analysis, he defines as follows :
“In language teaching and learning, error analysis is techique for identifying, classifying and systematically interpreting the mistakes made by someone learning a foreign language, using any of the principles and procedures provided by linguistics.”
“Human learning is fundamentally a process that involves the making of mistakes. Mistakes, misjudgements, miscalculations, and erroneous assumptions form an important aspect of learning virtually any skill or acquiring information. You learn to swim by first jumping into the water and flailing arms and legs until you discover that there is a combination of movements that succeeds in keeping you afloat and propelling you through the water. The first mistakes of learning to swim are giant ones, gradually diminishing as you learn from making those mistakes. By using mistakes to obtain feedback from the environment and with that feedback to make new attempts which successfully more closely approximate desired goals.”
If a child learns his first language, he will make countless “mistakes” from the point of view of adult grammatical language. Many of these mistakes are logical in the limited linguistic system within which the child operates, but by carefully processing feedback from others the child slowly but surely learns to produce what is acceptable spech in his native language. One of the factors which influence how succesful a person in learning a second language is the person’s ability to learn, notably intelligence and a set of more specific language – learning abilities. Here the ability concerns with :
a. the ability to discriminate sounds to store auditory data over something longer than a few seconds.
b. the ability to recognize the grammatical functions of words and sentences. c. the ability to memorize materials, whether meaningful or meaningless. d. the ability to infer linguistic patterns from new linguistic contexts.
speaker. Such error can be classified as transpositions, or substitutions or additions of a speech sound or morpheme, word or complete phrase, or some sort of blend of these. Some ill – formed utterance appear to be false false starts or restructurings of what the speaker want to say.
Errors are the important source of information about Second Language Acquisition (SLA) because errors demonstrate conclusively that learners do not simply memorize target language rules and then reproduce them in their own utterances.
Errors of appropriateness may however, be generally classified into :
a. referential errors, where the speaker use a term with the intention of referring to some feature of the world to which it is conventionally inacapplicable, for example : when he calls a hat a cap
b. registers errors, where for example in naval context the speaker refers to
a naval ship a boat
c. social errors, where the speaker selects form which are inappropriate to his or her social relations with his hearer, as when a pupil greets his teacher with : well, how are we today, old man ?
d. textual errors, when the speaker does not select the structurally correct form to show the intended relation between two sentences in a discourse, as for example in answer to the question : who is the man over there ? Jhon is
those of the target language. Ellis (1985 : 9) remarks that it is rare that a learner produces the same error in all contexts of use . It is much more likely that a learner produces an error in some context but not in others. So, error analysis is the fact that the learners do make errors and these errors can be observed, analyzed, and classified to reveal something of the system operating within the learner, led to a surge of study of learner’s errors.
2.1.2 Error, Mistake, and Lapse
There are many differences between mistake and error. The mistake (1973 : 280) refer to a performance error that is a failure to utilize a known system correctly by the native speakers; resulting from memory mistakes, physical condition, such as tiredness and psychological condition, such as strong emotion. Mistake is also characterized as unsystematic deviation or inconsistent deviation. In this case the learner has been taught the right form of the language, sometimes the learner ‘gets it right’ but sometimes he makes a mistake and uses the wrong form.
Tarigan and tarigan (1995 : 75 – 76) support and add Corder’s thoery of error and mistake as follows :
biasanya tidak lama, karena itu pula, kekeliruan tiu sendiri tidak bersifat lama.
Sebaliknya, kesalahan disebabkan oleh faktor performansi. Artinya, siswa memang belum memahami sistem linguitik bahasa yang digunakannya. Kesalahan bahasa biasanya terjadi secara konsisten, jadi, secara sistematis. Kesalahan itu dapat berlangsung lama apabila tidak diperbaiki. Perbaikan biasanya dilakukan oleh guru, misalnya melalui pengajaran remedial, latihan, praktek, dan sebagainya. Sering dikatakan bahwa kesalahan merupakan gambaran terhadap pemahaman siswa akan sistem bahasa yang sedang dipelajarinya. Bila tahap pemahaman siswa akan sistem bahasa yang sedang dipelajarinya ternyata kurang maka kesalahan sering terjadi, dan kesalahan akan berkurang apabila tahap pemahaman semkain meningkat.
An English learner who have been taught the use of English verb and make an overgeneralization as to the auxiliary verb such as may. He says, Bob mays go, She will come, etc indicating that the learner has not distinguished modals from other verbs, we may indicate this feature as error of the student. However, in one or two occasions, he says, Bob mays go, but on another occasions says Bob may go, we may indicate that the learner committing a mistake.
Error which refers to error of competence or systematic error is a systematic deviation, when a leatner has not learnt something and consistently “gets it wrong”, as an error. For instance, a child acquiring his own language sometimes make the same error, in the same way when a learner of English makes an error. Systematically, it because he has not learnt the correct form until he has been told otherwise, or until he notices that the native speakers of the language that he is learning do not produce this form, he will produce this quite consistenly as the native speakers do.
will yield important evidence about how utterances are planned or executed. This is part of the psycho – linguistic and neuro – linguistic research into language performance. Native speakers, then, frequently make slips or false starts or confusions of structure. These slips aspeaker makes are of several sorts; one is changes of plan, when he starts an utterance, breaks off, and starts another one with a different structure. For example :
It’s a bit – it hasn’t – I mean, I wouldn’t really care to have one just like that . . .
He may convert one structure into another withour breaking off. These mistakes have been called ‘syntactic blends’. Here is an example from a ‘Letter to the editor’ :
One wonders . . . why this country should support foreigners in our already overcrowded prisons . . . for the non – payment of fines of which they had no opportunity to pay.
The redundant of appears to arise from a confusion of two constructions : . . . no opportunity of paying
. . . no opportunity to pay
Then, there are ‘slips of the tongue’ or ‘slips of the pen’. These are the subject of investigation at the present time by linguists interested in language performance. Typical of such slips are the substitution, transposition or omission of some segment of an utterance, such as speecg sound, a morpheme, a word or even a phrase. Here are some examples :
It didn’t bother me in the sleast . . . slightest But those frunds . . . funds have been frozen . . . of Peester Ustinov
Since many of these lapses seem to increase in frequency under conditions of stress, indecision and fatigue, it is to be presumed that the second language learner will demonstrate similar lapses in performance, where all these conditions are likely to be more pronounced. It may not always be easy to distinguish such lapses, slips and mistakes of performance from errors arising from an imperfect competence in the target language.
2.1.3 Errors in Writing
important utilize letter writing conventions such as standard layout and accepted openings and closings.
Recent development in English Language teaching has seen a shift in focus from teaching individual components such as reading, writing, speaking, and grammar toward teaching these components integratively as they are being used in daily communication. This change in methodological approach subsequently affects the way teachers perceive learners' errors in writing. Teachers no longer view errors only as those which affect discreet grammatical, lexical, or structural items but also as errors that affect a written text. In other words, teachers today are also concerned about a particular piece of writing communicating effectively and meaningfully by means of its unity coherence and its conforming to the expectations of its prospective readers.
insights into their errors. Teachers find it impractical to correct the whole erroneous section.
2.1.4 Errors in Students’ Writing
Students’s writing at the graduate level need to master specific writing tasks, such as summarizing, paraphrasing, and critiquing the work of others. These tasks are designed to help students understand and execute such tasks since they play an important role in a variety of wriitng projects, from short papers to theses. These tasks that require good skills are the continuation of the previous learning of writing subject that students take from their school such as from their senior high school. From senior high school, students need to demonstrate their skills in such forms of writing for creative and imaginative texts such as essays, short stories, poetry, and drama and for persuasive and informative texts such as reports, proposal, memoranda, and so on. Students are expected to apply effectively the conventions of usage and the mechanics of written English in order that they are able to set and develop their ideas in their mind to produce good writing.
To supportSwales’ and Feak’s idea, I will insert the examples of students’ errors in writing that are sited by Oshima and Hogue (1999 : 260 – 261) as follow :
The use of Incorrect / Error Correct
Punctuation I live. And go to school here. Where do you work.
I live and go to school here. Where do you work ?
Word missing I working in a restaurant. I am working in a restaurant.
Capitalization It is located at main and baker streets in the City.
It is located at Main and Baker Streets in the city.
verb tense I never work as a cashier until I get a job there.
I had never worked as a cashier until I got a job there.
subject – verb
agreement
The manager work hard. There is five employees.
The manager works hard. There are five employees. make one word
or sentence
Every one works hard.
We work together. So we have become friends.
Everyone works hard.
We work together, so we have become friends.
Spelling The maneger is a woman. The manager is a woman.
Plural She treats her employees like slave.
She treats her employees like slaves.
unnecessary
word
My boss she watches everyone all the time.
wrong word form Her voice is irritated. Her voice is irritating.
wrong word The food is delicious. Besides, the restaurant is always crowded.
The food is delicious. Therefore, the restaurant is always crowded.
pronoun
reference error
The restaurant’s specialty is fish. They are always fresh. The food is delicious. Therefore, it always crowded.
The restaurant’s specialty is fish. It is always fresh.
The food is delicious. Therefore, the restaurant is always crowded.
wrong word
order
Friday always is our buisest night.
Friday is always our busiest night.
run – on Lily was fired she is upset Lily was fired, so she is upset.
Lily was fired; therefore, she is upset. comma splice (incorrectly joined independent clauses)
Lily was fired, she is upset. Because Lily was fired, she is upset.
Lily is upset because she was fired.
fragment
(incomplete
sentence)
She was fired. Because she was always late.
add a transition She was also careless. She frequently spilled coffee on the table.
She was also careless. For example, she frequently spilled coffe on the table.
Subject Is open from 6:00 P.M. until the last customer leaves.
The restaurant is open from 6:00 P.M. until the last customer leaves.
Verb The employees on time and work hard.
The employees are on time and work hard.
Preposition We start serving dinner 6:00 P.M.
We start serving dinner at 6:00 P.M.
Conjuction The garlic shrimp, fried clams, broiled lobster are the most popular dishes.
The garlic shrimp, fried clams, and broiled lobster are the most popular dishes.
[image:32.595.108.519.82.534.2]Article Diners expect glass of water when they first sit down at table.
Diners expect a glass of water when they first sit down at the table.
2.2 An Overview of Organization in Writing
Remembering that good prose must have not only grammatical correctness but unity, coherence, and emphasis as well, and further that the paragraph may be thought of as the whole work in miniature, we who want to start to write will concentrate on producing paragraph (s) that satisfy (ies) the acknowledged requirements.
2.2.1 Paragraph and its Three Parts
A paragraph has three major structural parts: a topic sentence, supporting sentences, and a concluding sentence.
The topic sentence states the main idea of the paragraph. It not only names the topic of the paragraph, but it also limits the topic to one or two areas that can be discussed completely in the space of a single paragraph. The specific areas is called the controlling idea. For example :
Topic (Topic) (Controlling idea)
Sentence Gold, a precious metal, is prized for two important characteristics. In addition, Oshima and Hague state that the topic sentence is a complete sentence (1999 : 20 - 21) and it is usually (but not always) the first sentence in the paragraph.From this topic sentencee, a writer can see what information to include and what information to exclude and the reader can see what the paragraph is going to be about.
There are three important points to remember about the topic sentence : 1. A topic sentence is a complete sentence, that is, it contains a subject, a
verb, and (usually) a complement. The following are not complete sentences :
How to register for college classes.
2. A topic sentence contains both a topic and a controlling idea. It names the topic and then limits the topic to a specific area to be discussed in the space of a single paragraph.
The following examples show how a topic sentence states both the topic and the controlling idea in a complete sentence :
Driving on freeways requires skill and alertness.
Register for college classes can be a frustrating experience for new students.
3. A topic sentence gives only the main idea. Therefore, it is the most general statement in the paragraph. It does not give any specific idea.
This is an example of a general statement that could serve as a topic sentence :
Good The Arabic origin of many English words is not always obvious.
This sentence, on the other hand, is too specific to serve as a topic sentence :
Too specific The slang expression “so long” (meaning goodbye) is probably a
Corruption of the Arabic “salaam”.
First of all, gold has a lustrous beauty that is resistant to corrosion. For example, a macedonian coin remains as untarnished today as the day it was minted twenty – three centuries ago. Another important characteristic of gold is its usefulness to industry and science. The most recent use of gold is in astronauts’ suits.
The concluding sentence signals the end of the paragraph and leaves the reader with important points to remember. For example :
In conclusion, gold is treasured not only for its beauty, but also for its utility.
2.2.2 Unity
Unity means that there is a concentration on the explanation of the purpose of writing topic idea in a paragraph. There are no irrelevant sentences ot the sentences that are developed in a paragraph. As readers move into a paragraph, they need to know where they are, in relation to the whole essay, and what to expect in the sentences to come. In a well – unified paragraph, there is a foundation on which to build with a topic sentence and main sentences which clearly support the controlling idea. By means of secondary sentences, a main idea may be elaborated with specific details, illustrations, or personal observations, always provided that every secondary sentence does clearly illuminate the main sentence with which is used, and further, that it preserves the meaning and purpose of the paragraph as a whole as set forth by the controlling.idea.
An example of paragraph that lacks of unity that is represented by Pilus
OUR LIFE IS BETTER WITHOUT AUTOMOBILES
Apart from expenditure and environment, life without automobiles will decrease the number of road casualties. A country like Denmark where people of all generations ride on bicycles in the city has proven it. The road casualties could be decreased by not using automobiles. Furthermore, road accidents that are caused by bicycles have lesser degrees of serious injury. On the other hand, if a collision happens, for example, between a car and a lorry, the possibility of death, major injuries and handicap is higher. It is also known that the rate of road accidents excessively increases during major festivals such as Hari Raya, Chinese New Year, and school vacation. These examples clearly show that how automobiles can turn our lives into miserable ones.
Explanation : In the above paragraph, the Pilus’s student inserts information (the rate of accident is higher during festivals) which is of no direct relevance to the topic being discussed. The digression diverts the reader's attention from the main idea for a while. In that sense, it is a problem because there is a lack of unity in points which requires extra effort on the reader's part to review the paragraph for a better understanding. So, this sentence should be erased in order to become paragraph which has good unity:
OUR LIFE IS BETTER WITHOUT AUTOMOBILES
2.2.2.1Topic and Controlling Idea
Basen on Oshima’s and Hague’s idea (1999 : 23), a topic sentence has two essential parts : the topic and the controlling idea. The topic names the subject, or main idea, of the paragraph. The controlling idea makes a specific comment about the topic, which indicates what the rest of the paragraph will say about the topic. It limits or controls the topic to a specific aspect of the topic to be discussed in the space of a single paragraph. As the examples :
1.) TOPIC CONTROLLING IDEA Convenience foods are easy to prepare.
From that example, the topic is named : convenience foods. A specific comment is then made about the topic : they are easy to prepare. From this sentenc, the reader should immediately knows that the supporting sentences in the remainder of the paragraphwill explain or prove how quick and easy it is to prepare convenience foods and perhaps give some examples (frozen dinners, canned soups, etc.)
2.) TOPIC CONTROLLING IDEA
The average American teenager consumes enormous quantities of junk food.
2.2.2.2Relevant Sentences
The second part of unity is that every supporting sentence must directly explain or prove the main idea that is stated in the topic sentence. Do not include any information that does not directly support the topic sentence. These are called relevant studies. Sometimes studnets write supporting sentences that are “off the topic”. These are called irrelevant sentences.
For example, if someone are writing a paragraph about the high cost of sollege tuition, he could mention inflation as a factor. However, if he writes several sentences about inflation, he are getting off the topic, and his paragraph will not have unity.
2.2.3 Coherence
2.2.3.1 Repetition of Key Nouns
Repetition of key nouns is an important technique for gaining coherence, because if too much information seems new, a paragraph will be hard to read. 2.2.3.2Consistent Pronouns
Oshima and Hague remarks that (1999 : 42) when we use pronouns instead of key nouns, make sure that we use the same person and number throughout his or her paragraph. Do not change from you to he or she (change of person), or from he to they (change of number). But, there is no fixed rule about how often to repeat key nouns or when to substitute pronouns. At the very least, it is important to repeat a key noun instead of using a pronoun when the meaning is not clear.
As the examples from the previous chapter (chapter I) about two
models of paragraph coherence and without with coherence, the second paragraph is paragraph without coherence because throughout the paragraph, the word gold has been replaced by pronouns, making the paragraph much less coherent; whereas, in the first paragraph which is coherent paragraph contains the noun gold seven times, the pronoun it twice, and the pronoun its three times. 2.2.3.3Transition Signals
however, in contrast), an example (for example), a result (as a result), or a
conclusion (in conclusion). For example : Paragraph 1 without transition signals
A difference among the world’s seas and oceans is that the salinity varies in different climate zones. The Baltic Sea in Northern Europe is only one – fourth as saline as the Red Sea in the Middle East. There are reasons for this. In warm climates, water evaporates rapidly. The concentration of salt is greater. The surrounding land is dry and does not contribute much fresh water to dilute the salty sea water. In cold climate zones, water evaporates slowly. The runoff created by melting snow adds a considerable amount of fresh water to dilute the saline sea water.
Paragraph 2 with contains transition signals
Another difference among the world’s seas and oceans is that the salinity varies in different climate zones. For example, the Baltic Sea in Northern Europe is only one – fourth as saline as the Red Sea in the Middle East. There are reasons for this. First of all, in warm climates, water evaporates rapidly; therefore, the concentration of salt is greater. Second, the surrounding land is dry and does not contribute much fresh water to dilute the salty sea water. In cold climate zones, water evaporates slowly. Furthermore, the runoff created by melting snow adds a considerable amount of fresh water to dilute the saline sea water.
Explanation : Paragraph 2 is more coherent because it contains transition signals. Each transition signal has a special meaning. Each shows how the following sentence relates to the preceding one.
Another tells the reader that this paragraph is part of a longer essay.
For example tells the reader that an example of the preceding idea is coming.
Two tells the reader to look for two different reasons. First of all tells the reader that this is the first reason.
Second and furthermore indicate that additional ideas are coming.
Therefore and consequently indicate that the second statement is a result of the first statement.
Note : We should not use a transition signal in front of every sentence in a paragraph. Using too many transition signals can be just as confusing as using too few. However, good writing requires that the use of transition signals is enough to make the relationships among our ideas clear.
TRANSITION SIGNALS FOR GENERAL USE
TO SHOW ADDITION
and, also, besides, further, furthermore, in addition, moreover, next, too, first, second
TO GIVE EXAMPLES
for example, for instance, to illustrate, in fact, specifically TO COMPARE
also, in the same manner, similarly, likewise
TO CONTRAST
but, however, on the other hand, in contrast, nevertheless, still, even though, on the contrary, yet, although
TO SUMMARIZE OR CONCLUDE
in other words, in short, in summary, in conclusion, to sum up, that is, therefore TO SHOW TIME
after, as, before, next, during, later, finally, meanwhile, then, when, while, immediately
TO SHOW PLACE OR DIRECTION
above, below, beyond, farther on, nearby, opposite, close, to the left
if, so, therefore, consequently, thus, as a result, for this reason, since
2.3.1 Theoretical Frameworks
Oshima (1999) in Academic Writing Skills give very well descriptions, explanations, and examples to be analyzed in writing good paragraph and essay. According to Oshima, unity can be achieved if there is only one main idea is discussed and there are every supporting sentence must directly explain or prove the main idea that is stated in the topic sentence. Whereas, coherence can be achieved if involving repeating key nouns and using pronouns that refer back to key nouns, using transition signals to show how one idea is related to the next and arranging sentences in logical order.
Hacker’s (2004) in The Bedford Handbook for Writers attends to the linguistic and social cause of errors and to the effect of effect on readers through sentence rhetoric and diction to grammar, punctuation, and mechanics. It also puts the stages of writing process in context, thereby showing students when and how to revise and edit their drafts.
Creme and Lea (2003) in the second edition of Writing at University : A Guide for Students which has been a collaborative project in which we have had
to merge ways of writing from our own different disciplinary backgrounds. We have not always found this essay and so we would like to acknowledge each other for being supportive at the times when a lot of us confidence in the writing process was lacking.
“The study of error is part of the investigation of the process of language learning. In this respect it resembles methodologically the study of the acquisition of their mother tongue. It provides us with a picture of the linguistic development of a learner and may give us indications as to the learning strategies. In this respect, error analysis may prove to be one of the central activities in the psycholinguistics study of language learning.”
Ellis (1985) in Understanding Second Language Acquisition remarks that second language acquisition (SLA) refers to all the aspects of language that the language learner neds to master. It is the study of how learners learn an additional language after they have acquired their mother tongue. Errors are evidences of non – learning, of the failure to overcome proactive inhibition.
2.3.2 Previous Studies
her thesis, she found that the students of SMP Sutomo make more errors in structural usage than ther cases.
CHAPTER III
RESEARCH METHODOLOGY
3.1 Method of Resesarch
Based on Arikunto’s theory of the source of data that taken by a researcher (1996 : 115 - 117 & 129 - 131) below :
“Pada bagian berikut akan dibicarakan juga sumber data, dalam hubungan dengan seluruh atau sebagian sumber data, diambil sebagai subjek penelitian. Sehubungan dengan wilayah sumber data yang dijadikan sebagai subjek penelitian ini, maka dikenal 3 jenis penelitian :
1. penelitian populasi
Populasi adalah keseluruhan obyek penelitian. Apabila seseorang ingin meneliti semua elemen yang ada dalam wilayah penelitian, maka penelitiannya merupakan penelitian populasi. Studi atau penelitiannya juga disebut studi populasi atau studi sensus.
2. penelitian sampel
Sampel adalah sebagian atau wakil populasi yang diteliti. Dinamakan penelitian sampel apabila kita bermaksud untuk menggeneralisasikan hasil penelitian sampel.
3. penelitian kasus
Penelitian kasus adalah suatu penelitian yang dilakukan secara intensif, terinci, dan mendalam terhadap suatu organisasi, lembaga atau gejala tertentu. Ditinjau dari wilayahnya, maka penelitian kasus hanya meliputi daerah atau subjek yang sangat sempit. Tetapi ditinjau dari sifat penelitian, maka penelitian kasus lebih mendalam. Contoh penelitian populasi
Peneliti bermaksud mengetahui penggunaan buku paket di SMP se Daerah Istimewa Yogyakarta. Peneliti mengumpulkan data ke seluruh SMP yang ada di seluruh Daerah Istimewa Yogyakarta baik negeri maupun swasta. Kesimpulannya berlaku bagi SMP seluruh wilayah provinsi tersebut.
Contoh penelitian sampel
sekolah. Kesimpulan yang dihasilkan dari penelitian ini berlaku bagi seluruh SMP di Daerah istimewa Yogyakarta.
Contoh penelitian kasus
Peneliti ingin mengetahui penggunaan buku paket di salah satu SMP di Daerah Istimewa Yogyakarta. Dengan bermacam– macam pertimbangan akhirnya peneliti menentukan SMP XXX sebagai tempat penelitiannya. Setelah data terkumpul dan diolah maka peneliti memperoleh kesimpulan mengenai bagaimana SMP XXX menggunakan buku paket. Kesimpulan tersebut hanya berlaku bagi SMP XXX itu saja. ”
my research is categorized as a case study because I concentrate intensively and in detail my attention on the sixth semester students of D-3 English Department of USU as my specific area. Thus, in other words, D-3 English Department of USU is the place of my research, the error analysis of unity and coherence is the object of my research; whereas, D-3 students writing are the subject of my research and those D-3 students are my source of research data ( respondents ).
In doing this case study, I make and distribute a test and students’ profile to the sixth semester students of D-3 English Department of USU that done in the classroom. I use descriptive quantitative method by collecting data of D-3 English students writing, finding, counting the errors that exist in their writing by a formula, until analyzing the errors.. To support this case study, I also apply library research by collecting, reading, studying books, dictionaries, relevant studies, and students’ thesis deal with the errors in writing.
3.1.1 Data Collecting Method
the number of words in paragraph I imply in this test by looking at Hacker’s statement (1994 : 104) in The bedford Handbook for Writers about paragraph length is felt comfortable to read if it has range between 100 and 200 words. It is Hacker’s statement :
“Most readers feel comfortable reading paragraphs that range between 100 and 200 words. Shorter paragraphs force too much starting and stopping, and longer ones strain the reader’s attention span. There are execptions to this guideline, however. Paragraphs longer than 200 words frequently appear in scholarly writing, where they suggest seriousness and depth. Paragraphs shorter than 100 words occur in newspapers because of narrow columns; in informal essays to quicken the pace; and in business letter, where reader’s routinely skim for main ideas.”
On the other hand, Oshima and Hague say that a paragraph can consist as short as one sentence and as long as tne sentences as a basic unit of organization in writing which has unity (related sentences to develop the main idea) and coherence (good connection of the content of the paragraph). The paragraph should be long enough to develop the main idea clearly, so the number of sentences is unimportant
The second instrument of collecting data is a questionaire after the students finish their writing. This questionaire contains the students’ identity and their explaination about how to write a good paragraph with unity and coherence (what they know about the important things to make a good paragraph).
3.1.2 Data Analyzing Method
The Procedure of Data Analysis
There are some procedures in doing the data analysis. First of all, I collect the data. Next, I identify and classify what errors exist in the students’ writing by circling their errors, whether it is error of unity or error of coherence. Then, I analyse and explain the relationship of sentences and words of paragraph, pronoun reference, transitional markers, and chronological orders in students’ writing to determine whether there is a good connection or not between one to another. To identify, classify, and explain the errors in unity and coherence, i apply Oshima’s and Hagues’s theory Academic Writing Skill (1999). After that, I quantify the number of errors into tables by applying Bungin’s formula :
% 100 x N X
F
F = the frequency of errors
X = the number of errors are obtained based on their types N = the total of errors
CHAPTER IV
ANALYSIS
In this section, I want to work out on the errors, which are made by the D-3 English Department students in using the unity and coherence. In order to handle the analysis, I commit Corder’s procedure of error analysis as has been mentioned in Chapter III. For this purpose, I try to tabulate the items of the test, so I wil find out the students who are able to fill or to answer the test correctly. I will also find out most difficult things in which the students make the errors.
For this analysis, I analyse the students’ writing of D-3 students of class A. The amount of papers that I distribute to the D-3 students of class A is 43 papers, but the papers that I collect from them is 39 papers. Next, from those collected papers, I find out that the students who write a paragraph in which the amount of sentences is equal with equal to ten sentences or more are 15 female students and 6 male students, whereas for the amount of sentences is less than ten sentences (3 - 9 sentences) is 14 male students. Besides that, I get the students who has written the test within the points form are 2 female students, the students who also write it in the points form but does not write his identity is 1 student, and finally, I found there is 2 blank – paper (paper without the answer) that has been given back to me.
For the representative data of my analysis, I use random sampling to choose some of them to be analyzed. Here I take 5 writing that consist of some various paragraph. There are consists of 2 writings which has 10 sentences, 1 writing which has 12 sentences, 1 writing which has 13 and 1 writing which has 15 sentences. I take these five writings because they are representative data that have lots of erros as the mirror of the other students’ writings that I do not describe one by one in this analysis.
1) 10 sentences
THE POSITIVE AND NEGATIVE EFFECTS OF TELEVISION FOR CHILDREN
Television causes positive and negative effects for children. Firstly, the positive effect is it can give children a new lesson about the new environment such as play and communicate with other people. Secondly, it can improve children’s knowledge. For example, how they talk, how make a relation to another person. Last, children get information.
2) 10 sentences
THE POSITIVE AND NEGATIVE EFFECTS OF TELEVISION FOR CHILDREN
The positive effects of television for children may vary. Firstly, childen get much information from the news program. Secondly, children get education from the television such as quiz, studies program, English program, etc. Children will easily absorb their program to their mind. Thirdly, children will be active and more active by imitating some cartoon movies. The negative effects of television for children can be happened although not much. Firstly, the children will imitate too much the adult movie which displayed on TV. Secondly, the children will be more aggresive by watching some certain sports like boxing, wresteling, karate, etc. Thirdly, children will addicted watching their favourite program and will forget or ignore thier study.
Finally, it can be said that the television has some positive and negative effect for children, but if their parents do not guide them in watching TV there will be negative effects.
3) 10 sentences
THE POSITIVE AND NEGATIVE EFFECTS OF TELEVISION FOR CHILDREN
4) 12 sentences
THE POSITIVE AND NEGATIVE EFFECTS OF TELEVISION FOR CHILDREN
We know that technology is important for us. One of the technology is television. Television gives us many advantages. We know about everything from information that we get from television. Beside the positive effects that we get, we also get the negative effects from television. Especially for children. Television give entertainment for children, for example : cartoon. But, if we let the children watching the television without limit, it will caused the children become lazy. So, we must know it and can to limit it. The positive effects is so many. For example, children can study an interesting thing from television, can study about plant and animals and etc. But, if it do not limited, it will dangerous. Not only for children, but also for young people and adult people.
5) 15 sentences
THE POSITIVE AND NEGATIVE EFFECTS OF TELEVISION FOR CHILDREN
dangerous action, and useless. Therefore, it is the parents’ responsibility to control their children from the negative effects of television program.
4.1.1 ANALYSIS OF UNITY
ANALYSIS :
1. ANALYSIS OF UNITY OF PARAGRAPH I
From this paragraph, I do not find the erroneous use of unity because each of sentences in this paragraph supports the idea set out in the topic sentence. Thus, there is no error of unity in this paragraph.
2. ANALYSIS OF UNITY OF PARAGRAPH II
The topic sentence of this paragraph is the last sentence of the paragraph that also serve as a concluding sentence :
Finally, it can be said that the television has some positive and negative effects for children, but if their parents do not guide them in watching TV there will be negative effects.
The topic sentence that is written in the paragraph above is too general or too long statement because it does not limit its specific area that want to be discussed to the readers.
So, this topic sentence should be repaired well so that it become a good topic sentence as follows :
3. ANALYSIS OF UNITY OF PARAGRAPH III
1. From the fifth sentence, there is no a or some supporting sentences that can give some detail informations or explanations for the sentence :
Second, television can improve their knowledge by watching educational program.
Thus, it is important to write some detail sentences that can give information or explanation to that sentence above, for example, by writing what kinds of television program that belong to the educational program that can improne children’s brain.
2. From the eigth sentence in student’s paragraph,
The negative effects of television for children are TV can influence the children activity, make the children lazy, and TV is not good for their health.
4. ANALYSIS OF UNITY OF PARAGRAPH IV
1. The topic setence of the paragraph V is : Television give us many advantages.
This topic sentence does not has a good controlling idea because it does not limit the idea of this paragraph V well. On one side, the sentences of the paragraph tell us the advantages of the television, but the other one, the other snetences gives us the disadvantages of the television. Therfore, ther is an error of the unity made by the student who has written this paragraph because there is no good unity that I can find in it. Thus, it is better for repairing the controlling idea of that topic sentence as follows :
Television gives us many advantages and disadvantages. Controlling idea
2. Irrelevant sentences
The arrangement of the sentences in this paragraph is not so well. I can see and find them from the ninth sentence until the twelfth sentence ( the closing sentence). The ninth sentence below,
The positive effect is so many.
Reconstruction : The positive effects are so many.
For the twelfth sentence, it should be crossed out of this paragraph because it can disturb the unity of this paragraph. This paragraph limits its idea about the television’s advantages and disadvantages only for children, not about the television’s advantages and disadvantages for ypoung people and adult people.
4.1.2 ANALYSIS OF COHERENCE
1. ANALYSIS OF COHERENCE OF PARAGRAPH I
1. The use of pronoun ‘they’ in the fourth sentence above can make this paragraph be incoherent because the meaning of they here can make the readers be misunderstanding to what ‘they’ refers to, whether ‘they’ refers to the children and other people that appear in the previous sentence (in the scond sentence). So, it is better to rewrite the noun ‘children’ in the fourth sentence in order to result the good understanding of the readers.
2. From this fourth sentence, there is a missing of a transition signal ‘and’ as the conjunction to connect how they talk (the first clause) and how make a relation (the second clause). Therefore, there is no use of transition signal for this fourth sentence is an error of coherence.
3. From the second sentence ,
Firstly, the positive effect is it can give children a new lesson about the new environment such as play and communicate with other people.
inappropriate signal to be used in this sentence and ‘such as’ should be substituted by another transition signal that also has function to introduce an example, i. e, for example, for instance, specifically, namely, or to illustration, or etc.
4. From the fourth sentence, there are too short and less effective forms after the word ‘for example’, they are, how they walk and how make a relation. The word ‘for example’ is the transition signal that is usually used in complete sentence. So, it is necessary to change those short forms become complete forms so that the fourth sentence will be a complete sentence as follows :
For example, the children will get a or get some informations about how they walk and make a relation to another people.
2. ANALYSIS OF COHERENCE OF PARAGRAPH II
1. From the sixth sentence,
The negative effects of television for children can be happened although not much.
there is no use of pronoun ‘they’ that should be written after the transition signal ‘although’. So, in this sixth sentence, it is necessary for using pronoun ‘they’ that refers to the negative effects. Thus, this sentence should be rewrite as follows :
The negative effects of television for children can be happened although they are not much.
2. From the ninth sentence,
there is an inappropriate or an erroneous use of transition signal ‘ and’ in it. The transition signal ‘and’ is used inappropriately in this sentence to connect the meaning of the sentence ‘ will forget or ignore their study in which this sentence has also the functian as the result statement of the sentence ‘children will be addicted to watch their favourite program’.
Thus, the appropriate transition signal that can be used to replace ‘and’ are therefore, consequently, hence, or thus that are often used with a semicolon and a
comma to join two independent clauses to form a compound sentence. So, that ninth sentence above should be reconstructed as follows :
Thirdly, children will be addicted to watch their favourite program; therefore, they will forget or ignore their study.
or
Thirdly, children will be addicted to watch their favourite program; consequently, they will forget or ignore their study.
or
Thirdly, children will be addicted to watch their favourite program; hence, they will forget or ignore their study.
or
3. ANALYSIS OF COHERENCE OF PARAGRAPH III
1. We can see that the use of pronoun ‘they’ comes twice in the fourth sentence of the student’s paragraph. From it, an erroneous use of the pronoun ‘they’ is the second ones.
Children who are usually watch television especially the children’s program, they can imagine what they have seen from TV.
The sentence above is a complex sentence, it is, a sentence which has one or more dependent clauses. Which uses relative conjunctions. So, the underlined pronoun ‘they’ above should not be written bak in that fourth sentence. Thus, this pronoun ‘they’ should be crossed out of paragraph.
2. From the ninth sentence of a student’s paragraph below,
Children who like watching TV very much, they will act like what they have watched in TV, and they will act not like a children.
there are two erroneous uses of pronoun ‘they’ that we can find, they are, ‘they’ that comes first (from : they will act like what they have watched in TV) and ‘they’ that comes thirdly (from : tehy will act not like a children).
The ninth sentence of a student’s paragraph is a complex sentence, it is, a sentence that has one independent clause (main clause) and one or more dependent clause that uses a relative pronoun to join them both.
They will act like what they have watched in TV. and
are the dependent clauses. Thus, those undrlined pronoun can be omitted from that complex sentence. So, that complex sentence should be written back into :
Children who like to watch TV very much will act like what they have watched in TV, and will act not like a children.
II. ANALYSIS OF COHERENCE OF PARAGRAPH IV
1. There are no use of chronological order for whole arrangement of the sentences in this paragraph. There are no sequences things that are described in this paragraph, such as, the use of the words first, after, then, next, now, finally, and so on to organize the advantages and the disadvantages of the television chronologically.
4.3. THE PECENTAGE OF THE DATA ANALYSIS
To percentage the errors, it is used the Bungin’s formula. %
100 x N X
F
By applying the formula above, here are the percentages of the errors : Errors of Unity :
a. Errors of use of subject and verb for topic and controlling idea : F = 5 / 154 x 100 % = 3, 25 %
b. Errors of use controlling idea too generall or too specific F = 5 / 154 x 100 % = 9, 74 %
c. Errors of irrelevant sentences :
Errors of Coherence
a. Errors of repetition of key nouns
F = 4 / 154 x 100 % = 2, 59 %
a. Errors of the constituent of pronouns
F = 7 /154 x 100 % = 4, 55 %
c. Errors of the transition signals
F = 68 / 154 x 100 % 44, 15 %
d. Errors of the chronological orders
F = 38 / 154 x 100 % = 24, 68 %
4.4. THE TABLE OF THE ANALYSIS RESULT
No. Types of Errors Total
1. Errors of Unty
a. errors of subject and verb in topic sentence
