Contextualising the journey
CHAPTER 1 The Journey begins
2.2 Genealogical Analysis
2.2.1 Pre-Missionary Sexuality Education in Lesotho
There is little written about the traditional practices of Basotho people because the Basotho are an oral society (Epprecht, 2000; Guma, 2001; Sekese, 2002) that passes history and wisdom from generation to generation through telling stories (Coplan, 2006;
Fandrych, 2003; Mda, 1993, Matsela, 1979). Thus most of what appears in this section is from stories told. I have recorded only what people felt free to discuss and what is taught in Lesotho schools as part of Basotho cultural studies.
Traditional education for Basotho children was both formal and informal. Formal education was through the initiation school (Mda, 1993; Matsela, 1979; Mturi &
Hennink, 2005) which was the “responsibility of the elders, local leaders and traditional doctors in the villages” (MoE, 1982, p. 1); while informal education was through the socialisation of children as they grew up in the home. The traditional education system aimed at producing individuals who were socially responsible and committed to serving their societies and families (Coplan, 1992, 1993; Mochaba, 1992; Mohapeloa, 1982).
Young boys herded the lower animals such as sheep and goats until they graduated to herding the higher animals such as cattle, horses and donkeys. According to Sekese (1999) it was unacceptable for young boys to spend a lot of time with their mothers during the day. They were expected to leave the house and join other boys to learn how to become men. During this time, young boys were taught about and played several games that were sexual in nature. An example of such a game is tŝipho8 whose movements were an imitation of the mating ritual (Sekese, 2002).
Basotho boys walked around naked until such a time when they were grown up enough to realise they were naked and would then look for a piece of cloth to cover the groin. Once they had done this then the parents would provide their sons with clothes to wear. While in Western eyes this practice would be seen as child abuse and neglect, the Basotho saw this practice as part of training young boys to become strong and hardened men. Merriam and Mohamad (2000) argue that one‟s upbringing is so ingrained in cultural values that
8Tŝipho was played by boys in the fields as they herded the livestock. It involved holding onto the ground with both hands and raising the buttocks and feet off the ground, while following this with the up-and- down movement of the buttocks.
people act out such values involuntarily. Thus the practices that are considered as part of one‟s culture are rarely scrutinised because they are part of who we are. This is also true for several Basotho cultural practises which under scrutiny would seem disadvantageous to the people, while the people practising them would not be seeing them as such.
Upon reaching adolescence, young boys were expected to join the traditional initiation school where they would be taught how to become real men who could fight for their chief and protect their families. During the initiation period the young men were then taught about sex and what to expect from their women. Guma (2001) points out that the young initiates gave themselves names (beginning with the prefix Le-) that reflected their behaviour, their personalities, or clan-names, (e.g. Lefosa, one who hits off target). The initiates sang mangae and lithoko (praise-poems) in which they celebrated their new names during the graduation ceremony (Mangoaela, 2001; Matsela, 1979), and such names became known to the whole community (Coplan, 1993; 1994). However, the initiates were also given private names which could be only known by those who were in the same cohort (Guma, 2001). Upon graduation from the initiation school, the young men were expected to choose brides from the village girls, preferable those who had been initiates, and get married as soon as possible. The immediate marriage was to prevent the initiates from practising their newly found sexual skills out of wedlock (Makatjane, 2002;
Sekese, 2002). This was the time when they were also expected to join the men at the chief‟s kraal to learn about the governance of the society and other male issues.
As for young girls, their place was in the house with their mothers. Maitse (2000) posits that Basotho women were the keepers of knowledge on family histories and traditional practices. They were expected to teach their daughters how to become good women who could take care of a household and raise children. Young girls practised their skills by serving their brothers and through games such as playing house (Gay, 1986; Goduka, 1999). There are several activities that served to socialise young Basotho girls into adult female roles and relationships. When they played house, they had rag or clay dolls with which they practised taking care of babies and pretended to cook for them. When I was still a young girl we used to have a big setup of pretend houses built from stone and
boxes. The older girls would be mothers and fathers while the younger ones would be the children of the „families‟. At „night‟ the mothers and fathers would have pretend-sex according to how they had seen their parents doing it. I remember hearing interesting arguments of “Ntate oaka le „me oaka ha ba etse joalo, ba etsa tjena...” (My mom and dad do not do it like that. This is how they do it...). The implication was that every other child had somehow seen their parents having sex. Sometimes we would play very
“elaborate mock-weddings” to celebrate marriage, mostly in girl-only occasions because the boys were always out herding the livestock (cf. Gay, 1986, p. 97). I remember that, as a young girl, playing in the mock-weddings I never got the chance to become the bride, to my dismay, because I was always the lead singer in the wedding procession.
Basotho girls also engaged in mummy-baby relationships through which they practised and experienced the nurturing aspects of being mothers or being mothered. An older girl would be the mummy and a younger girl would be the baby. The attractiveness of the baby or mummy was the basis on which they were chosen (Motalingoane-Khau, 2007b).
The duty of the mummy was to protect the baby and cater for her needs, while the baby was expected to run errands for the mummy. One of the expectations in these relationships was intimacy. The mummy and baby would kiss and cuddle, or sometimes fondle each other in a manner leading to arousal or even orgasm. These relationships were, however, not labelled as sexual, but innocent fun for girls (Gay, 1986, 1993;
Kendall, 1999). According to Kendall (1999), these relationships between girls and women were not regarded as sexual because there was no penis involved. She argues that the Basotho women she worked with considered sex as only that which includes penile penetration.
Girls were also taught how to pull their inner labia at an early age before they could start having their menstrual periods. It was believed that menstruation hardened the inner labia, making it difficult for them to elongate upon pulling (cf. Arnfred, 2007; Parikh, 2005; Tamale, 2005). According to Thetela (2002), aunts and other younger women taught girls how to pull the inner labia. Khau (2009d) argues that girls who did not elongate their inner labia were told that they would not get married or if they got married
they would not be able to please their husbands sexually and hence loose their love. It was said that elongating the inner labia increased mocheso (heat) in the woman and this made sex more pleasurable for the man (Gay, 1986). The intriguing fact about the pulling of the inner labia was the fact that girls assisted each other with the pulling, thus engaging in what I would call mutual masturbation among the girls. Despite the homo- erotic inclination of this practice, Khau (2009d) argues that labial elongation among the Basotho was used only for the promotion of heterosexuality and male sexual enjoyment.
This practice is evidence that female sensuality was encouraged while at the same time it was restrained through prohibiting girls from eating eggs, offal and other high protein foods because it was believed that such foods would heighten the girls‟ mocheso, causing them to desire sex. Thus these two practices show that female sensuality was never denied (Gay, 1986, 1993; Kendall, 1999). It was encouraged in some cases and at the same time restrained.
When a young girl started having her menstrual periods, it was a time of celebration because she was grown up and ready for marriage. In some clans the girl was dressed in a thethana9 and her body covered in red ochre. Another young girl would accompany her to the well. The menstruating girl would have a clay pot on her head and when they got to the well the other girl would fill the pot on the head until it overflowed onto the bearer (Matsela, 1979; Sekese, 1999, 2002). The overflowing water would mix with the red ochre and run all over the young girl symbolising the red of the menstrual blood. The girls would then walk back to the village among ululations of the village women who would acknowledge that the girl was now a young woman (Maitse, 2000). In other clans, on the day of the first menstrual period the young girl was seated on a heap of manure for all people to see. Makatjane (2002) argues that the symbolism was that like the fertility of the manure, the girl was also fertile and ready to produce children. The village men and boys were thus made aware by such functions that the girl was a young woman who should be respected. This meant that the girl was no longer expected to play any of the sexual games that Basotho children played (Sekese, 2002, p. 30), lest she got pregnant.
9 Thethana is a bead skirt that was the traditional Basotho dress for girls. This bead skirt sometimes was just long enough to cover the pubic region and part of the buttocks.
Such a girl was ready for marriage and had to be prepared for marriage through the initiation school.
Young girls attended the traditional initiation school where they were taught about sex, how to become good wives and to please their men sexually (cf. Goduka, 1999; Mats′ela, 1979). During the initiation period, young women were given masculine names of their ancestors as a symbol of achievement (Sekese, 2002). They were deemed as being
„almost‟ as brave as men, thus the masculine name. Guma (2001) states that the names were formulated by attaching the male prefix Ra- to their maternal uncle‟s name (e.g.
Ramakalo, uncle‟s name being Makalo), or to nouns and verbs that conveyed qualities such as adeptness, speed, and skilfulness. For example, a girl initiate could be called
“Ralebelo”, meaning “one with great speed.” These names were known to and used only by those who had been in the same initiation cohort or had been involved in the initiation rites.
What actually happened during the traditional initiation ceremony was labelled as koma10 and was never revealed (see Paroz, 1993). Mturi and Hennink (2005, p. 133) also observe that “little is known about the content of the sex education curriculum at initiation schools as these schools are not regulated…” Paroz (1993) writes that any initiate who dared talk about the practice of initiation was supposed to be killed before they could corrupt the innocence of those who had never been to the traditional school. This was partly because anyone who had never been to the traditional initiation school was treated as a perpetual child irrespective of their age, and hence did not need to know about adult issues such as those taught at the school. Sekese (1999) observes that if a person who had never been to the initiation school was heard talking knowledgeably about the initiation rituals, such a person was immediately taken to the initiation school and forced to join.
These practices were used to maintain the supposed sexual innocence of children and to promote people‟s desire to attend the initiation schools so that they could learn about
10According to Paroz (1993, p. 184), Koma means initiation secret, or a special song sung during the night when boys are being initiated.
adulthood. According to Guma (2001) prohibiting any discussion of what happened in the initiation schools made them more interesting for those who had never attended. One could argue that keeping valuable information from people does not assist a nation. It can be argued that the secrecy surrounding the traditional initiation school is not necessary.
However, the Basotho treated the initiation school as a rite of passage (Maitse, 2000;
Thetela, 2002) and hence only those who qualified for the particular stage were allowed the information.
Additionally, Basotho youth played tenye and sephumula (Sekese, 2002, pp. 45- 46), which were used as a platform for choosing marriage partners. In these games boys and girls would sing and dance together (Coplan, 1994). If a boy fancied a certain girl, he would remove his necklace and give it to the girl. If the girl was also attracted to the boy she would then accept the necklace. There were some games, such as selia-lia (Sekese, 2002, p. 45), where girls made their own choice of boys and gave them artefacts to keep as tokens of their love. These games were only played among boys and girls because it was not expected that girls would choose other girls, or boys choosing other boys (see Gay, 1993 and Kendall, 1999). The expectation was for opposite sexes to attract. To some extent, some of the games were sexual in the sense that the boy and girl who had attracted each other would touch each other, embrace and kiss. However, according to Sekese (2002, p. 46), people were more disciplined in those days and hence the games did not go beyond simple kissing.
These games highlight the hetero-normative and hetero-patriarchal lifestyle that the Basotho adopted. They show that Basotho families were constituted along heterosexual, patrilineal, and patrilocal lines (Khabo, 1995; Matsela, 1979; Mosetse, 2005; Thetela, 2002) which did not leave room for any expression of homosexual tendencies (cf. Gay, 1993; Kendall, 1999). This, however, does not deny the existence of homosexual activity among the Basotho. Thetela (2002) argues that the lack of sexuality discourse among Basotho makes it difficult for sex to be discussed in public. The same argument can be used in relation to homosexuality. The lack of discourse to label a phenomenon such as homosexuality among the Basotho makes it a silent presence. Even though it is practiced,
it is not talked about (Khau, 2009d; Matsela, 1979). Some anthropological studies, however, show that despite the lack of recognition of homosexuality within African communities, same sex unions and friendships have been in existence in many societies (Eskridge, 1993; Gay, 1993; Louw, 2001).
The traditional education system, as discussed above, was abandoned with the emergence of missionary education which is discussed in the next section.